to toe and breathe him in.
David bit back a laugh as they listened to the stranger pee at the urinal, and Isaac pressed his lips to David’s cheek. It felt so right being together again. He knew they had problems they needed to face, but there was a sense of certainty growing deep inside him that felt sturdy and right. A certainty that despite whatever mistakes they made, this thing between them was solid and sure, rooted deep into the earth like the roots of a tree. No matter what happened, they’d face it together.
As the man left the bathroom, David smiled tentatively. “What?”
“Nothing. Everything.” Isaac realized he was smiling. “We’re okay. We’re still here. They can’t change that. No one can change that if we don’t let them.” He shook his head. “I’m probably not making any sense.”
“You are.” David kissed Isaac’s forehead. “We won’t let them. Not anyone.”
For a minute, they just held each other, and Isaac closed his eyes as he rubbed his cheek against the soft flannel of David’s shirt. “I guess we should go. I want to talk to Aaron.” He raised his head.
With a smile, David ran his thumb over Isaac’s lower lip. “Do you think you can get away tonight? Meet me in the woods by June’s. Can you take Silver?”
“Yes. I’ll find a way. Midnight.”
They kissed again, and slipped back out into the hall. Aaron was saying something to their stony-faced parents by the door to Nathan’s room. The warmth he’d gained from the peaceful, giddy respite with David vanished, and Isaac kept his own eyes on the floor now. David was right. If they weren’t careful everyone would see, and Isaac didn’t want to even imagine what would happen then.
#
It was late afternoon by the time Isaac approached the Miller farm. The old buggy jostled him as a wheel caught a spring pothole, and he reined in Silver by John Miller’s house. Mervin’s older brother was likely out in the fields, and as Isaac climbed down from the buggy, he spotted John’s wife in the kitchen window. She didn’t wave, but he lifted a hand anyway.
John’s house had been built a few hundred yards from his parents’ home, and as Isaac approached, memories rolled through his mind. He and Mervin with muddy knees being scolded by Mrs. Miller, who still gave them sugar cookies even though they always ran and never walked.
Isaac stopped in his tracks, the fear gnawing at him outweighing the urge to see his best friend again. Mervin was probably still out in the fields anyway, and maybe that was best. He scuffed his shoe in the dirt, feeling curious eyes on him, but seeing no one. His face flushed, and he realized he looked like an idiot just standing there. He had to stay or go. Just turn around and—
“Isaac Byler.” Jacob Miller’s voice rang out from the direction of the barn. He strode over, wiping his hands on an old cloth. Isaac forced his feet to move and meet Jacob. They stopped a few feet from each other. Beneath his black hat, Jacob had Mervin’s fine reddish hair, but he was taller and leaner.
Isaac extended his hand. “Hello, Jacob.”
After a heartbeat, Jacob took it, squeezing hard. “Isaac. What do you want?” Jacob exhaled through his nose. “I mean…what brings you here? We heard you were back, but Mervin didn’t seem to think you’d come by.”
It shouldn’t have hurt, but his stomach clenched like he’d been kicked by a mule. “I…oh. I can leave if you want. I just wanted to see how you all are.” I wanted to see if my best friend hates me.
“We’re fine. Working hard and living by God’s word, as it should be.”
“How are Ruth and Atlee?” The last time he’d been here, it had been their wedding day.
“Well. The new baby is due soon.”
“Good. That’s…good.” Jacob was only a couple years older than Mervin, and they’d all played together countless times when they were boys. But now Isaac had no idea what to say.
After a few moments of silence, Jacob
David bit back a laugh as they listened to the stranger pee at the urinal, and Isaac pressed his lips to David’s cheek. It felt so right being together again. He knew they had problems they needed to face, but there was a sense of certainty growing deep inside him that felt sturdy and right. A certainty that despite whatever mistakes they made, this thing between them was solid and sure, rooted deep into the earth like the roots of a tree. No matter what happened, they’d face it together.
As the man left the bathroom, David smiled tentatively. “What?”
“Nothing. Everything.” Isaac realized he was smiling. “We’re okay. We’re still here. They can’t change that. No one can change that if we don’t let them.” He shook his head. “I’m probably not making any sense.”
“You are.” David kissed Isaac’s forehead. “We won’t let them. Not anyone.”
For a minute, they just held each other, and Isaac closed his eyes as he rubbed his cheek against the soft flannel of David’s shirt. “I guess we should go. I want to talk to Aaron.” He raised his head.
With a smile, David ran his thumb over Isaac’s lower lip. “Do you think you can get away tonight? Meet me in the woods by June’s. Can you take Silver?”
“Yes. I’ll find a way. Midnight.”
They kissed again, and slipped back out into the hall. Aaron was saying something to their stony-faced parents by the door to Nathan’s room. The warmth he’d gained from the peaceful, giddy respite with David vanished, and Isaac kept his own eyes on the floor now. David was right. If they weren’t careful everyone would see, and Isaac didn’t want to even imagine what would happen then.
#
It was late afternoon by the time Isaac approached the Miller farm. The old buggy jostled him as a wheel caught a spring pothole, and he reined in Silver by John Miller’s house. Mervin’s older brother was likely out in the fields, and as Isaac climbed down from the buggy, he spotted John’s wife in the kitchen window. She didn’t wave, but he lifted a hand anyway.
John’s house had been built a few hundred yards from his parents’ home, and as Isaac approached, memories rolled through his mind. He and Mervin with muddy knees being scolded by Mrs. Miller, who still gave them sugar cookies even though they always ran and never walked.
Isaac stopped in his tracks, the fear gnawing at him outweighing the urge to see his best friend again. Mervin was probably still out in the fields anyway, and maybe that was best. He scuffed his shoe in the dirt, feeling curious eyes on him, but seeing no one. His face flushed, and he realized he looked like an idiot just standing there. He had to stay or go. Just turn around and—
“Isaac Byler.” Jacob Miller’s voice rang out from the direction of the barn. He strode over, wiping his hands on an old cloth. Isaac forced his feet to move and meet Jacob. They stopped a few feet from each other. Beneath his black hat, Jacob had Mervin’s fine reddish hair, but he was taller and leaner.
Isaac extended his hand. “Hello, Jacob.”
After a heartbeat, Jacob took it, squeezing hard. “Isaac. What do you want?” Jacob exhaled through his nose. “I mean…what brings you here? We heard you were back, but Mervin didn’t seem to think you’d come by.”
It shouldn’t have hurt, but his stomach clenched like he’d been kicked by a mule. “I…oh. I can leave if you want. I just wanted to see how you all are.” I wanted to see if my best friend hates me.
“We’re fine. Working hard and living by God’s word, as it should be.”
“How are Ruth and Atlee?” The last time he’d been here, it had been their wedding day.
“Well. The new baby is due soon.”
“Good. That’s…good.” Jacob was only a couple years older than Mervin, and they’d all played together countless times when they were boys. But now Isaac had no idea what to say.
After a few moments of silence, Jacob
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