the photo with Hailey. Well, sort of.
“I don’t ken him exactly,” he said. “I ken his cousin, though.”
“His cousin, then? Who’s his cousin?”
“Cousin’s Rob Roy Moffett, innit?”
“Where can I find him?”
“Naw far. Between here and Edinburgh.”
“Can you take me to him?”
He lifted a bony shoulder nearly to his ear. “Naw tonight, I’m afraid.”
“Why not?”
“Because there are naw visiting hours after dark.”
“He’s in hospital?” Ashdown had asked.
The kid shook his head. “HMP Shotts.”
With that the kid had motioned to Zoey, who nodded and followed him upstairs.
I looked a question at Ashdown, who frowned.
“Shotts is a maximum-security prison,” he said.
Chapter 21
TWELVE YEARS AGO
Can’t sleep. Neither can Tasha. Now that we’re lying in bed staring up at the ceiling, it seems foolish to have thought we might drift off.
In the darkness Tasha says softly, “This is the first night Hailey and I are apart. The first night since she was born.”
What do I say to that?
Seconds pass. I know the longer I remain silent, the longer she’ll dwell on that fact and the longer she dwells on it, the more pain she’ll feel.
Hell, maybe that’s what I want.
“We are going to find her,” I try.
I don’t know why I use the word we . We are not going to find her, not Tasha and I. We’re not even allowed to leave the house. At least that’s how we’ve been made to feel. If anyone’s going to find Hailey it’s Rendell and West or one of their people.
But Rendell and West went home for the day.
They’re sleeping, Special Agents Rendell and West.
I glance at the digital clock on my nightstand. It’s five A.M. Rendell and West have been sleeping for hours already. Maybe West had some difficulty. Maybe she rolled out of bed to check on her children once or twice. Maybe woke her husband to do it. Maybe she even invited her youngest into their bed as Tasha is wont to do when either of them is feeling frightened or sad or lonely. Maybe she eventually surrendered and swallowed a pill.
Maybe.
But she’s asleep by now, West is. In her bed. Head sunken into her soft pillow. Maybe dreaming. Maybe warding off nightmares. Nightmares of stolen children like Hailey. Nightmares of the ones she’s found; in her subconscious gone missing again. Nightmares of the ones she never found; in her subconscious found tortured or dead.
“Rendell will find her,” I say in order to silence my thoughts. “Rendell and West, they’ll find Hailey. I know they will.”
Quietly, Tasha scoffs. “They don’t even know Hailey.”
I force my eyes shut. “They know their job .”
“That’s not enough. They’re looking…”
I open my eyes. “They’re looking … what?”
“They’re looking in all the wrong places, Simon.”
I glance at her in the darkness, probably the first time I turn my head in her direction in hours. I can’t look at her in the light. I hate to admit it, even to myself, but it’s the truth. I can’t stomach to look at her. I can’t stomach to look at my own wife.
“What do you mean, ‘they’re looking in all the wrong places?’”
Not only am I ashamed but I’m afraid. I don’t want to hurt her. But for the first time in my life, I’m not sure I’ll be able to control the words that come out of my mouth. I’ll say something. Something subtle at first. And she’ll catch it because Tasha’s many things, but stupid isn’t one of them. And if she doesn’t catch it, I’ll keep at it, I know I will. In time I’ll openly blame her for Hailey’s disappearance. Because any way you look at it, it’s her fault, isn’t it? It’s Tasha’s fault Hailey is missing. Tasha’s fault my daughter’s not sleeping under my roof tonight. Tasha’s fault Hailey was …
Hailey was what?
Taken?
“All this bullshit,” she says softly, “about the abductor being someone we know, someone who lives in the area, it’s just statistics, right? And
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