father…”
Belinda looked as if she’d been slapped. Fleur felt sick. She rushed to her mother. “It’s all right. I’m sorry!”
“How could you?” Belinda’s voice was almost a whisper. “Does one meeting with him make you forget everything?”
Fleur shook her head miserably. “No. No, I haven’t forgotten anything.”
“Come upstairs with me,” Belinda said stonily. “Now.”
“Go with your mother, chérie. ” His voice slid between them like silk. “We will have time to talk after the funeral tomorrow and make plans for your future.”
His words gave her a sweet, fluttery sensation that felt like a betrayal.
Belinda stood at her bedroom window looking through the trees at the headlights flickering past on the Rue de la Bienfaisance. Muddy mascara tears trickled down her cheeks and dripped onto the lapels of her ice-blue robe. In the next room, Fleur slept. Flynn had died without ever knowing about her.
Belinda was only thirty-five, but she felt like an old woman. She wouldn’t let Alexi steal her beautiful baby away. No matter what she had to do. She stumbled over to the stereo. An hour ago, she’d made a phone call. She couldn’t think what else to do. As she looked around for her drink, she knew that, after tonight, there couldn’t be any more.
Her glass sat on the floor next to the pile of record albums. She crouched in the midst of them and picked up the album that lay on top. The soundtrack from the Western Devil Slaughter . She stared at the picture on the cover.
Jake Koranda. Actor and playwright. Devil Slaughter was the second of his Bird Dog Caliber movies. She loved them both, even if the critics didn’t. They said Jake wasprostituting his talent by appearing in junk, but she didn’t feel that way.
The cover photo depicted the movie’s opening scene. Jake, as Bird Dog Caliber, stared into the camera, his face dirt-creased and weary; his soft, sulky mouth slack, almost ugly. Pearl-handled Colt revolvers gleamed at his sides. She leaned back, shut her eyes, and reached for the fantasies that made her feel better. Gradually the sounds of the distant cars slipped away until she could only hear his breathing and feel his hands on her breasts.
Yes, Jake. Oh yes. Oh yes, my darling, Jimmy.
The record album slipped from her fingers, jarring her back to reality. She reached for her crumpled pack of cigarettes, but it was empty. She’d meant to send someone out after dinner, but she’d forgotten. Everything was slipping away from her. Everything except the daughter she’d never let go.
She heard the sound she’d been waiting for, Alexi’s footsteps on the stairs. She splashed more scotch in her glass and carried it out into the hallway. Alexi’s face looked drawn. His newest teenage mistress must have worn him out. She walked toward him, her robe slipping over one naked shoulder.
“You’re drunk,” he said.
“Just a little.” An ice cube clinked dully against the side of her glass. “Just enough so I can talk to you.”
“Go to bed, Belinda. I’m too tired to satisfy you tonight.”
“I only want a cigarette.”
Watching her carefully, he drew out his silver case and opened it. She took her time pulling one out, then stepped past him into his bedroom. Alexi followed her. “I don’t remember inviting you in.”
“Pardon me for entering kiddieland,” she retorted.
“Go away, Belinda. Unlike my mistresses, you’re old and ugly. You’ve become a desperate woman who knows she has nothing fresh to bargain with.”
She couldn’t let his words hurt her. She had to concentrate on the awful obscenity of his mouth covering Fleur’s lips. “I won’t let you have my daughter.”
“ Your daughter?” He took off his jacket and tossed it over a chair. “Don’t you mean our daughter?”
“I’ll kill you if you touch her.”
“ Bon Dieu, chérie. Your drinking has finally driven you over the edge.” His cuff links clanked on the bureau as he discarded
Belinda looked as if she’d been slapped. Fleur felt sick. She rushed to her mother. “It’s all right. I’m sorry!”
“How could you?” Belinda’s voice was almost a whisper. “Does one meeting with him make you forget everything?”
Fleur shook her head miserably. “No. No, I haven’t forgotten anything.”
“Come upstairs with me,” Belinda said stonily. “Now.”
“Go with your mother, chérie. ” His voice slid between them like silk. “We will have time to talk after the funeral tomorrow and make plans for your future.”
His words gave her a sweet, fluttery sensation that felt like a betrayal.
Belinda stood at her bedroom window looking through the trees at the headlights flickering past on the Rue de la Bienfaisance. Muddy mascara tears trickled down her cheeks and dripped onto the lapels of her ice-blue robe. In the next room, Fleur slept. Flynn had died without ever knowing about her.
Belinda was only thirty-five, but she felt like an old woman. She wouldn’t let Alexi steal her beautiful baby away. No matter what she had to do. She stumbled over to the stereo. An hour ago, she’d made a phone call. She couldn’t think what else to do. As she looked around for her drink, she knew that, after tonight, there couldn’t be any more.
Her glass sat on the floor next to the pile of record albums. She crouched in the midst of them and picked up the album that lay on top. The soundtrack from the Western Devil Slaughter . She stared at the picture on the cover.
Jake Koranda. Actor and playwright. Devil Slaughter was the second of his Bird Dog Caliber movies. She loved them both, even if the critics didn’t. They said Jake wasprostituting his talent by appearing in junk, but she didn’t feel that way.
The cover photo depicted the movie’s opening scene. Jake, as Bird Dog Caliber, stared into the camera, his face dirt-creased and weary; his soft, sulky mouth slack, almost ugly. Pearl-handled Colt revolvers gleamed at his sides. She leaned back, shut her eyes, and reached for the fantasies that made her feel better. Gradually the sounds of the distant cars slipped away until she could only hear his breathing and feel his hands on her breasts.
Yes, Jake. Oh yes. Oh yes, my darling, Jimmy.
The record album slipped from her fingers, jarring her back to reality. She reached for her crumpled pack of cigarettes, but it was empty. She’d meant to send someone out after dinner, but she’d forgotten. Everything was slipping away from her. Everything except the daughter she’d never let go.
She heard the sound she’d been waiting for, Alexi’s footsteps on the stairs. She splashed more scotch in her glass and carried it out into the hallway. Alexi’s face looked drawn. His newest teenage mistress must have worn him out. She walked toward him, her robe slipping over one naked shoulder.
“You’re drunk,” he said.
“Just a little.” An ice cube clinked dully against the side of her glass. “Just enough so I can talk to you.”
“Go to bed, Belinda. I’m too tired to satisfy you tonight.”
“I only want a cigarette.”
Watching her carefully, he drew out his silver case and opened it. She took her time pulling one out, then stepped past him into his bedroom. Alexi followed her. “I don’t remember inviting you in.”
“Pardon me for entering kiddieland,” she retorted.
“Go away, Belinda. Unlike my mistresses, you’re old and ugly. You’ve become a desperate woman who knows she has nothing fresh to bargain with.”
She couldn’t let his words hurt her. She had to concentrate on the awful obscenity of his mouth covering Fleur’s lips. “I won’t let you have my daughter.”
“ Your daughter?” He took off his jacket and tossed it over a chair. “Don’t you mean our daughter?”
“I’ll kill you if you touch her.”
“ Bon Dieu, chérie. Your drinking has finally driven you over the edge.” His cuff links clanked on the bureau as he discarded
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