text message out of him. I quickly typed, then stared at my words for two minutes, debating if I should really hit send. Please forgive me. I don’t want it to end this way. I need you. My thumb lightly tapped the phone repeatedly. Finally, I sucked it up and sent it. Probably shouldn’t have, ‘cause I spent the rest of my shift checking my phone to see if it mysteriously turned its ringer off or died on me. Pathetic, I know, and believe me when I say I berated myself for it every time I checked.
My eyes glanced toward Evan each time I returned my phone to my pocket. He caught my phone check several times, and I was quite certain he knew what I was doing. Did he find it pathetic too? Or was he just lying in wait to see if Robert would ever give me the time of day again, officially making me a vulnerable free agent. But Evan’s blank face continually left me questioning his true thoughts.
Sometime around midnight, I heard a bird chirp. I gasped as my body involuntarily thrust upward from the bed and stumbled the few steps in the dark to retrieve my phone. The pounding in my chest intensified when Robert’s name flashed across the screen, informing me of a text message. I hesitated, afraid to push the button that would allow me to read it. What if he told me to go to hell? Sure, he should’ve calmed down by now, but what if he hadn’t, and I just pushed him over the edge by bugging him one too many times? What if this was the text that told me I’d lost him forever?
I sorta collapsed onto the edge of the bed, my thumb twitching over the screen. I bit the right side of my lower lip as I found the courage to push on the notification. I’m not sure I can. You didn’t push him away. My chest expelled the air in my lungs and my mouth fell as my face went slack. I don’t know how long I sat there staring at those words, but I had to keep the phone from dimming several times.
It wasn’t what I hoped for, and it left me wondering what to think. No, he hadn’t completely given up on me, but he still didn’t seem close to making a decision. How long was I supposed to wait? Would he even tell me if he decided against me, or would he just leave me hanging for good measure? I don’t know what led me to do it, but I suddenly came to life and dialed his number. One ring, two, three… After the fourth, voicemail picked up and I hung up. He still wasn’t gonna talk -talk to me.
Why wasn’t he talking to me?! It was starting to tick me off! We were never immune to fights; we’d had our fair share as a couple. Sure, we’d get ticked off at one another, go several hours without speaking and even sleep in separate beds for the night, but we always forgave each other and got over it. He’d never avoided me like this before, and I just didn’t know what to do anymore.
I began to feel numb. And a little sad. Robert hadn’t forgiven me yet…and I began to fear he never would.
The next day, there weren’t too many patrons in the bookstore. I wanted nothing more than to take a break and have some much needed girl talk with Sophie, but for some reason my phone was getting zip in terms of a signal. Which, of course, played hell on my nerves in terms of Robert. If he sent me any type of message today, I wasn’t gonna get it in real time.
I relieved Lindsey behind the register and sulked in the chair, waiting on the next sale to approach. I spotted Evan reading from within the coffee shop, but the day passed with nothing more than quiet glances between us. It was like he knew I needed to be left alone today.
Where the hell was Robert? Sitting in class? Swim practice? I tried to call him twice this morning before my signal went kaput, but his cell went straight to voicemail. Or he cut me off to send me straight
My eyes glanced toward Evan each time I returned my phone to my pocket. He caught my phone check several times, and I was quite certain he knew what I was doing. Did he find it pathetic too? Or was he just lying in wait to see if Robert would ever give me the time of day again, officially making me a vulnerable free agent. But Evan’s blank face continually left me questioning his true thoughts.
Sometime around midnight, I heard a bird chirp. I gasped as my body involuntarily thrust upward from the bed and stumbled the few steps in the dark to retrieve my phone. The pounding in my chest intensified when Robert’s name flashed across the screen, informing me of a text message. I hesitated, afraid to push the button that would allow me to read it. What if he told me to go to hell? Sure, he should’ve calmed down by now, but what if he hadn’t, and I just pushed him over the edge by bugging him one too many times? What if this was the text that told me I’d lost him forever?
I sorta collapsed onto the edge of the bed, my thumb twitching over the screen. I bit the right side of my lower lip as I found the courage to push on the notification. I’m not sure I can. You didn’t push him away. My chest expelled the air in my lungs and my mouth fell as my face went slack. I don’t know how long I sat there staring at those words, but I had to keep the phone from dimming several times.
It wasn’t what I hoped for, and it left me wondering what to think. No, he hadn’t completely given up on me, but he still didn’t seem close to making a decision. How long was I supposed to wait? Would he even tell me if he decided against me, or would he just leave me hanging for good measure? I don’t know what led me to do it, but I suddenly came to life and dialed his number. One ring, two, three… After the fourth, voicemail picked up and I hung up. He still wasn’t gonna talk -talk to me.
Why wasn’t he talking to me?! It was starting to tick me off! We were never immune to fights; we’d had our fair share as a couple. Sure, we’d get ticked off at one another, go several hours without speaking and even sleep in separate beds for the night, but we always forgave each other and got over it. He’d never avoided me like this before, and I just didn’t know what to do anymore.
I began to feel numb. And a little sad. Robert hadn’t forgiven me yet…and I began to fear he never would.
The next day, there weren’t too many patrons in the bookstore. I wanted nothing more than to take a break and have some much needed girl talk with Sophie, but for some reason my phone was getting zip in terms of a signal. Which, of course, played hell on my nerves in terms of Robert. If he sent me any type of message today, I wasn’t gonna get it in real time.
I relieved Lindsey behind the register and sulked in the chair, waiting on the next sale to approach. I spotted Evan reading from within the coffee shop, but the day passed with nothing more than quiet glances between us. It was like he knew I needed to be left alone today.
Where the hell was Robert? Sitting in class? Swim practice? I tried to call him twice this morning before my signal went kaput, but his cell went straight to voicemail. Or he cut me off to send me straight
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