First Chair by Nikki Hoff Page B

queens. She wanted the best.
    And she would get it too.
    The door opened slightly, and concertmaster Felix Yeomans walked in. His black, thinning hair was parted on the side to give the illusion of a head of thick hair. She stood, and towered over him. His head came up to her chest, and many a times during rehearsals, she had caught him staring at her breasts while she was talking to him. She didn’t mind men ogling her. After all, she was a beautiful and desirable woman.
    Today, he looked at her face, his eyes boring into hers with intensity. “That was well-played, Christina.”
    “Thank you.” She longed to hear the next words that would escape his lips. Oh! How she yearned to be given the honor of being first chair. Her breath came out in small gasps as she waited for him to deliver the precious words.
    “You’ve been working hard,” he said. “And it’s truly a delight to work with someone who is as dedicated and committed as you are. I can see a bright future ahead of you.”
    “It’s an honor to be in your orchestra.” And it would be an even bigger honor to be the first chair. She imagined taking her position at the head of the cello section. The exciting moment when the spotlight would fall upon her as she would perform a solo number; it would be glorious beyond belief.
    “You did good today on the stage but there was a moment, a slight tremor of your hand that betrayed you, Christina.”
    The fall to reality was fast, hard and painful.  She couldn’t deny it. “It was a mistake that I immediately rectified.”
    He nodded. “Nonetheless, Christina. I can’t imagine giving over the first chair to someone who isn’t quite ready yet. Apart from that one mistake, I find you didn’t play with your heart.” He waved his hand, his stubby fingers moving as if he was conducting a symphony. “There is a fire inside you, but it’s not passionate enough. You need to find that passion, Christina.”
    “What are you saying?” She hated the slight tremor in her voice.
    “I’m afraid you’re not ready to shoulder the responsibility of the first chair as yet, Christina. I’m going to hire Roger. You remember him? He played as guest cellist two months ago. He is willing to take on the job.”
    “You can’t…” She took in a deep breath even as her world came crashing around. She felt faint, lightheaded. This was a nightmare. “I want another chance. Give me another audition. I will bring out that fire, that passion you want, Felix.”
    “That wouldn’t be fair, Christina.” He licked his bottom lip as his gaze drifted to her breasts. “You’ve had your chance.”
    “There is nothing I wouldn’t do for this position, Felix.” Tears pooled into her eyes. “I’ve worked hard for so long and now you’re saying…”
    Putting his hand on her arm, he patted her as one would do to a child. “There, there, dear! Don’t cry now. You’ll get your chance next year. You can try again for this position.”
    A year? She couldn’t wait for a year. She was ready now. This was supposed to be her moment, her foray into success. Felix walked out, and she crashed on the chair. This couldn’t be happening to her. Tears spilled down her cheeks as she sobbed, her heart broken, crushed into dust.
    How could this have happened? What had she done to deserve such a devastating failure? What was she going to do now? Had she made the wrong career choice? Should she have carried on with her dance? Perhaps she would have fared better at it. It was too late now. She’d made the choice long ago – and there was nothing else to do but to stick to her guns.
    For there was one thing Christina didn’t know, and that was to give up. If there was a way to get that coveted position, she would find a way to get it.
     
    ~~~
    As she rang the bell for Felix’s apartment in the evening, Christina wondered if she had indeed lost her mind. What made her think she would be able to convince him to give her another chance? But she