Fighting to Forget by Jenika Snow Page B

wrinkled up her nose, and shook her head. “Are you kidding me?  I was never one of those people that liked sappy romances, but I couldn’t find anything else on.”
    He grinned. She was certainly a woman after his heart. His thoughts went to why he’d really called her over here tonight. The somberness in his body went to anxiousness, and he couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt like that. It was strange to feel so vulnerable with a woman when he’d kept himself strong for so long. But Tasha had opened his eyes, opened his heart, and he wanted, no, needed, to be honest with the woman he loved.
    “You’re thinking about something serious. I can tell,” she said, and he felt her gaze on him.
    “How about we have that talk?” He turned on the couch, kept her close, but stared at her in the eyes, hoping she saw the seriousness in his expression.
    “Okay,” she said softly.
    It took him a while to see how he’d proceed with this, but he knew he had to, knew he had to be open and honest, and see where the cards landed. They couldn’t fully move forward unless he came clean with his past. Tasha was his life now. He knew that and felt it in the very recesses of his soul.
    He touched the scar on his neck, watched as she lowered her gaze and stared at him as he did the act, and all the memories from his past came rushing back. But it wasn’t an unpleasant sensation. In fact, he felt this freeing emotion consume him at the fact he was finally going to tell someone. Sure, everyone who’d read the paper or watched the news back then knew about his past and the murder, but he’d never actually spoken the words to anyone. He kept it in, deep inside of him, and lived with that.
    “Over a decade ago I was married.” He paused, kept his eyes trained on Tasha, and tried to gauge her reaction.
    “Go on,” she said softly, placed a hand over his, and smiled.
    “I was married over ten years ago, loved Melanie so damn much, and thought I’d start a family with her.” He didn’t know how it would make Tasha feel with him saying that, but he wanted her to know that part of his life. “I was in the MMA, competing in my last fight with a man named Haines, and I beat him. I got the championship title, and was ready to retire and finally give Melanie the attention I’d neglected while I was in the fighting scene.”
    She breathed in and out softly, and as he stared at her face, he didn’t see any discomfort at where this conversation was going, but only open and honest acceptance.
    “I came home after the championship to see Haines had raped and murdered Melanie.”
    She gasped, covered her mouth, and he saw her eyes grow large and watery. “I am so sorry.”
    He shook his head, knowing she meant her sympathy, but needing to get this out.
    “I’ve never told anyone about any of this. But they knew. Everyone knew because it was national news, made headlines, and it rocked the Absinthe MMA.” He looked at the TV that had since been muted. He saw the couple embrace, the man cupping the woman’s face, and the love on their expressions.
    “I would have been too young to have seen that in the news.”
    He looked at her again and nodded. Larson took her hand in his, stared down at her delicate fingers, at the way her fingernails were painted this soft pink color, and how she was so fragile compared to him. No one in the training facility talked about his past. They knew better, so it wasn’t like Tasha could have heard anything there.
    “Yeah, I figured as much, but I’m glad you didn’t hear about it.” He continued to look at her hands. “It was gruesome and grisly, and I’d hate for you to have that memory, even if it was part of my life.” His heart was beating so fast it felt like it was going to burst through his chest. “But Haines attacked me at the house. I hadn’t known he was there, and when I went after him, so consumed and blinded by my rage, I was sloppy in my actions. He cut me.” He let go of