Hawk and Dove (Rock Star Romance Novel) by Amanada Lawless Page B

living in. If I had
let something happen between us back there, a dozen gawkers would have been
along to spoil the moment.
    Ellie’s name would be splashed across gossip blogs in the
same breath as mine, and that would be it. I don’t want to put her through the
media circus that occurs around every development in my romantic life.
    The women I’m seen with are always treated like Groupies of
the Week by the music press, and I’m not OK with Ellie being lumped in with the
others. She’s as far from them as can be. For one, I actually like Ellie. And the last thing I want to do is hand over whatever privacy she has
left to the tabloids.
    If something’s going to happen between Ellie and I, it has
to be on her terms. I’m not going to pounce on her in the heat of the moment,
tempted though I might be. This is quite a departure from my usual “Anything
Goes” philosophy of romance, but it’s not like that school of thought was doing
me any real favors.
    “I have to go get ready,” I tell her.
    “OK,” she smiles gamely.
    I can tell she’s confused and a little put off by my
evasion. I can only hope that this doesn’t drive a wedge between us. The last
thing I want to do is extinguish whatever’s crackling between us. I hope she
knows that I’m not trying to avoid her—I’m just trying to avoid making her life
more difficult for my sake. No time to worry about it now, though. Hopefully,
we’ll be able to sort everything out later tonight. If she deigns to wait that
long, of course.
    “Your stuff gets a little heavy sometimes, right?” she asks.
    “Sometimes,” I tell her, “I really won’t be offended if
that’s not your thing.”
    “I like all kinds of things,” she says, “I’m not a strictly
ukulele-and-harmonica kind of girl.”
    “I didn’t suppose that you were,” I smile.
    “And besides,” she goes on, taking a step towards me, “Even
if I may not be well-acquainted with something, it doesn’t mean I’m not
interested in learning something new.”
    I swallow hard, and will my body to behave itself. There’s a
renewed, irresistible determination glinting in Ellie’s eyes. I know that look
quite well.
    But there’s something else behind the raw desire, something
more private, more secret. She wants me as badly as I want her, that much I'm
sure, but it’s not just a one night fling that she wants. She’s making herself
vulnerable to me in a way that women usually don’t. Usually, it’s a roll in the
hay and a peck on the cheek. But with Ellie...
    There’s something in her that I recognize. Something
fragile, and honest, and more than a little lonely. I recognize it because I
can feel it too—though I’d be loathe to admit it to anyone in the world.
    Being with Ellie would mean stripping away every defensive
layer I’ve managed to build up over the years. But what if we tried it, this
whole new kind of honesty, and something went wrong? Can I really risk
dismantling these carefully crafted bits of armor without some kind of
assurance that things are going to work out?
    Or, forget “work out”, just not end in a horrible train
wreck of heartbreak? How does anyone get to know someone else without that kind
of guarantee?
    “You’d better get going,” she says, taking a quick step
forward.
    Before I can respond, she gives me a simple kiss on the
cheek. Her lips brush against my stubbled skin, sending a scorching bolt of
sensation straight through me. I look down at her, more than a bit bemused.
This girl has already got quite the hold on me.
    “Go on then,” she laughs, “Break a leg! Or someone else’s.
Whatever you rock and roll types are into.”
    “I’ll do my best,” I smile, turning reluctantly away from
her and tearing through the backstage realm toward the green room. It’s time I
see to my rock star duties again.
    I fumble toward the makeshift tent that’s supposed to be
serving as our green room. Ducking into the flimsy lean-to, I nearly burst out
laughing