help.”
“Well, they can’t help much. They’ve got Virginia in school too, and then the boys and Spring to take care of.”
“That’s it, in a nutshell. You make your own way. So you make your own decisions.”
“Well . . . ”
“No, I admire you for it. You study what you want to study, chart your own path. When I think about it, it’s the only way to be happy.”
“Okay.”
“So, like I said, I’ve been thinking. I’ve been wondering what the hell I’m doing at the University of Dayton anyway. Why do I care so much about going back there? I hate business classes. I don’t want to be an accountant or an insurance salesman or a banker. So, why am I busting my ass to do something I hate?”
“You can study other things there.”
“I know. I just think maybe I need to start over. I mean, why did I go there to begin with? To please Mom and Dad? Why should I worry about pleasing them when they’re too wound up in their own problems to give a damn about me anyway.”
“I’m sure they love you, James.” She hugged him tightly. “You’re very lovable.”
He smiled in the dark and could feel the air around him grow warm, but the warmth faded as his smile did.
“Maybe it’s not in the cards for me to go back at all.”
Laurel leaned up on one elbow. “Quit school? You want to quit school? In the middle of your junior year?”
“Maybe.”
“What will you do instead?”
He shrugged. “Anything I want. For the first time in my life, I feel free — like my life is in my own hands. Maybe I’ll backpack through Europe. Maybe I’ll go to Nashville and write songs. I don’t know. I can go anywhere — do anything. You know, the more I think about it, the more I think this may be the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”
She bit her lip, deep in thought. “Perhaps.”
He stopped to gauge her reaction. Even in the darkness, he could feel the wary look, the stiff posture of her body. A sudden realization dawned on him.
“I won’t leave you behind, Laurel — not in a million years. I want you to come with me.”
“But I’m in the middle of my first year in college. I can’t just pick up and go.” Distress colored her voice.
“Well, you can finish your first year. I’ll go ahead to wherever, get settled — and then you could transfer. People do it all the time.”
“But Benton College has what I want to study.”
“Lots of places have art programs, sweetheart.”
“But I can’t do work-study lots of places.”
“We can work something out. Don’t worry. I’ll find a way for us to be together.”
She lay down on her back, beside him, facing the ceiling. His side felt cold without her against him, and he rolled closer to her, resting a hand on her tummy and sliding it to her hip. He tugged her toward him.
“Let’s not talk about it anymore right now. We have lots of time to work out details and talk about things. Right now I just want to be with you.”
“Okay.” She seemed relieved to be changing the subject and he couldn’t blame her. Why wallow in consternation when there was so much else to do?
“Come back Mountain Laurel.” He kissed her shoulder. She wiggled around, until she was nestled with her back against his chest and brought his arm around her. She cradled it in her own two arms and kissed his hand. “I’m here.”
Silence fell over the house, each of them lost in their own thoughts. Finally, he spoke again. “I’m going to Nashville, I think. If I want to try my hand at music, that’s the place — either that or California. But I think Nashville’s more our speed.”
“I suppose.”
“It will take me a few weeks to get everything together, but I’m going to use my savings to relocate.”
“What will you do once you get there?” Laurel’s voice was soft and unsure.
“At first?” He kissed the back of her head and grinned. “Wait tables, probably. Then, start trying to make some connections with musicians in the area.”
“It
“Well, they can’t help much. They’ve got Virginia in school too, and then the boys and Spring to take care of.”
“That’s it, in a nutshell. You make your own way. So you make your own decisions.”
“Well . . . ”
“No, I admire you for it. You study what you want to study, chart your own path. When I think about it, it’s the only way to be happy.”
“Okay.”
“So, like I said, I’ve been thinking. I’ve been wondering what the hell I’m doing at the University of Dayton anyway. Why do I care so much about going back there? I hate business classes. I don’t want to be an accountant or an insurance salesman or a banker. So, why am I busting my ass to do something I hate?”
“You can study other things there.”
“I know. I just think maybe I need to start over. I mean, why did I go there to begin with? To please Mom and Dad? Why should I worry about pleasing them when they’re too wound up in their own problems to give a damn about me anyway.”
“I’m sure they love you, James.” She hugged him tightly. “You’re very lovable.”
He smiled in the dark and could feel the air around him grow warm, but the warmth faded as his smile did.
“Maybe it’s not in the cards for me to go back at all.”
Laurel leaned up on one elbow. “Quit school? You want to quit school? In the middle of your junior year?”
“Maybe.”
“What will you do instead?”
He shrugged. “Anything I want. For the first time in my life, I feel free — like my life is in my own hands. Maybe I’ll backpack through Europe. Maybe I’ll go to Nashville and write songs. I don’t know. I can go anywhere — do anything. You know, the more I think about it, the more I think this may be the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”
She bit her lip, deep in thought. “Perhaps.”
He stopped to gauge her reaction. Even in the darkness, he could feel the wary look, the stiff posture of her body. A sudden realization dawned on him.
“I won’t leave you behind, Laurel — not in a million years. I want you to come with me.”
“But I’m in the middle of my first year in college. I can’t just pick up and go.” Distress colored her voice.
“Well, you can finish your first year. I’ll go ahead to wherever, get settled — and then you could transfer. People do it all the time.”
“But Benton College has what I want to study.”
“Lots of places have art programs, sweetheart.”
“But I can’t do work-study lots of places.”
“We can work something out. Don’t worry. I’ll find a way for us to be together.”
She lay down on her back, beside him, facing the ceiling. His side felt cold without her against him, and he rolled closer to her, resting a hand on her tummy and sliding it to her hip. He tugged her toward him.
“Let’s not talk about it anymore right now. We have lots of time to work out details and talk about things. Right now I just want to be with you.”
“Okay.” She seemed relieved to be changing the subject and he couldn’t blame her. Why wallow in consternation when there was so much else to do?
“Come back Mountain Laurel.” He kissed her shoulder. She wiggled around, until she was nestled with her back against his chest and brought his arm around her. She cradled it in her own two arms and kissed his hand. “I’m here.”
Silence fell over the house, each of them lost in their own thoughts. Finally, he spoke again. “I’m going to Nashville, I think. If I want to try my hand at music, that’s the place — either that or California. But I think Nashville’s more our speed.”
“I suppose.”
“It will take me a few weeks to get everything together, but I’m going to use my savings to relocate.”
“What will you do once you get there?” Laurel’s voice was soft and unsure.
“At first?” He kissed the back of her head and grinned. “Wait tables, probably. Then, start trying to make some connections with musicians in the area.”
“It
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