or broke into my room, I’d never stop screaming about it. This was a horrible idea.
And yet, as I lean against Dad’s open door, hurriedly fitting the screws back into the knob, I feel a strange center of calm. How can they be getting a divorce? Mom and Dad, in spite of this Christine thing, are somehow still in love.
I refuse to hope for anything, but even as I try to smother it, a tiny spark remains.
I drop the screwdriver and fumble after the last screw, feeling around blindly in the carpet under Dad’s desk. Scowling, I grab the knob and rattle it. Even without the last screw, it looks like it will stay in place, and if I can—
It’s only a whisper of air over my skin, but all of my muscles tense. Dry-mouthed, I push to my feet as the garage door clicks shut. I meet my father’s sharp gaze as he walks down the stairs from the entryway, watch the understanding bloom on his face as he looks from the screwdriver in my hands to the evidence of the open door behind me. And then his eyes narrow in an expression of pure fury.
“Get. Out.”
Moving through the doorway as far from his visibly shaking body as I can, I drop the screwdriver and run.
The Hardest Word
Justin
Stretching, I yawn and squint at the small screen on my phone.
There are currently 3 Guests and 5 Users online at Kids of Trans Forum Chat.
Online Users:
C4Buzz
Viking
Amberheart
Styx
Leary
JustC
C4Buzz: Are people just lurking, cuz no one is saying anything?
JustC: Yeah … it says Styx is on, but s/he hasn’t posted anything … huh.
Viking: So, what’s going on with you?
JustC: Still here in boo-cannon. Sick of it.
C4Buzz: That’s your dad’s, right? not going good?
Viking: Buchannan? Rlly? Live near there.
JustC: It’s okay … just … a little real, u kno? Was easier at home.
C4Buzz: Yeah. Easier to keep your head straight.
Viking: JustC, g2g. Message me [email protected] if u want to get togethr. Bye
A quick knock. Before I can say anything, the door opens and Ysabel hurtles in. Her eyes are wide, and she’s blinking hard. She closes the door silently and slides to the floor behind it.
“What happened?” I ask, halfway sitting up.
“Nothing,” Ysabel says, and draws her knees to her chest. She’s shaking.
“Don’t give me that. Ys?”
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
Okay, then
. I wait, but she won’t look at me. After a moment, I lie back and look at my phone screen again.
Amberheart: Ezr when u don’t have 2 c.
C4Buzz: Hey Amberheart. Bad day?
Amberheart: No. Talkng 2 JustC.
JustC: ???
Amberheart: Ez 2 freak when u c the clothes.
JustC: Didn’t see clothes.
Amberheart: Huh.
JustC: No x-dress. Just trying 2 deal—
“Justin?” Dad calls, and knocks. Ysabel scoots into the corner behind the door.
JustC: g2g. Bye.
I tuck my phone out of sight and sit up. “Yeah?”
My father opens the door and steps in, holding up the cordless phone. “Mom wants to say hello. And then give the phone to your sister.”
I take the phone, shooting a glance at Ysabel, who is sitting hunched in on herself, her head down. Dad backs out of the room and closes the door behind him without even looking in her direction. Frowning, I put the phone to my ear.
“Mom?”
“Hey, Justin.” My mother’s voice is warm. “How’s it going?”
“It’s okay, I guess.”
“Are you sleeping all right? Did you remember your mouth guard?”
I roll my eyes, glad she can’t see me. “Yeah, I’m sleeping okay so far. You cooking anything interesting?”
Mom makes a so-so noise. “Just a company brunch, nothing too interesting.”
“Oh.” Silence hums along the phone lines.
“Well, I guess you guys are going rafting tomorrow, huh?” my mother continues brightly.
“We’re
what
?”
“Oops. I hope that wasn’t supposed to be a surprise.”
“What does Dad know about rafting?”
Mom laughs. “Probably more than you do,” she says. “You’re going with a group, though.”
