Hidden Deep by Amy Patrick Page A

His clear green eyes glowed with intense emotion. He was more beautiful than I’d thought a male could possibly look.
    Still, when his warm lips touched mine, my eyelids shut anyway. Maybe trying to hold in all the wonderful feeling threatening to flood out of every pore in my body. There was sweetness again, like the drink he gave me, but even better combined with the unique flavor of him .
    I opened my lips, hungry for the melting sugar taste of his mouth. He responded with a gasp and clenched his large hand around my upper arm, roughly pulling me even closer. The kiss went on and on, deepening and pulling me further into a dangerous unknown place that was exactly where I wanted to go.
    I was vaguely aware of a self-protective instinct struggling to be heard. The one that had never allowed me to go beyond friendship or hand-holding and lukewarm kisses with anyone before. The one that had kept me at a distance from any boy who’d ever seemed capable of inspiring interest in anything more. I pushed it back down, shutting it temporarily away, while I plunged recklessly down this new path with Lad.
    His arms came around me, nearly crushing in his intensity, and I pressed against him, trying even harder to erase every last breath of air between us. I truly don’t know where it would’ve ever stopped had he not abruptly ended the kiss and pulled away—just like the first time when he’d halted our kiss much too soon.
    “Ryann, we have to stop.” Lad still gripped my shoulders firmly in his hands, his face and upper body turned away from me. He looked and sounded like someone in agony.
    “What’s wrong? Why do we have to stop? We just started,” I whispered with a pout, sounding like the pitiful kiss-drunk fool I was. I’d decided to go for it, and now he was being cautious?
    Lad’s breathing calmed little by little, until finally, he turned his face back to me. He spoke softly, seriously. “You’re right. We have started something. I shouldn’t have let that happen, but I couldn’t stop myself. I don’t know if I can stop where this is going now. I like it too much. I like you too much.”
    He let out an anguished groan, pulling his hands away and clenching them into fists, burying his face in them. He stared at the ground and spoke into his knuckles. His voice was rough. “This is terrible. You’re everything I’ve wanted for so long, and now you’re here, and it’s as good—no, better than I always imagined. And I can’t have you. It’s killing me.”
    I had no idea what he meant, but my mind raced, charged by his extraordinary words. He was so distraught. I stretched my hand out and brushed it through the soft curls on the back of his down-turned head.
    At my touch, Lad went completely still, sucking in his breath through clenched teeth. His fingertips dug into his hard thighs as he sat rigid on the rock beside me. I slid my fingers through the golden locks, soothing and stroking his scalp and the tense muscles of his neck, feeling him gradually relax minute by minute. Eventually, he looked up at me.
    “I’m sorry,” he said in a low voice.
    “It’s all right. Why did you say you can’t have me? I’m right here. I want to be with you.” I continued with a bashful grin. “And, in case you didn’t notice, you were well on your way to having me.”
    “That’s the problem. It’s too easy to get carried away with you. It feels so good, so right. I’ve wanted this more than you can imagine. But it’s not that easy. Even if you think you want me, too, we can’t simply have what we want.”
    I practically climbed into his lap in my quest to get close, comfort him, and understand his distress. “Why not? Tell me. I’ll try to understand.”
    He gently traced my cheekbone with one fingertip. “For my people, the choosing of a mate is a serious, and… lasting decision. We couple for life. If one mate is lost, the other remains alone and goes through a mourning process so severe… they’re