teeth
enter her wrist. She fights him, but doesn’t take her eyes from me.
“I love you,” I tell her. “Never forget that.”
Her voice goes soft and dreamy as she
begs, “Don’t leave me, Sarn. Give me these years, please…” Her eyes
close before she sees the tears that run down my face.
Dmitri watches me with amber eyes. “We
will watch over her my friend.”
“ Thank you,” is all I
manage to say. I walk to the door as a truck pulls up to the
cabin.
“ The she-bear will take you
to the realm crossing.”
I nod and walk through the door. I
don’t look back. I can’t. If I turn, I will never leave. My
punishment for all my sins is complete. Dragons don’t forgive, but
neither does an angry Goddess.
***
Six months
later…
My servants are gone. They’ve been
dispersed to my brother dragons’ castles. I don’t want or need them
here. Each day is harder than the last and my rage is dangerous to
anyone who gets close to me. I’ve turned away my friends and told
them if they return I will consider them enemies. Bastian was
angry, Tahr heartbroken, and of course Laryn wasn’t there. He will
never forgive me and that is as it should be.
I dream of Sierra each night. I
actually hate to sleep now. The dreams are always of the final look
in her eyes with some small variation on the theme of my leaving.
Her begging, crying, fighting, and the worst… her dead eyes staring
at nothing. I wake up shouting her name on the worst
nights.
Before I sent my servants away, I had
them cover the windows in dark cloth and pour out all the alcohol.
I do not deserve the escape liquor offers and I do not deserve
sunshine. The light left my life when I left my love
behind.
I have twenty-three years and four
months until the next claiming. I suffer because I deserve
it.
***
Sierra
Sarn left me even when I begged him to
stay. My sad, angry dragon did not understand. We had twenty-four
years before we needed to separate. A wolf without her mate is
nothing. Maybe I could find a way to move on if I thought him dead.
There is no denying he lives. Even without him at my side, I carry
him in my soul. It hurts so much knowing he exists without my love.
It’s almost the saddest part of being separated from him. Without
my arms comforting him, I know he’s lonely and
suffering.
I’m back at the nightclub working
beside my brother behind the bar. Roland tries to speak with me
about Sarn, but I won’t listen. Sarn is my pain to bear. Roland has
opened up about his life and we’ve discussed what he will do with
his future. I know he’s speaking of these things in order to get me
to share my feelings. I can’t. There are no words to describe my
mangled heart that is no longer beating to the pace of
Sarn’s.
Roland grows desperate and decides we
need to travel to our father so he can tell him the truth about his
sexuality. This is an excuse. Roland is so distressed by me that
he’s willing to do anything. I actually don’t mind going because I
need to run through the Everglades and let my wolf take the lead
for a few weeks. It’s too crowded in bear territory and everyone
knows what has happened to me. I feel their sympathy and it only
increases the ache I carry. My father’s clan is made up of mostly
cat shifters. They will have no problem giving me space if I
request it.
My wolf is another problem. She’s as
listless as I am. Usually we counterbalance the other, but that’s
no longer the case. Our pain swirls around us and we are in perfect
accord. There is no life without our mate.
Dmitri gives me and Roland the use of
his plane. I’m relieved when the morning finally arrives and it’s
time to leave. I don’t know if I will ever return. Maybe if my
brother decides to. Even though I won’t speak to Roland about Sarn,
I need Roland close to me. Our internal twin bond is all I have to
hold onto.
When I see my father and Talya waiting
as we exit the plane, I dissolve into tears. My brother lifts
enter her wrist. She fights him, but doesn’t take her eyes from me.
“I love you,” I tell her. “Never forget that.”
Her voice goes soft and dreamy as she
begs, “Don’t leave me, Sarn. Give me these years, please…” Her eyes
close before she sees the tears that run down my face.
Dmitri watches me with amber eyes. “We
will watch over her my friend.”
“ Thank you,” is all I
manage to say. I walk to the door as a truck pulls up to the
cabin.
“ The she-bear will take you
to the realm crossing.”
I nod and walk through the door. I
don’t look back. I can’t. If I turn, I will never leave. My
punishment for all my sins is complete. Dragons don’t forgive, but
neither does an angry Goddess.
***
Six months
later…
My servants are gone. They’ve been
dispersed to my brother dragons’ castles. I don’t want or need them
here. Each day is harder than the last and my rage is dangerous to
anyone who gets close to me. I’ve turned away my friends and told
them if they return I will consider them enemies. Bastian was
angry, Tahr heartbroken, and of course Laryn wasn’t there. He will
never forgive me and that is as it should be.
I dream of Sierra each night. I
actually hate to sleep now. The dreams are always of the final look
in her eyes with some small variation on the theme of my leaving.
Her begging, crying, fighting, and the worst… her dead eyes staring
at nothing. I wake up shouting her name on the worst
nights.
Before I sent my servants away, I had
them cover the windows in dark cloth and pour out all the alcohol.
I do not deserve the escape liquor offers and I do not deserve
sunshine. The light left my life when I left my love
behind.
I have twenty-three years and four
months until the next claiming. I suffer because I deserve
it.
***
Sierra
Sarn left me even when I begged him to
stay. My sad, angry dragon did not understand. We had twenty-four
years before we needed to separate. A wolf without her mate is
nothing. Maybe I could find a way to move on if I thought him dead.
There is no denying he lives. Even without him at my side, I carry
him in my soul. It hurts so much knowing he exists without my love.
It’s almost the saddest part of being separated from him. Without
my arms comforting him, I know he’s lonely and
suffering.
I’m back at the nightclub working
beside my brother behind the bar. Roland tries to speak with me
about Sarn, but I won’t listen. Sarn is my pain to bear. Roland has
opened up about his life and we’ve discussed what he will do with
his future. I know he’s speaking of these things in order to get me
to share my feelings. I can’t. There are no words to describe my
mangled heart that is no longer beating to the pace of
Sarn’s.
Roland grows desperate and decides we
need to travel to our father so he can tell him the truth about his
sexuality. This is an excuse. Roland is so distressed by me that
he’s willing to do anything. I actually don’t mind going because I
need to run through the Everglades and let my wolf take the lead
for a few weeks. It’s too crowded in bear territory and everyone
knows what has happened to me. I feel their sympathy and it only
increases the ache I carry. My father’s clan is made up of mostly
cat shifters. They will have no problem giving me space if I
request it.
My wolf is another problem. She’s as
listless as I am. Usually we counterbalance the other, but that’s
no longer the case. Our pain swirls around us and we are in perfect
accord. There is no life without our mate.
Dmitri gives me and Roland the use of
his plane. I’m relieved when the morning finally arrives and it’s
time to leave. I don’t know if I will ever return. Maybe if my
brother decides to. Even though I won’t speak to Roland about Sarn,
I need Roland close to me. Our internal twin bond is all I have to
hold onto.
When I see my father and Talya waiting
as we exit the plane, I dissolve into tears. My brother lifts
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