Falling From Disgrace by L Maretta Page A

Vicodin.  I took them just as I should at first, maybe four a day to manage the pain, and that worked for a while.  Then taking one every four hours wasn’t enough and so I’d take two every four hours.  Then I’d take two every three hours. 
     
    “In the middle of this I was still extremely depressed over what happened.  I graduated Northwestern before the accident but I never went back for med school, I never got a job, and just stayed in my parents’ house all day long.  I couldn’t take the looks people would give me when I left the house so I became a hermit and closed myself off.  I soon realized that when I took the pills the depression lifted for a bit, too.  My parents started to notice I was taking too many and so they kept a more careful eye on me and I took less again.  The depression got worse and so I thought moving out here would help.  I’d be able to make new friends and not have to worry about getting those pitiful stares wherever I went.  I was wrong though.  Moving out here just made it easier to take as many pills as I wanted without my parents breathing down my neck.”
     
    “How many pills are you taking a day, Ade?”
     
    Adrianna had to think about it before she gave her answer, trying to calculate in her head.  She was finding it hard to concentrate, her post-coital high having worn off.  “On a good day, ten, a bad day, up to twenty.  I’m pathetic, I know.”
     
    Jack squeezed his arms around her a little tighter and told her to hush.  “That’s actually not that bad,” he said.  “Let me ask you something though, how is your doctor not noticing how many pills you are taking?  Surely he realizes you’re taking more than you should be.”
     
    Adrianna was getting restless and her back was beginning to ache from lying on the floor so she wiggled out of Jack’s arms.  Stretching, she went in search of her clothes, throwing only her shirt and panties on before returning to the couch.  Jack’s pants were located as well and when he had them on he joined her.  Adrianna had been hoping he’d forget his last question but even after they were seated again he looked at her expectantly.
     
    “I stockpiled a lot of the pills when I was still living at home and I’m very convincing when I see the doctor,” she admitted to him.  “I lie and make something up or I’ll cry and he takes pity on me.  As far as the pharmacies go, I switch around a lot, use online drug stores sometimes and don’t file it with insurance.  I just pay cash and it’s worked so far.”
     
    By the time she finished, Adrianna’s voice had taken on a certain tone that conveyed annoyance and Jack tried to reassure her.  “I’m not trying to pry; I just want to understand as much as I can so that I can help you, Ade.”
     
    “Does it really matter how I get them?” she demanded.  “It’s not like I’m buying them illegally or prostituting myself for them, Jack.”
     
    She was on the downward cadence of a mood swing and Jack recognized it.  Just moments ago she had been fine talking about her problem and now she was becoming defensive and angry. 
     
    “You want another pill right now, don’t you?” he asked her.
     
    She clenched her jaw and looked away from him.  After a second she shook her head in denial.
     
    “Adrianna, I’m not so stupid to think you won’t need the pills anymore since I’ve professed my love to you.  I do love you and I do want you to stop but I don’t want you to be uncomfortable.  If you need to, take a damn pill.”
     
    She waited another few seconds before giving in and heading back to the kitchen.  Jack remained on the couch, giving her some semblance of privacy while she did something he knew she was ashamed of. 
     
    When she came back to him and yawned again, he led her through the hall into his bedroom and settled them comfortably on his bed.  He cradled her in his arms and said, “Rest for a while.  We can talk more