through. The refrigerator hummed in the corner of the small kitchen, drawing attention to its chipped, enameled body. Everything was bathed in fluorescent light, and as Kai began to gather his things I realized that this place had never been Kai’s home—and he had never wanted it to be. I crossed the room to help him pack and he looked at me, his smile wide and easy. And in that moment, without a word, I knew we were both thinking about starting a new life together.
“What was it like? Living with your fiancé?” Kai asked, jarring me out of my thoughts.
“Why do you want to know?”
“I’m curious about Connor and your life before you came here—tell me about it,” he demanded.
“What am I supposed to say?”
“I don’t know.”
I bit my lip in thought. “I hated his socks and all they stood for. Rigid, confining. When he proposed, I should’ve broken it off, but I didn’t. Instead I complacently accepted him.” I stared at Kai, my mouth tight with remembrance. “I don’t want to talk about who I was. I was scared to dream. Scared to think I could be different, or have something different. I settled, and I don’t want to talk about it.”
“It’s the flaws that make us truly love someone.”
“That’s far too poetic, even for me, Kai.”
He smiled.
“Can I tell you some things I want you to know?”
Kai nodded.
“I love that we stay awake late into the nights, learning the outlines of one another. I love that I’ve learned you by touch. I love that the small crinkles at the corners of your despondent, troubadour eyes tell your life story. And when I’m in your arms and you’re inside me, I feel a connection deeper than words can describe.”
He embraced me as I continued to speak, “I know your heart has been broken, but I want to help you stitch it back together…Will you let me?”
Kai’s hands cradled my cheeks as he stared into my eyes. His lips covered mine, and we fell into the moment—and each other.
Chapter 16
Sage
Winter turned to spring, and the grapes in Armand’s vineyard ripened. I helped out around the bed and breakfast, deriving a primitive joy from being productive. I didn’t think about the future—choosing instead to live in the present, wanting to soak up every experience, every moment.
Most of my reflections found their way into a journal. Every once in a while I’d share something I wrote with Kai before putting it under the mattress, like I had been doing for years. It was the only routine I followed.
One warm May afternoon, I was manning the desk alone when Kai tore into the foyer, animated and happy. “I have a surprise for you. Can you sneak away this weekend?”
It was the sort of spontaneity I’d grown to love. “I don’t see why not.”
Twenty minutes later, we were packed, seated in a small black rental car, and driving out of the city. “Will you tell me where we’re going?”
“Nope.”
“Will I like it?”
“Yep.”
“How long do I have to wait until I find out?”
“About three-and-a-half hours. Turn on some music.”
“What do you want to hear? Jazz? Bluegrass?”
Kai grinned. “How about some Creedence?”
I smiled back. “Perfect road trip music.” I peered out the window, enjoying the scenery. The countryside was in bloom, and the lush rolling hills reminded me of a postcard.
“It doesn’t look real, does it?” Kai asked.
I glanced at him; he smiled, but his eyes were on the road. “I still can’t believe I get to call France home. Is it home for you?”
“Home is wherever you are, Sage. Does that scare you?”
“Not anymore,” I admitted. “What are your dreams, Kai?”
“To feel the way I feel right now—forever.”
I caught my breath. “And you call me the writer.”
He sighed. “I never thought this was going to be my life. I didn’t think I deserved this; to feel all I feel for you, to want to laugh and cry in your arms.” His throat tightened with emotion.
I brushed tears from my
“What was it like? Living with your fiancé?” Kai asked, jarring me out of my thoughts.
“Why do you want to know?”
“I’m curious about Connor and your life before you came here—tell me about it,” he demanded.
“What am I supposed to say?”
“I don’t know.”
I bit my lip in thought. “I hated his socks and all they stood for. Rigid, confining. When he proposed, I should’ve broken it off, but I didn’t. Instead I complacently accepted him.” I stared at Kai, my mouth tight with remembrance. “I don’t want to talk about who I was. I was scared to dream. Scared to think I could be different, or have something different. I settled, and I don’t want to talk about it.”
“It’s the flaws that make us truly love someone.”
“That’s far too poetic, even for me, Kai.”
He smiled.
“Can I tell you some things I want you to know?”
Kai nodded.
“I love that we stay awake late into the nights, learning the outlines of one another. I love that I’ve learned you by touch. I love that the small crinkles at the corners of your despondent, troubadour eyes tell your life story. And when I’m in your arms and you’re inside me, I feel a connection deeper than words can describe.”
He embraced me as I continued to speak, “I know your heart has been broken, but I want to help you stitch it back together…Will you let me?”
Kai’s hands cradled my cheeks as he stared into my eyes. His lips covered mine, and we fell into the moment—and each other.
Chapter 16
Sage
Winter turned to spring, and the grapes in Armand’s vineyard ripened. I helped out around the bed and breakfast, deriving a primitive joy from being productive. I didn’t think about the future—choosing instead to live in the present, wanting to soak up every experience, every moment.
Most of my reflections found their way into a journal. Every once in a while I’d share something I wrote with Kai before putting it under the mattress, like I had been doing for years. It was the only routine I followed.
One warm May afternoon, I was manning the desk alone when Kai tore into the foyer, animated and happy. “I have a surprise for you. Can you sneak away this weekend?”
It was the sort of spontaneity I’d grown to love. “I don’t see why not.”
Twenty minutes later, we were packed, seated in a small black rental car, and driving out of the city. “Will you tell me where we’re going?”
“Nope.”
“Will I like it?”
“Yep.”
“How long do I have to wait until I find out?”
“About three-and-a-half hours. Turn on some music.”
“What do you want to hear? Jazz? Bluegrass?”
Kai grinned. “How about some Creedence?”
I smiled back. “Perfect road trip music.” I peered out the window, enjoying the scenery. The countryside was in bloom, and the lush rolling hills reminded me of a postcard.
“It doesn’t look real, does it?” Kai asked.
I glanced at him; he smiled, but his eyes were on the road. “I still can’t believe I get to call France home. Is it home for you?”
“Home is wherever you are, Sage. Does that scare you?”
“Not anymore,” I admitted. “What are your dreams, Kai?”
“To feel the way I feel right now—forever.”
I caught my breath. “And you call me the writer.”
He sighed. “I never thought this was going to be my life. I didn’t think I deserved this; to feel all I feel for you, to want to laugh and cry in your arms.” His throat tightened with emotion.
I brushed tears from my
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