Hold U Down by Keisha Ervin Page A

you.”
    â€œYeah, okay, and I guess I’m Boo-boo the Fool.” Unique sniffled, rolling her eyes.
    â€œCalm down, shorty. I ain’t going nowhere.” Bigg gently took her hand, easing her onto his lap. “I told you, you mine now. I got mad feelings for you, girl. I ain’t going nowhere. Besides, it ain’t even like that. I ain’t had an episode in a while.”
    â€œWhat the fuck is an episode?”
    â€œSee, you think that being manic depressive is the same as being schizophrenic, but it isn’t.”
    â€œWell, what is it then?”
    â€œManic depression is an illness that effects changes in your mood, thought, and behavior. When I have an episode, that means that my creatine levels are at an all-time high. I’m not stable when I get like that. Sometimes it can last for hours, sometimes weeks, but as long as I take my medication, I’m cool. I’ma be honest wit’ you, though. I don’t like taking that shit.”
    â€œWhy?”
    â€œâ€™Cause it makes me feel like I’m dependent on a drug or something. I mean, you know what I do. I see these fiends out here and how they can’t go a day without getting a hit. That’s how I am. If I don’t take my medication, my ass will straight go seven thirty on yo’ ass.”
    â€œDon’t lie to me, Bigg. You swear you’re taking your medication?”
    â€œYeah, I swear.” He placed his right hand up to God. “Look, I’ma be real wit’ you, Unique. I had a fucked-up childhood. My ol’ bird used to beat the hell out of me and my ol’ dude used to sit back and let her. My moms was manic depressive too. Every time her ass would flip and have an episode and beat the dog shit outta me, my pop would tell me that she didn’t mean to hurt me, and that it was her illness that made her do it. I hated my mother for that shit. That bitch used to tell me I wasn’t shit and that I wouldn’t amount to nothing. She told me she wished I was dead.”
    â€œFor real?”
    â€œYeah. She died, though, while I was locked up. Me and my ol’ dude still speak from time to time.”
    â€œAt least you know who your father is,” Unique said, staring off into space.
    â€œIt’s cool, ma.”
    â€œNo, it’s not, because I know how that shit feels to have your mother not give a fuck about you and for your daddy to not be there for you. But it’s cool. I got you. I don’t even wanna talk about it anymore. What’s your son’s name?” Unique asked, trying to forget the thought of her own mother.
    â€œDontay.”
    â€œAhh, that’s cute. I bet he looks just like you.” She smiled, easing up a bit.
    â€œYeah, that’s my li’l man,” Bigg said, rubbing his stomach. “A nigga full as fuck.” Reaching out and grabbing her by the waist, he pulled her close. “Empty my plate for me, would you? I’m ready to go to bed.”
    â€œDo I look like my name is Moms Mabley? And I didn’t say that you could spend the night.”
    â€œYou don’t want me to spend the night?” he asked, staring intensely into her eyes.
    â€œI don’t make it a habit of allowing strange men into my house, let alone my bed,” she joked.
    â€œFirst of all, I’m not a strange man. I’m yo’ nigga, so get it right. And from now on, your door will always be open to me.”
    Looking at him like he was crazy, Unique rolled her eyes, got up from the table, and emptied her plate. As she walked past him, she turned off the light, went into her bedroom, and climbed back into bed, leaving Bigg sitting alone in the dark. Laughing at her strong will, he followed her into the bedroom. Bigg kicked off his shoes and climbed into bed with her. Not able to lay next to him and not touch him, Unique turned over, placed her head on his chest, and fell asleep to the sound of his