She was okay with that.
She was almost at the door when she heard him, "Ella... Ella is my sister. A sister I lost when I was six."
She stopped and looked at him, but he was still standing as she left him, his back to her. She walked a little way back, stopping far enough away to where he couldn't touch her if he turned around. He didn't.
"They took her away first. Before my parents. But nobody ever said she was dead. They didn't tend to kill little girls. They just made them slaves. The parents they killed. I knew that even then. But Ella was still out there somewhere in one of these compounds. I've looked for her for almost three years now in every place I could get to. She's all I have left, Amelia. And... And if you told her anything about me, you may have just killed her..." He turned around then, hands still behind his back, as if he didn't trust himself not to hurt her.
She couldn't tell him what she had done after this... He was right of course. She'd come looking for him, Ella would, asking questions. She was probably running through every room of the compound right now, looking for her brother, and she would get caught by Drake or one of the other guards. He was waiting for her to just say it. Her face was betraying her again, and even in the semi-darkness, he should be able to read the shame in it.
She could run, if she ran fast enough. She didn't think he'd try to stop her, but he didn't deserve that. It felt wrong to do that to him, to leave him with the not knowing. She didn't mean to tell Ella his name. It felt like a small kindness at the time, that's all. She just wanted to take some of the sadness away, and to apologize for the lying.
She willed herself to walk closer to him, close enough to where he could touch her, looked him in the eyes and said, more quietly than she meant to, "I told her that I needed the meds for my friend, my friend Riley. I didn't mean to at first, but then it felt right. She looked like you, Riley, I felt something. Like looking at a girl you, only older. The same everything. So I asked her for her name and she wrote it for me, but then she seemed so sad, it just came out. I really didn't mean to do it, to put her in danger, I really didn't, Riley. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." She was crying, she knew, she couldn't help it.
She waited for him to say something or do something, hit her even, if he wanted to. She'd let him, but he just stood unmoving, his face impossibly close to hers, too close not to see tears pooling in his eyes. She wanted to disappear through the floor, anything to make him not look at her like that, to not see him hurting like that, and knowing that she did this to him. The other things she knew were before her, something else, memories of something maybe, but this, this she did, and this was the worst thing of all.
She smelled him before she saw him, the faint hint of sage. He was standing in the shadows, just out of range of the small light, Drake, the guard. So she did kill his sister, and maybe even Riley, and whatever they would do to her for this. She didn't know what they would do to her, hadn't thought about getting caught. But whatever it was would be better than this. She couldn't take this for another second.
She wiped her face as much as she could with nothing but her hands to collect all the water, walked up to Drake, the giant mute, and handed him her wet hands to put the cuffs on, "This was all my fault, Drake. I practically kept the boy a prisoner here. He amused me. He didn't mean to be here. You have to believe me. I'm A.L. You have to let him go, you just have to!"
She looked up at his face trying to read it and of all things, he was smiling at her. A big smile that made no sense with anything. "It's okay, Drake. She's all right," Riley, that. The mute still smiling at her, "I know, Riley. I know she is," and he wrapped her in a hug, and let her sob into his uniform, and sob she did for a very long time, until she could breathe again
She was almost at the door when she heard him, "Ella... Ella is my sister. A sister I lost when I was six."
She stopped and looked at him, but he was still standing as she left him, his back to her. She walked a little way back, stopping far enough away to where he couldn't touch her if he turned around. He didn't.
"They took her away first. Before my parents. But nobody ever said she was dead. They didn't tend to kill little girls. They just made them slaves. The parents they killed. I knew that even then. But Ella was still out there somewhere in one of these compounds. I've looked for her for almost three years now in every place I could get to. She's all I have left, Amelia. And... And if you told her anything about me, you may have just killed her..." He turned around then, hands still behind his back, as if he didn't trust himself not to hurt her.
She couldn't tell him what she had done after this... He was right of course. She'd come looking for him, Ella would, asking questions. She was probably running through every room of the compound right now, looking for her brother, and she would get caught by Drake or one of the other guards. He was waiting for her to just say it. Her face was betraying her again, and even in the semi-darkness, he should be able to read the shame in it.
She could run, if she ran fast enough. She didn't think he'd try to stop her, but he didn't deserve that. It felt wrong to do that to him, to leave him with the not knowing. She didn't mean to tell Ella his name. It felt like a small kindness at the time, that's all. She just wanted to take some of the sadness away, and to apologize for the lying.
She willed herself to walk closer to him, close enough to where he could touch her, looked him in the eyes and said, more quietly than she meant to, "I told her that I needed the meds for my friend, my friend Riley. I didn't mean to at first, but then it felt right. She looked like you, Riley, I felt something. Like looking at a girl you, only older. The same everything. So I asked her for her name and she wrote it for me, but then she seemed so sad, it just came out. I really didn't mean to do it, to put her in danger, I really didn't, Riley. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." She was crying, she knew, she couldn't help it.
She waited for him to say something or do something, hit her even, if he wanted to. She'd let him, but he just stood unmoving, his face impossibly close to hers, too close not to see tears pooling in his eyes. She wanted to disappear through the floor, anything to make him not look at her like that, to not see him hurting like that, and knowing that she did this to him. The other things she knew were before her, something else, memories of something maybe, but this, this she did, and this was the worst thing of all.
She smelled him before she saw him, the faint hint of sage. He was standing in the shadows, just out of range of the small light, Drake, the guard. So she did kill his sister, and maybe even Riley, and whatever they would do to her for this. She didn't know what they would do to her, hadn't thought about getting caught. But whatever it was would be better than this. She couldn't take this for another second.
She wiped her face as much as she could with nothing but her hands to collect all the water, walked up to Drake, the giant mute, and handed him her wet hands to put the cuffs on, "This was all my fault, Drake. I practically kept the boy a prisoner here. He amused me. He didn't mean to be here. You have to believe me. I'm A.L. You have to let him go, you just have to!"
She looked up at his face trying to read it and of all things, he was smiling at her. A big smile that made no sense with anything. "It's okay, Drake. She's all right," Riley, that. The mute still smiling at her, "I know, Riley. I know she is," and he wrapped her in a hug, and let her sob into his uniform, and sob she did for a very long time, until she could breathe again
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