all she wanted to do was to sleep again. She rolled over and shut her eyes. The next time she woke up everything was silent.
She lay still for a long time, luxuriating in the fact that the knots of tension which had gripped her body for so long had been loosened by Maggie’s massage. The darkness washed over her, tempting her to sleep again. This time she fought it, however, knowing she had to face what was happening to her while her mind was clear and she was relaxed. Turning her head towards the grey lozenge of window outlined against the blackness of the walls, she relived the moments she’d spent with Pierce in the Spa.
There was no mistake. They had been equally aroused. She blushed as she recalled her erotic reaction to his touch. It was all very well for him to excuse her by telling Maggie she was suffering from stress, but whatever he might believe, she could no longer hide the truth from herself. She still loved him. Worse, she still wanted him.
She rolled onto her side, her eyes staring into the darkness as she wondered how he really felt about her. Was it a shadow of the love they’d once shared that had prompted his passionate assault on her senses or was it just an overdose of testosterone? It had to be one or the other because she was under no illusions about her body. She had nothing left that would have turned him on. What had once been slenderness had long ago become angles as her curves diminished along with the bloom of her skin. Caring for the twins on a shoestring hadn’t given her time to take care of her body.
She reached out and snapped on the bedside light and then pushed the bedcovers away. Her body had fined down almost to boyishness and a glance in the mirror opposite showed a cropped head and huge, waif-like eyes. There was nothing of the old Kerry Farrow left, nothing that could possibly attract Pierce, nothing that could compete with the voluptuous, athletic beauty of Marissa Reynolds.
She stared despondently at her reflection as she recalled Maggie’s words. How was Marissa going to react when she found out about the twins and discovered Kerry was back in Pierce’s life? Never a good loser, she would be bitchy and vindictive. She would make things hell for all of them. The thought made Kerry shudder with despair. How could Pierce do this? How could he possibly contemplate marrying her when she looked like this and when he was all but engaged to Marissa? Perhaps he intended to have the best of both worlds: his children and his mistress, with Kerry slotted in between as a necessary inconvenience, someone to be ignored once the wedding was over.
She groaned as she swung her feet to the floor. It was madness! She wouldn’t go through with it. There had to be another way. Surely they could agree to share the children. She would promise him anything he wanted if only he would let Ben and Lauren stay with her without the travesty of a marriage. Those few moments alone with him in the Spa had shown her how painful it would be to live with him and love him while knowing all the time that deep down he resented her.
Hastily she pulled on the clothes that were folded neatly across the arm of a chair. The corduroy jeans had seen better days and the baggy sweater had once been bright pink before it faded to indeterminate beige from repeated washing. Neither of them was attractive but they had been the closest things to hand when Pierce had told her to pack sufficient clothes for a short stay at Greenleas .
“I’ll take you home in time to see the children on Thursday evening,” he’d promised. “But in the meantime you’re staying with me so I can keep an eye on you.”
One glance at the set expression on his face had dissuaded Kerry from argument and she had obediently fetched her clothes and then sobbed all over him in the van when they arrived at Greenleas . And somehow her tears and her acquiescence had had a softening effect on him, so he had restrained the worst of his impatience
She lay still for a long time, luxuriating in the fact that the knots of tension which had gripped her body for so long had been loosened by Maggie’s massage. The darkness washed over her, tempting her to sleep again. This time she fought it, however, knowing she had to face what was happening to her while her mind was clear and she was relaxed. Turning her head towards the grey lozenge of window outlined against the blackness of the walls, she relived the moments she’d spent with Pierce in the Spa.
There was no mistake. They had been equally aroused. She blushed as she recalled her erotic reaction to his touch. It was all very well for him to excuse her by telling Maggie she was suffering from stress, but whatever he might believe, she could no longer hide the truth from herself. She still loved him. Worse, she still wanted him.
She rolled onto her side, her eyes staring into the darkness as she wondered how he really felt about her. Was it a shadow of the love they’d once shared that had prompted his passionate assault on her senses or was it just an overdose of testosterone? It had to be one or the other because she was under no illusions about her body. She had nothing left that would have turned him on. What had once been slenderness had long ago become angles as her curves diminished along with the bloom of her skin. Caring for the twins on a shoestring hadn’t given her time to take care of her body.
She reached out and snapped on the bedside light and then pushed the bedcovers away. Her body had fined down almost to boyishness and a glance in the mirror opposite showed a cropped head and huge, waif-like eyes. There was nothing of the old Kerry Farrow left, nothing that could possibly attract Pierce, nothing that could compete with the voluptuous, athletic beauty of Marissa Reynolds.
She stared despondently at her reflection as she recalled Maggie’s words. How was Marissa going to react when she found out about the twins and discovered Kerry was back in Pierce’s life? Never a good loser, she would be bitchy and vindictive. She would make things hell for all of them. The thought made Kerry shudder with despair. How could Pierce do this? How could he possibly contemplate marrying her when she looked like this and when he was all but engaged to Marissa? Perhaps he intended to have the best of both worlds: his children and his mistress, with Kerry slotted in between as a necessary inconvenience, someone to be ignored once the wedding was over.
She groaned as she swung her feet to the floor. It was madness! She wouldn’t go through with it. There had to be another way. Surely they could agree to share the children. She would promise him anything he wanted if only he would let Ben and Lauren stay with her without the travesty of a marriage. Those few moments alone with him in the Spa had shown her how painful it would be to live with him and love him while knowing all the time that deep down he resented her.
Hastily she pulled on the clothes that were folded neatly across the arm of a chair. The corduroy jeans had seen better days and the baggy sweater had once been bright pink before it faded to indeterminate beige from repeated washing. Neither of them was attractive but they had been the closest things to hand when Pierce had told her to pack sufficient clothes for a short stay at Greenleas .
“I’ll take you home in time to see the children on Thursday evening,” he’d promised. “But in the meantime you’re staying with me so I can keep an eye on you.”
One glance at the set expression on his face had dissuaded Kerry from argument and she had obediently fetched her clothes and then sobbed all over him in the van when they arrived at Greenleas . And somehow her tears and her acquiescence had had a softening effect on him, so he had restrained the worst of his impatience
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