“Oh.” Belatedly I remember
And yet, as I lean against Dad’s open door, hurriedly fitting the screws back into the knob, I feel a strange center of calm. How can they be getting a divorce? Mom and Dad, in spite of this Christine thing, are somehow still in love.
I refuse to hope for anything, but even as I try to smother it, a tiny spark remains.
I drop the screwdriver and fumble after the last screw, feeling around blindly in the carpet under Dad’s desk. Scowling, I grab the knob and rattle it. Even without the last screw, it looks like it will stay in place, and if I can—
It’s only a whisper of air over my skin, but all of my muscles tense. Dry-mouthed, I push to my feet as the garage door clicks shut. I meet my father’s sharp gaze as he walks down the stairs from the entryway, watch the understanding bloom on his face as he looks from the screwdriver in my hands to the evidence of the open door behind me. And then his eyes narrow in an expression of pure fury.
“Get. Out.”
Moving through the doorway as far from his visibly shaking body as I can, I drop the screwdriver and run.
The Hardest Word
Justin
Stretching, I yawn and squint at the small screen on my phone.
There are currently 3 Guests and 5 Users online at Kids of Trans Forum Chat.
Online Users:
C4Buzz
Viking
Amberheart
Styx
Leary
JustC
C4Buzz: Are people just lurking, cuz no one is saying anything?
JustC: Yeah … it says Styx is on, but s/he hasn’t posted anything … huh.
Viking: So, what’s going on with you?
JustC: Still here in boo-cannon. Sick of it.
C4Buzz: That’s your dad’s, right? not going good?
Viking: Buchannan? Rlly? Live near there.
JustC: It’s okay … just … a little real, u kno? Was easier at home.
C4Buzz: Yeah. Easier to keep your head straight.
Viking: JustC, g2g. Message me [email protected] if u want to get togethr. Bye
A quick knock. Before I can say anything, the door opens and Ysabel hurtles in. Her eyes are wide, and she’s blinking hard. She closes the door silently and slides to the floor behind it.
“What happened?” I ask, halfway sitting up.
“Nothing,” Ysabel says, and draws her knees to her chest. She’s shaking.
“Don’t give me that. Ys?”
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
Okay, then
. I wait, but she won’t look at me. After a moment, I lie back and look at my phone screen again.
Amberheart: Ezr when u don’t have 2 c.
C4Buzz: Hey Amberheart. Bad day?
Amberheart: No. Talkng 2 JustC.
JustC: ???
Amberheart: Ez 2 freak when u c the clothes.
JustC: Didn’t see clothes.
Amberheart: Huh.
JustC: No x-dress. Just trying 2 deal—
“Justin?” Dad calls, and knocks. Ysabel scoots into the corner behind the door.
JustC: g2g. Bye.
I tuck my phone out of sight and sit up. “Yeah?”
My father opens the door and steps in, holding up the cordless phone. “Mom wants to say hello. And then give the phone to your sister.”
I take the phone, shooting a glance at Ysabel, who is sitting hunched in on herself, her head down. Dad backs out of the room and closes the door behind him without even looking in her direction. Frowning, I put the phone to my ear.
“Mom?”
“Hey, Justin.” My mother’s voice is warm. “How’s it going?”
“It’s okay, I guess.”
“Are you sleeping all right? Did you remember your mouth guard?”
I roll my eyes, glad she can’t see me. “Yeah, I’m sleeping okay so far. You cooking anything interesting?”
Mom makes a so-so noise. “Just a company brunch, nothing too interesting.”
“Oh.” Silence hums along the phone lines.
“Well, I guess you guys are going rafting tomorrow, huh?” my mother continues brightly.
“We’re
what
?”
“Oops. I hope that wasn’t supposed to be a surprise.”
“What does Dad know about rafting?”
Mom laughs. “Probably more than you do,” she says. “You’re going with a group, though.”
“Oh.” Belatedly I remember
Similar Books
