neck.
“I should have died.” His features hardened with such deep, impenetrable anger, he was almost unrecognizable as the stoic doctor I’d come to know. He released his collar and relaxed his neck, turning his head back in my direction but not meeting my eyes.
He swallowed before expounding, “She and I were what our kind consider to be ‘true mates.’ I should have died soon after she did.”
I could hear the self-loathing in his voice, smell the bitterness he clung to. But worst of all was his unbearable longing. It was palpable. And I knew without question he had wanted to die. Perhaps he still did?
“I’m so sorry. When did she …? How … how long ago?”
“It’s been ninety-eight years, three months, and fourteen days since she passed,” he answered seamlessly.
Wow. “I’m … so sorry. You … you really loved her,” I assessed inanely, finding myself at a loss for what to say.
“I still love her.” His eyes returned to mine, hard and unflinching. “I will only ever love her.”
I gulped. “I’m sorry,” I repeated like a mantra, “so sorry …”
He seemed to snap out of it then, his mien of anger and resentment finally cracking, giving way to his usual countenance of stoicism.
“Don’t”—he sighed—“don’t apologize. We all have our curses to bear. I shouldn’t be burdening you with mine.”
“Do you … uh … know why? Why you survived the loss of your mate when most other werewolves don’t?” It was a horridly insensitive question to ask, but given my potential mate situation with Alex, I had to know.
“Not most,” he corrected, “all other werewolves don’t. And no. No one knows why. I’m the great anomaly of our mated species. A freak of nature, as Lessa put it.”
“No, you’re not.”
He shrugged. “I’m hardly normal.”
“Maybe you’re better than normal?”
He smiled weakly, but his eyes were still sad. Empty. I realized now that they had always been empty. While his physical body might have endured, clearly a part of Kai had died with his mate.
“You’re a sweet girl, Milena.” I felt his warm, dry palm land atop my bare knee. “Don’t let the blood curse change you. Hold onto your humanity.”
I didn’t understand what he meant by that, but by the time I’d regained my bearings enough to request clarification, he’d already collected his things and left.
As I replayed our interaction in my head, I wondered what in the world had gotten into me. I’d been a breath away from throwing myself at Kai before he’d doused the flames of my wantonness by bringing up his dead wife! What had I been thinking?
And why in God’s name was I suddenly feeling so horny?
***
I moped around Alcaeus’ house for a bit, searching from room to room until I found Guadalupe in an upstairs sitting room, crying her eyes out watching episodes of Avenida Brasil on DVD. She explained it was the story of a girl seeking revenge on her mother for abandoning her as a child to live in a landfill. She was quick to point out it was also a love story, though, as the girl had met the hunky love of her life in said landfill.
Hmm. I’d barely grasped the plot lines of the few American soap operas I’d ever attempted to watch. This one sounded well over my head.
When I asked her if I might help out with anything around the house, she said I could help by eating lunch with her just as soon as the episode she was watching was over.
As the Brazilian soap opera played out on the small screen in front of me, I saw none of it, my mind drifting to thoughts of Alex, wondering where he was and what he was doing. I couldn’t smell him anywhere in the house. I kept picturing him in my memory as he’d looked in Alcaeus’ study when he’d gently encouraged me to throw him through more walls. My she-wolf had found that particular offer of his terribly romantic.
I was so fucked.
CHAPTER SEVEN
I ate steak for lunch, resigned to the fact my days as a vegetarian were
“I should have died.” His features hardened with such deep, impenetrable anger, he was almost unrecognizable as the stoic doctor I’d come to know. He released his collar and relaxed his neck, turning his head back in my direction but not meeting my eyes.
He swallowed before expounding, “She and I were what our kind consider to be ‘true mates.’ I should have died soon after she did.”
I could hear the self-loathing in his voice, smell the bitterness he clung to. But worst of all was his unbearable longing. It was palpable. And I knew without question he had wanted to die. Perhaps he still did?
“I’m so sorry. When did she …? How … how long ago?”
“It’s been ninety-eight years, three months, and fourteen days since she passed,” he answered seamlessly.
Wow. “I’m … so sorry. You … you really loved her,” I assessed inanely, finding myself at a loss for what to say.
“I still love her.” His eyes returned to mine, hard and unflinching. “I will only ever love her.”
I gulped. “I’m sorry,” I repeated like a mantra, “so sorry …”
He seemed to snap out of it then, his mien of anger and resentment finally cracking, giving way to his usual countenance of stoicism.
“Don’t”—he sighed—“don’t apologize. We all have our curses to bear. I shouldn’t be burdening you with mine.”
“Do you … uh … know why? Why you survived the loss of your mate when most other werewolves don’t?” It was a horridly insensitive question to ask, but given my potential mate situation with Alex, I had to know.
“Not most,” he corrected, “all other werewolves don’t. And no. No one knows why. I’m the great anomaly of our mated species. A freak of nature, as Lessa put it.”
“No, you’re not.”
He shrugged. “I’m hardly normal.”
“Maybe you’re better than normal?”
He smiled weakly, but his eyes were still sad. Empty. I realized now that they had always been empty. While his physical body might have endured, clearly a part of Kai had died with his mate.
“You’re a sweet girl, Milena.” I felt his warm, dry palm land atop my bare knee. “Don’t let the blood curse change you. Hold onto your humanity.”
I didn’t understand what he meant by that, but by the time I’d regained my bearings enough to request clarification, he’d already collected his things and left.
As I replayed our interaction in my head, I wondered what in the world had gotten into me. I’d been a breath away from throwing myself at Kai before he’d doused the flames of my wantonness by bringing up his dead wife! What had I been thinking?
And why in God’s name was I suddenly feeling so horny?
***
I moped around Alcaeus’ house for a bit, searching from room to room until I found Guadalupe in an upstairs sitting room, crying her eyes out watching episodes of Avenida Brasil on DVD. She explained it was the story of a girl seeking revenge on her mother for abandoning her as a child to live in a landfill. She was quick to point out it was also a love story, though, as the girl had met the hunky love of her life in said landfill.
Hmm. I’d barely grasped the plot lines of the few American soap operas I’d ever attempted to watch. This one sounded well over my head.
When I asked her if I might help out with anything around the house, she said I could help by eating lunch with her just as soon as the episode she was watching was over.
As the Brazilian soap opera played out on the small screen in front of me, I saw none of it, my mind drifting to thoughts of Alex, wondering where he was and what he was doing. I couldn’t smell him anywhere in the house. I kept picturing him in my memory as he’d looked in Alcaeus’ study when he’d gently encouraged me to throw him through more walls. My she-wolf had found that particular offer of his terribly romantic.
I was so fucked.
CHAPTER SEVEN
I ate steak for lunch, resigned to the fact my days as a vegetarian were
Similar Books
