changing, but the need to get home overpowered every thought and instinct. Tossing his bag onto the backseat of his rental, he turned the engine over, waiting for the heater to warm up.
Exhaustion over took him, and he rested his forehead on the steering wheel and closed his eyes. Instantly, the images of children’s faces pressed against windows filled his head. Their screams amid the raging fire roared in his ears. Choking on a sob, he pounded his head into the steering wheel. Would he ever learn to live with what he’d done? Did he deserve to live with what he’d done?
A banging on his window brought him back to the present. A man in the car rental company’s uniform rapped on his window. “Hey, dude, you okay?”
Jerking upright, Will shoved the car into reverse.
The employee jumped backward. “Hey! Watch it!”
Will sped out of the parking lot, heading up I-35 to Morgantown. He just had to keep his shit together a little while longer. But he’d been keeping his shit together for thirty-one years. He wasn’t sure how much longer he could last.
Snow continued to fall as Will drove north, the windshield wipers lulling Will into a sense of security he knew was false. “I need to get home,” he told himself. “Everything will be okay once I get home.” But the lack of homecoming he’d received at the airport proved to Will that he was lying to himself. Nevertheless, he clung to his hope. It was all he had left.
Chapter Two
Will idled the car at the curb. Smoke rise from the chimney of the brick ranch house at the end of the cul-de-sac. The smoke faded into the darkening gray sky while the snow continued to fall, covering the ground in a blanket of white.
His hands twisted the steering wheel as he clenched his teeth. Will’s father’s car sat in the driveway, the windshield covered in a couple of inches of snow. His father had recently retired from the Marines, and Will’s misconduct would be an embarrassment. Will had lived his entire life seeking his father’s approval, without success. At the moment, he couldn’t handle his father’s recrimination on top of his own self-loathing.
But inside that house was the one person who had always been there when Will needed comfort. Who had held him as a kid when the bad dreams came night after night. The one person who’d helped him make sense of his life. He tapped his thumb in indecision. And dread. Why hadn’t she come to the airport?
A slow burn filled his throat. There was only one way to find out. He parked the car in front of the house and paused. With a shaky hand, he opened the car door, his hand lingering on the handle. He watched the house as a slow trickle of fear slid down his back.
His anger rose at his indecision. This was ridiculous. He’d stared down the barrel of a gun at countless enemies. Will only had to get past his domineering father to see his mother. With a renewed sense of purpose, he strode up the sidewalk to the front door.
But when he stood on the doorstep, he hesitated again. Why hadn’t his mother come to the airport? Why hadn’t he heard from her since the incident ? The worry had burrowed in his gut for weeks, but it had been easier to ignore six thousand miles away. Now it exploded, setting his nerve endings tingling. Sure, he’d faced countless enemies, but the truth was that she was the one person who could destroy him. He was about to face his biggest fear.
He gave two hard raps on the solid wooden door. Several seconds passed before the door opened, and Will stared into the grim face of his father.
The Colonel glared for several seconds before he spoke. “You have a lot of nerve showing up here.”
Will cleared his throat. What did he care what his father thought? Nothing Will ever did was good enough. “Is Mom here?”
“I want you to leave this property right now.”
Will’s voice rose. “Is Mom home?” He looked over his father’s shoulder and saw her round the corner, her face
Exhaustion over took him, and he rested his forehead on the steering wheel and closed his eyes. Instantly, the images of children’s faces pressed against windows filled his head. Their screams amid the raging fire roared in his ears. Choking on a sob, he pounded his head into the steering wheel. Would he ever learn to live with what he’d done? Did he deserve to live with what he’d done?
A banging on his window brought him back to the present. A man in the car rental company’s uniform rapped on his window. “Hey, dude, you okay?”
Jerking upright, Will shoved the car into reverse.
The employee jumped backward. “Hey! Watch it!”
Will sped out of the parking lot, heading up I-35 to Morgantown. He just had to keep his shit together a little while longer. But he’d been keeping his shit together for thirty-one years. He wasn’t sure how much longer he could last.
Snow continued to fall as Will drove north, the windshield wipers lulling Will into a sense of security he knew was false. “I need to get home,” he told himself. “Everything will be okay once I get home.” But the lack of homecoming he’d received at the airport proved to Will that he was lying to himself. Nevertheless, he clung to his hope. It was all he had left.
Chapter Two
Will idled the car at the curb. Smoke rise from the chimney of the brick ranch house at the end of the cul-de-sac. The smoke faded into the darkening gray sky while the snow continued to fall, covering the ground in a blanket of white.
His hands twisted the steering wheel as he clenched his teeth. Will’s father’s car sat in the driveway, the windshield covered in a couple of inches of snow. His father had recently retired from the Marines, and Will’s misconduct would be an embarrassment. Will had lived his entire life seeking his father’s approval, without success. At the moment, he couldn’t handle his father’s recrimination on top of his own self-loathing.
But inside that house was the one person who had always been there when Will needed comfort. Who had held him as a kid when the bad dreams came night after night. The one person who’d helped him make sense of his life. He tapped his thumb in indecision. And dread. Why hadn’t she come to the airport?
A slow burn filled his throat. There was only one way to find out. He parked the car in front of the house and paused. With a shaky hand, he opened the car door, his hand lingering on the handle. He watched the house as a slow trickle of fear slid down his back.
His anger rose at his indecision. This was ridiculous. He’d stared down the barrel of a gun at countless enemies. Will only had to get past his domineering father to see his mother. With a renewed sense of purpose, he strode up the sidewalk to the front door.
But when he stood on the doorstep, he hesitated again. Why hadn’t his mother come to the airport? Why hadn’t he heard from her since the incident ? The worry had burrowed in his gut for weeks, but it had been easier to ignore six thousand miles away. Now it exploded, setting his nerve endings tingling. Sure, he’d faced countless enemies, but the truth was that she was the one person who could destroy him. He was about to face his biggest fear.
He gave two hard raps on the solid wooden door. Several seconds passed before the door opened, and Will stared into the grim face of his father.
The Colonel glared for several seconds before he spoke. “You have a lot of nerve showing up here.”
Will cleared his throat. What did he care what his father thought? Nothing Will ever did was good enough. “Is Mom here?”
“I want you to leave this property right now.”
Will’s voice rose. “Is Mom home?” He looked over his father’s shoulder and saw her round the corner, her face
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