Doctor Who: Festival of Death: 50th Anniversary Edition by Jonathan Morris Page B

–’ piped up K-9.
    ‘Just leave me alone.’ The Doctor closed his eyes and leaned on to the console. His voice cracked under the strain. ‘Leave me alone, both of you.’

C HAPTER F IVE
    IT WAS SOMEWHERE around the bow star on the edge of the galaxy that the drugs began to take hold. Hoopy was in the aft seat, swigging on a bottle of Old Bizzarre, whilst Biscit sat at the wood-effect dashboard, unwrapping a chocolate bar, cutting a tab of Gylcerat and changing the music on the digidisc. Xab lay on the seat next to him, sniffing blissfully on a vial of Etheramyl.
    Hoopy clunked the drained bottle to one side. He could feel the Novovacuous billowing up inside him, the sweetness snaking up through his veins, into the tips of his spines. He lit a joss candle to celebrate and rearranged his kaftan and neck beads. Suddenly the tassles seemed so interesting and colourful.
    Biscit gulped his chocolate, popped his tab and twisted up the volume. The music surged over them, a roar of guitars and sitars. Then the drums came in, pounding like an earthquake. It was the most incredible noise Hoopy had ever heard.
    Biscit slumped back into his seat, his tongue lolling. ‘My loaf feels a bit trip-switched,’ he groaned, sliding down the chair in little bumps. ‘Can somebody else take the steer?’
    Hoopy struggled forward to the pilot seat, ignoring the way the colours seemed to trail about after him, and the way the music resonated with his soul. The floor was strewn with collapsed piles of cartons, plastic bags and spent herbal sticks, and the ship was lurching seasickeningly from side to side.
    Seeing Hoopy staggering towards him, Biscit fumbled out of his buckle-belt. ‘Totally groovy, Hoopster. You’re the main Gonzie. I need some medicine.’
    Hoopy took command of the
Indigo Glow
. There were hundreds of instruments in front of him, some red, some yellow, some green. All giving off little flashes and making beep noises. It was very pretty, whatever it meant.
    He studied the viewscreen, concentrating on keeping his eyes open. An asteroid rushed towards them; Hoopy gave the joystick a jolt and the asteroid soared overhead in terrifying detail. As the
Indigo Glow
swerved, Xab rolled happily to one side and Biscit crashed against the drinks locker, swearing. ‘Steer nicely!’ he yelled.
    ‘Where the hole are we, Bisc?’ asked Hoopy.
    Biscit blearily examined some charts. ‘Somewhere outside Riedquat. Coordinates… oh, lots of numbers. Zone something or other.’
    ‘And whereabouts are we heading?’
    Biscit uncrumpled a leaflet. On it was an illustration of an angel – an angel with the face of a skull. Creep-out city, state spooky. Underneath was emblazoned,
Come On Through To The Other Side
.
    ‘“The Beautiful Death”,’ said Biscit proudly, uncorking a bottle of Mobster. ‘A voyage to the undiscovered country.’
    ‘The beautiful what?’
    ‘It’s the ultimate trip!’ Biscit shouted into Hoopy’s ear. He had fire-eater breath. ‘You get to be dead!’
    ‘Freak out! No way?’
    ‘Your whole life recapping before your peepers. The answers to life, the universe, and everything! You see the afterlife! Shangri-la! And, wow, when you come down? You are the resurrection, man!’ Biscit had reached a messianic crescendo. ‘You know how oldies after near-death experiences always bang on about how they’ve been given new insight into life and that whole profundity bag? Well, this is it! That whole “blossomiest blossom” vibe!’ He shook Hoopy fervently by the shoulders. ‘Dying! Our whole lives have been leading up to this!’
    ‘Totally nice and groovy!’ Hoopy flicked over the leaflet. ‘The G-Lock. Teredekethon–Murgatroyd hyperspace conduit. Pas de problem.’ He rattled the destination into the navigation computer. The computer corrected the spelling and plotted a course. ‘I’ve never tried being dead before. Well… nearly, a few times… but never all the way.’
    ‘Happy hunting ground, here