his hasty words as he saw her amusement turn suddenly serious.
“I asked him to do it, Toshi-san. I was concerned about you.”
“I don’t understand,” he said. “I’m fine, aren’t I?” He felt a different kind of cold flow through him.
“Yes, Toshi-kun, you’re fine. Now.”
A shiver coursed down his spine as he realized what she’d just implied. He recalled how he’d found himself on deck rather than in his room.
“You really should eat,” she suggested. “Especially after all the trouble I’ve gone through—”
He could hear Miko’s mood growing lighter. Grateful for it, he reached for the food before him.
While he ate, Miko excused herself and left with the two used buckets of water. She returned within a few minutes carrying her koto. She sat down with it in a corner of the room and began to play a soothing melody.
He slowed his eating and watched the geisha play. As he did so, an image overrode his sight of her—it was one of a real woman, not the false one he could see on the Noh mask. Though it frightened him that he was doing this, since he knew not where the image had come from, he was loath to dismiss it. In a way, it pleased him greatly to believe the beautiful face was really hers.
“Is something wrong?” Miko asked. The image dissipated.
He felt a frown smooth out as she stopped playing. He wasn’t sure how to answer her question, especially as she continued studying him with her intense blue stare.
“I was just thinking about how—how beautiful you must have been before—” He stared at the floor, embarrassed by his admission.
“I thought you said you were only fifteen?”
He looked up at her question, not completely understanding it until he realized what kind of thoughts she had assumed had been his. Guiltily, though he’d done no such thing, he looked away, his cheeks growing hot.
Miko’s laughter filled the room, the sound of cascading silver bells adding to her ringing merriment. “You have thought of those types of things before, haven’t you, Toshi-kun?”
He stared at her, shocked she was asking him this. Swallowing hard, he opened his mouth to reply and found it had turned unusually dry. “I—”
Miko’s laughter filled the room again. “That’s nothing to be ashamed about. It’s only natural for strong, growing boys to have such thoughts. I’m sure you’ve even been the subject of such thoughts for many developing girls.”
“Miko-san!” The geisha’s mood had definitely improved from the day before, but he wasn’t sure he would survive it. With growing panic, he decided to change the subject. He brought up the first thing that popped into his mind. “Could I see you without the mask, Miko-san?”
Miko’s laughter dissipated. She stared at him with subdued amusement. “I would prefer not to do that, if you don’t mind,” she answered. “Are you finished with your meal?”
“But why not?” he pressed. “I’m used to you now. I know what to expect.”
She said nothing for a few moments. She rose from the floor and gathered his dishes. “I’ll be honest with you. While it’s true at first I wore this mask to ease your fears, I no longer wish to do without it. I realize it’s pure vanity, but I just can’t bring myself to destroy the illusion I’ve created for you. You aren’t like the rest of us here. You’re different. Unless you insist, I’d prefer for things to remain as they have been.”
He sighed, disgusted with himself. He would have done better if he’d been born without a tongue.
“I’m sorry, Miko-san. I didn’t mean—I just seem to do it all the time.” He looked away. “I’m really sorry.”
“Don’t worry about it,” she said brightly. “I don’t want you to change. It brings me great pleasure to know you feel comfortable enough with me to say or ask whatever is on your mind.”
“I—”
Miko reached over and placed two of her fingers across his lips.
“It’s all right!” She stared
“I asked him to do it, Toshi-san. I was concerned about you.”
“I don’t understand,” he said. “I’m fine, aren’t I?” He felt a different kind of cold flow through him.
“Yes, Toshi-kun, you’re fine. Now.”
A shiver coursed down his spine as he realized what she’d just implied. He recalled how he’d found himself on deck rather than in his room.
“You really should eat,” she suggested. “Especially after all the trouble I’ve gone through—”
He could hear Miko’s mood growing lighter. Grateful for it, he reached for the food before him.
While he ate, Miko excused herself and left with the two used buckets of water. She returned within a few minutes carrying her koto. She sat down with it in a corner of the room and began to play a soothing melody.
He slowed his eating and watched the geisha play. As he did so, an image overrode his sight of her—it was one of a real woman, not the false one he could see on the Noh mask. Though it frightened him that he was doing this, since he knew not where the image had come from, he was loath to dismiss it. In a way, it pleased him greatly to believe the beautiful face was really hers.
“Is something wrong?” Miko asked. The image dissipated.
He felt a frown smooth out as she stopped playing. He wasn’t sure how to answer her question, especially as she continued studying him with her intense blue stare.
“I was just thinking about how—how beautiful you must have been before—” He stared at the floor, embarrassed by his admission.
“I thought you said you were only fifteen?”
He looked up at her question, not completely understanding it until he realized what kind of thoughts she had assumed had been his. Guiltily, though he’d done no such thing, he looked away, his cheeks growing hot.
Miko’s laughter filled the room, the sound of cascading silver bells adding to her ringing merriment. “You have thought of those types of things before, haven’t you, Toshi-kun?”
He stared at her, shocked she was asking him this. Swallowing hard, he opened his mouth to reply and found it had turned unusually dry. “I—”
Miko’s laughter filled the room again. “That’s nothing to be ashamed about. It’s only natural for strong, growing boys to have such thoughts. I’m sure you’ve even been the subject of such thoughts for many developing girls.”
“Miko-san!” The geisha’s mood had definitely improved from the day before, but he wasn’t sure he would survive it. With growing panic, he decided to change the subject. He brought up the first thing that popped into his mind. “Could I see you without the mask, Miko-san?”
Miko’s laughter dissipated. She stared at him with subdued amusement. “I would prefer not to do that, if you don’t mind,” she answered. “Are you finished with your meal?”
“But why not?” he pressed. “I’m used to you now. I know what to expect.”
She said nothing for a few moments. She rose from the floor and gathered his dishes. “I’ll be honest with you. While it’s true at first I wore this mask to ease your fears, I no longer wish to do without it. I realize it’s pure vanity, but I just can’t bring myself to destroy the illusion I’ve created for you. You aren’t like the rest of us here. You’re different. Unless you insist, I’d prefer for things to remain as they have been.”
He sighed, disgusted with himself. He would have done better if he’d been born without a tongue.
“I’m sorry, Miko-san. I didn’t mean—I just seem to do it all the time.” He looked away. “I’m really sorry.”
“Don’t worry about it,” she said brightly. “I don’t want you to change. It brings me great pleasure to know you feel comfortable enough with me to say or ask whatever is on your mind.”
“I—”
Miko reached over and placed two of her fingers across his lips.
“It’s all right!” She stared
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