married my father. She got pregnant with us… She was on the sofa, dressed in her uniform and sandwiched between two of my father’s friends...pilots who worked with my dad. I asked her what she was doing, she said they were practising flying. When I said I wanted to join them, she told me to go back to bed, that I was just having a dream.”
Samantha tried to picture him as a seven-year-old. He must have been cute beyond words. And thank God he hadn’t understood at the time what he was witnessing.
“Then one day when I was about twelve, I forgot my Maths homework and rode home at lunch time to get it. She was there with my uncle Nico—I don’t think you’ve ever met him. He’s my father’s younger brother and a pilot too. They were in the kitchen. She was sitting on the kitchen table and he was standing between her legs. They were fully dressed—he in his uniform and she in her air hostess uniform again, although she hadn’t returned to work after having Zoë and me—but I had known that they were having sex although he had his back towards me. He didn’t see me, but she did.”
He took a shuddering breath before controlling himself and Samantha knew that he must have been briefly back in time, reliving the devastating moment.
“I ran back to school as fast as I could, forgetting that I had ridden my bike home and as I was running I remembered her and those two men. I’d realized that it hadn’t been a dream. That evening she told me that she and Uncle Nico were hugging because they were fond of each other, but the guys at school and I had already been reading Playboy and Penthouse magazines, so she didn’t fool me. I didn’t speak to my uncle again until I was nineteen. I felt so bad for my father and worried that he would come home one day and find her with my uncle or another man. I worried more that he would get a gun and kill us all and then shoot himself.”
Zachary laughed mirthlessly at his overactive imagination as a child, but Samantha suspected that the fear had been hard for him to live with at the time.
“Now I’m older I’ve accepted that it’s her prerogative to sleep with whoever she wants, but as a mother it was her responsibility to protect her children from seeing things they shouldn’t or being exposed to risk.”
Zoë hadn’t mentioned the fact that Zachary had actually witnessed his mother being unfaithful, but he’d always been protective of his twin and Samantha suspected that he hadn’t told her. She wondered if it would be prudent to tell him that his sister had confided in her.
“My father’s friends were always coming to our house for dinner and drinks when he wasn’t there. I just made sure that Zoë kept her door locked and tried to sleep as lightly as possible, just in case. I was so glad when we both got into Oxford and could leave that damn house.”
Samantha breathed a sigh of relief, thinking that he’d finished. His mother had been careless and indiscreet, but thank God it hadn’t been as bad as she’d imagined.
Her relief was premature.
“I hardly ever came home. I spent the time developing my software ideas. One of my lectures, Professor Stein, thought I had a real flair and worked with me during his free time. Zoë and her friends went to Paris for the summer and I guess I must have been feeling lonely. It was also going to be my mother’s fortieth birthday the next week.”
Oh God, here it comes!
“I still had my keys and because I rarely came home, they weren’t expecting me.”
The only thing that kept Samantha from hyperventilating was the fact that he said ‘they’.
“My mother was dressed in her uniform again. She’s always told us that doing just half an hour of yoga every morning has kept her from gaining any weight since we were born. The men were all wearing pilot uniforms—four of them. My mother was between two of them—and she was giving another one…head. I
Samantha tried to picture him as a seven-year-old. He must have been cute beyond words. And thank God he hadn’t understood at the time what he was witnessing.
“Then one day when I was about twelve, I forgot my Maths homework and rode home at lunch time to get it. She was there with my uncle Nico—I don’t think you’ve ever met him. He’s my father’s younger brother and a pilot too. They were in the kitchen. She was sitting on the kitchen table and he was standing between her legs. They were fully dressed—he in his uniform and she in her air hostess uniform again, although she hadn’t returned to work after having Zoë and me—but I had known that they were having sex although he had his back towards me. He didn’t see me, but she did.”
He took a shuddering breath before controlling himself and Samantha knew that he must have been briefly back in time, reliving the devastating moment.
“I ran back to school as fast as I could, forgetting that I had ridden my bike home and as I was running I remembered her and those two men. I’d realized that it hadn’t been a dream. That evening she told me that she and Uncle Nico were hugging because they were fond of each other, but the guys at school and I had already been reading Playboy and Penthouse magazines, so she didn’t fool me. I didn’t speak to my uncle again until I was nineteen. I felt so bad for my father and worried that he would come home one day and find her with my uncle or another man. I worried more that he would get a gun and kill us all and then shoot himself.”
Zachary laughed mirthlessly at his overactive imagination as a child, but Samantha suspected that the fear had been hard for him to live with at the time.
“Now I’m older I’ve accepted that it’s her prerogative to sleep with whoever she wants, but as a mother it was her responsibility to protect her children from seeing things they shouldn’t or being exposed to risk.”
Zoë hadn’t mentioned the fact that Zachary had actually witnessed his mother being unfaithful, but he’d always been protective of his twin and Samantha suspected that he hadn’t told her. She wondered if it would be prudent to tell him that his sister had confided in her.
“My father’s friends were always coming to our house for dinner and drinks when he wasn’t there. I just made sure that Zoë kept her door locked and tried to sleep as lightly as possible, just in case. I was so glad when we both got into Oxford and could leave that damn house.”
Samantha breathed a sigh of relief, thinking that he’d finished. His mother had been careless and indiscreet, but thank God it hadn’t been as bad as she’d imagined.
Her relief was premature.
“I hardly ever came home. I spent the time developing my software ideas. One of my lectures, Professor Stein, thought I had a real flair and worked with me during his free time. Zoë and her friends went to Paris for the summer and I guess I must have been feeling lonely. It was also going to be my mother’s fortieth birthday the next week.”
Oh God, here it comes!
“I still had my keys and because I rarely came home, they weren’t expecting me.”
The only thing that kept Samantha from hyperventilating was the fact that he said ‘they’.
“My mother was dressed in her uniform again. She’s always told us that doing just half an hour of yoga every morning has kept her from gaining any weight since we were born. The men were all wearing pilot uniforms—four of them. My mother was between two of them—and she was giving another one…head. I
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