Ether by Dana Michelle Belle Page A

becoming separated, just as he always does in
large crowds. This time, however, a warm, self-consciousness spreads through
me.
                The sensation
of holding his hand is briefly all I can think about, so I miss the faces as we
weave through the crowd. My eyes are trained on Justin’s muscled back and
shoulders as he moves us toward Mandy.
                Mandy is
holding court in the dining room, which has been cleared of all its furniture
and set up with sound equipment, lights and a bar, probably all rented by her
parents. They’re more the credit card than quality time parents.  The space
around Mandy is a little less congested but Justin doesn’t let go of my hand as
the crowd thins and I don’t pull away.
                As we come closer,
Mandy raises one eyebrow in that dainty questioning look she practices for
these occasions. “Hello Becka and Justin, ” she says, placing far too
much emphasis on his name.  And then she giggles and launched into a high
speed, highly mortifying monologue. “Oh my god, I can’t believe the two of you
came here together . I always sort of thought you two were, and I’m so
glad you are! You’ll have to tell me all about it. Don’t you just love the
lights? And don’t mind the bar Becka, it’s all virgin . My parents aren’t
totally without responsibility. Of course I’m sure someone will start spiking
the drinks soon enough, so do be a little careful. So I hear your dad totally
gave you the car…”
                She’s over
excited, even by Mandy standards, and her voice is both booming and shrill as
she speaks, sort of like a chipmunk speaking through a megaphone. As usual
though, I only really hear the first bit, along with the rest of the room full
of people.  I turn about fifteen shades of red everything from cherry, to ruby,
salsa, brick, and jazzberry jam red.
                Justin just
laughs. While she’s extolling the virtues of a heated pool he whispers, “Don’t
let her bother you. Just because Mandy announces something doesn’t mean anyone
is paying attention.”
                The feeling
of him standing so near makes my heart pound with both panic and pleasure at
the same time, like the right and left side of it are pumping to different
tunes. Maybe that’s why I’m feeling this terrible squeezing sensation. Everyone
obviously thinks this was a date, part of me included. And just as obviously,
Justin and I are going to need to have a real long talk, but not tonight. Not
in a crowded party, drowning in sound. Besides, what’s the harm? It’s not like
we’re going to slip upstairs and make out.
                We do joke,
and flirt. Justin is in an amazingly good mood, and so full of happiness that I
wouldn’t ruin it for anything. Someone new takes over the music and it becomes unexpectedly
decent and danceable. Justin shoots me a questioning look and then offers me
his hand. We’ve danced together often enough before; I rationalize.
                It’s
different this time though, there’s electricity between us and I’ve never been
so aware of him. It’s like one of those moments in the movies when the crowd
fades out and the world shrinks down to two people. He’s close to me, very close.
So close that I am breathing his breath in. In another second his lips will be
touching mine and-
                And our
friendship will be ruined. I take a giant step backward, bashing right into
someone behind me. The intense world fading spell between us shatters and I see
a range of confusion and hurt play across Justin’s face before I turn and dash
toward the open French doors at the end of the room.
                The cool
air of the night hits my face, and my lungs fill, cleaning out the heat and the
confusion of the dance floor. I don’t have to turn around to know that Justin
has followed me outside. Of course he has. I take my time turning