Every Young Man's Battle: Stategies for Victory in the Real World of Sexual Temptation: The Every Man Series by Stephen Arterburn Page A
Authors: Stephen Arterburn
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weren’t
uttered in resignation. They were the words of a fighter, a real man, a soldier
who faced bombs and machine-gun fire in the South Pacific before returning to
America and eventually starting Baker Mechanical Company with two pipe wrenches
and a $125 pickup truck. (It would become one of the largest companies of its
kind in America.) The cancer hit him hard, but he had no plans for
surrender.
Might as well keep fighting. What was Bernie’s
alternative?
To quit and die.
What about you and your battle
with your impure eyes and mind? What’s your alternative to fighting?
To become ensnared and die spiritually.
When you talk to courageous
men from Bernie’s generation, World War II veterans who embody the title
of Tom Brokaw’s book
The Greatest Generation,
they say they
don’t feel like heroes. They simply had a job to do. When the
landing-craft ramps fell open, they swallowed hard and said, “It’s
time.” Time to fight.
In your struggle with sexual impurity,
isn’t it time? Sure, fighting back will be hard. It was for us. When we
began our fight, we fully expected to take a beating at first, and we did. Our
sins had humbled us. But we wanted victory over those sins and the respect of
our God.
Your life is under a withering barrage of machine-gun
sexuality that rakes the landscape mercilessly. God has trained you for battle
and given you the weapons, along with the promise that courageous young men of
God can stop the fire.
But right now you’re in a landing craft,
bobbing and inching closer to shore and a showdown. You can enter the fray now,
or you can dawdle until this withering barrage leaves your spiritual landscape
devastated, which means you’ll have to fight later among deeper ruins and
more desperate conditions. But the showdown will come. You can’t stay in
the landing craft forever. Sooner or later, the ramp will drop, and then it
will be your time to run bravely into the teeth of the enemy. God will run with
you, but He won’t run for you.
It’s time to plunge ahead
and go like a man.
G OING TO W AR , G OING TO W IN
Several years ago
I counseled a high-school sophomore named Ben who said he wanted sexual
integrity. But his words were just words. “I’m still buying the
Playbo
y
s,” he said recently. “I guess I just
don’t hate them enough.”
Similarly, I’m reminded of
seventeen-year-old Ronnie, who was masturbating several times a day. His pastor
told me, “Ronnie says he wants to be free, but he doesn’t feel any
compunction to put in any effort on his own. He’ll give up his sin, but
only if God does it.”
Later, Ronnie rushed into his
pastor’s office in terror, saying, “Pastor, you’ve got to
help me! You know the fantasies I have while masturbating? Two weeks ago, they
suddenly turned homosexual, and I can’t make them stop!” That was
the moment when Ronnie needed to stand up and fight.
We’ve known
those who have failed in their battle for sexual purity, and we know some who
have won. The difference?
Those who won hated their impurity.
They
were going to war and going to win—or die trying. Every resource was
leveled upon the foe.
There will be no victory in this area of your
life until you choose manhood with all your might. In the arena of sexual
purity, you’re at your own point of decision.
Look in the mirror.
Are you authentic? Are you proud of your sexual fantasizing? Or do you feel
degraded after viewing cyber porn or sex scenes in films?
Is a
low-grade sexual fever burning? Like any low-grade fever, it doesn’t
disable you, but you aren’t healthy, either. Spiritually, you can sort of
function normally, but you can’t push hard. You just get by. And if this
fever doesn’t break, you’ll never fully function as a Christian.
Like the prodigal son, you need to come to your senses and make a decision.
Here are some more questions to ask yourself:
• How long am I
going to stay sexually
uttered in resignation. They were the words of a fighter, a real man, a soldier
who faced bombs and machine-gun fire in the South Pacific before returning to
America and eventually starting Baker Mechanical Company with two pipe wrenches
and a $125 pickup truck. (It would become one of the largest companies of its
kind in America.) The cancer hit him hard, but he had no plans for
surrender.
Might as well keep fighting. What was Bernie’s
alternative?
To quit and die.
What about you and your battle
with your impure eyes and mind? What’s your alternative to fighting?
To become ensnared and die spiritually.
When you talk to courageous
men from Bernie’s generation, World War II veterans who embody the title
of Tom Brokaw’s book
The Greatest Generation,
they say they
don’t feel like heroes. They simply had a job to do. When the
landing-craft ramps fell open, they swallowed hard and said, “It’s
time.” Time to fight.
In your struggle with sexual impurity,
isn’t it time? Sure, fighting back will be hard. It was for us. When we
began our fight, we fully expected to take a beating at first, and we did. Our
sins had humbled us. But we wanted victory over those sins and the respect of
our God.
Your life is under a withering barrage of machine-gun
sexuality that rakes the landscape mercilessly. God has trained you for battle
and given you the weapons, along with the promise that courageous young men of
God can stop the fire.
But right now you’re in a landing craft,
bobbing and inching closer to shore and a showdown. You can enter the fray now,
or you can dawdle until this withering barrage leaves your spiritual landscape
devastated, which means you’ll have to fight later among deeper ruins and
more desperate conditions. But the showdown will come. You can’t stay in
the landing craft forever. Sooner or later, the ramp will drop, and then it
will be your time to run bravely into the teeth of the enemy. God will run with
you, but He won’t run for you.
It’s time to plunge ahead
and go like a man.
G OING TO W AR , G OING TO W IN
Several years ago
I counseled a high-school sophomore named Ben who said he wanted sexual
integrity. But his words were just words. “I’m still buying the
Playbo
y
s,” he said recently. “I guess I just
don’t hate them enough.”
Similarly, I’m reminded of
seventeen-year-old Ronnie, who was masturbating several times a day. His pastor
told me, “Ronnie says he wants to be free, but he doesn’t feel any
compunction to put in any effort on his own. He’ll give up his sin, but
only if God does it.”
Later, Ronnie rushed into his
pastor’s office in terror, saying, “Pastor, you’ve got to
help me! You know the fantasies I have while masturbating? Two weeks ago, they
suddenly turned homosexual, and I can’t make them stop!” That was
the moment when Ronnie needed to stand up and fight.
We’ve known
those who have failed in their battle for sexual purity, and we know some who
have won. The difference?
Those who won hated their impurity.
They
were going to war and going to win—or die trying. Every resource was
leveled upon the foe.
There will be no victory in this area of your
life until you choose manhood with all your might. In the arena of sexual
purity, you’re at your own point of decision.
Look in the mirror.
Are you authentic? Are you proud of your sexual fantasizing? Or do you feel
degraded after viewing cyber porn or sex scenes in films?
Is a
low-grade sexual fever burning? Like any low-grade fever, it doesn’t
disable you, but you aren’t healthy, either. Spiritually, you can sort of
function normally, but you can’t push hard. You just get by. And if this
fever doesn’t break, you’ll never fully function as a Christian.
Like the prodigal son, you need to come to your senses and make a decision.
Here are some more questions to ask yourself:
• How long am I
going to stay sexually