Fire With Fire by Jenny Han, Siobhan Vivian Page A

fine,” but I don’t believe him. He looks like
he’s in serious pain. I can see it all over his face. His teeth
clench as he bends over to check his black soft cast and adjust
the Velcro straps.
“Should, um, I get someone to help you?” I take a step
back and give him some room. I hope I haven’t messed up any
of the progress he’s made in the pool.
“No, don’t,” he says, quiet. Reeve pushes a hand through
his hair, composing himself. He says with a groan, “It’s my
own fault for coming to this stupid maze anyway.” He reaches
for his crutches, slides them under his arms.
I can tell he’s about to walk away from me, but I don’t
want him to. I’m not ready for this moment to be over. Not
yet. It’s like when we rode the ferry together. I’d wish and
wish and wish the ride could last a little bit longer. Even a
minute longer.
I reach out and touch his arm. His shirt is so unbelievably
soft, and I feel his bicep underneath. It’s big and tight and cut,
probably from the weeks he’s spent on crutches. I say, “I’m
so sorry you got hurt at the dance.” And despite everything
Reeve did to me, it feels good to apologize. Because I truly
did not mean for him to be hurt so bad that his whole life
might be screwed up.
He shrugs his shoulders. “Shit happens, you know?”
“Yup,” I say, nodding, because it is true. “Shit happens.” It
happens to all of us.
There’s an awkward second, where neither of us knows
what to say. Reeve rustles his hand through his hair. “I should
go find my friends. Hope you make it out of here alive.” He
positions his crutches and goes to take a step forward, but I
shift my body so he can’t. It gives me a surge of adrenaline.
Put myself out there. That was Kat’s advice.
What do I have to lose?
“It’s, um, been a long time, huh?” The words get kind of
caught up in my throat.
Reeve’s head falls slightly to the side. “Yeah . . .”
The wind picks up and blows my hair around. I tuck as
much as I can behind my ears. “I’ve always wondered if you
ever thought about what happened.” Reeve lets out an awkward laugh and then blinks a few times. I can’t tell if he’s
embarrassed or blindsided. “If you felt bad about what you
did. I hoped so, anyway.”
And then I hold my breath, because it’s the perfect opening.
I’m giving him the best shot to apologize to me, to finally take
responsibility for his actions. To make things right between
us, once and for all.
Reeve’s eyes narrow in confusion. He’s trying to place me.
Which throws me off. Sure, I’m wearing a Halloween costume, but it’s weird. It took him five seconds to call me Big
Easy at the dance. Does he really not recognize me now?
“I mean, calling someone Big Easy? Making everyone at
Montessori hate them? I know people say middle school is
the worst, but you took the cake on that one.” Reeve’s whole
body stiffens, and he stares at me hard, this time with cold
eyes. I feel him peeling back the layers I’ve got on. The
makeup, the pink hair extensions, the crazy outfit, until I’m
stripped clean to the bone. I’m shaking. Shaking like a leaf in
the wind. “Aren’t you sorry? Even a little bit?”
He wets his lips and growls, “Go fuck yourself.” The three
words come out like they are sentences. Punches.
Tears fill my eyes, and I worry my legs might give out
underneath me, as Reeve pushes past me and down the long
corridor.
“I’m sorry,” I call after him. I don’t even know why. But
I immediately hate myself for saying it. Twice. Because those
are the words I deserve to hear. Not him. Only I’ll never get
an apology from Reeve, because he isn’t sorry.
Not one little bit.
And then I feel it coming. A tidal wave. A tsunami. The
surge inside of me. Anger, sadness. Like on homecoming
night. I close my eyes, but I don’t see darkness. I see the hay
maze lighting up, walls of fire penning in all these people.
Oh God, oh God.
I have to get out of here before I explode.
CHAP
TER