didn’t understand about the dog. Maybe if you gave him another chance. He could give you a safe life, a—”
“I don’t want that,” Quinn said. “I’ve had a safe life for thirty-five years and I’m tired of it. I want to wake up every morning knowing that something good is coming, that there’s a reason to get out of bed. The same damn thing over and over is not a reason.”
Darla’s eyes narrowed and her jaw grew tighter. “So you change it a little. You do something small, not this huge.”
“I did,” Quinn said. “I adopted Katie.” Katie looked up at her, and she stroked her head to quiet her. “It was such a little thing, but now it’s big because Bill couldn’t see me any way but the way he wanted me. At least Nick sees me.” She thought back to the couch the night before and felt warm again. “Last night he really saw me.”
“He’ll dump you in a year,” Darla said, her voice flat again. “Or he’ll drive you so crazy that you’ll dump him, only this time you’ll lose him as your friend, and he’s the best one you’ve got next to me. If you stay with Bill, you can have them both, but if you do anything about this, you’re going to lose Nick, too. You really want that?”
“I want that feeling again,” Quinn said, stubbornly. “I’m pretty sure Nick doesn’t, but I do. What’s going to happen next year, that’s next year. This is now, and I’m not settling anymore.”
Darla shook her head, looking close to tears. “Quinn—”
“Are things that bad with Max?” Quinn said and regretted it when she saw Darla’s face twist. “Okay, I’m sorry. We’ll talk about it later—”
“I love Max,” Darla said.
“I know you do,” Quinn said.
“I’ve got it all under control,” Darla said. “I’m happy.”
“Absolutely,” Quinn said, nodding.
“I love my life,” Darla said. “My kids are great, my house is beautiful, I enjoy my job, my husband is hard-working and faithful.”
“These are good things,” Quinn said.
“I’m so bored I could scream,” Darla said.
“Right,” Quinn said, relieved it was out. “So what are you going to do?”
“Nothing.” Darla turned to look at her, accusation in her eyes. “I’m not messing up a great relationship just because I’m bored.”
“I didn’t have a great relationship,” Quinn said. “Bill isn’t Max.”
“He sounds like Max,” Darla said glumly. “Oh, hell, forget it, let’s go get you an apartment.”
“Maybe you just need a little change,” Quinn said. “Nothing big, just a one-degree change to shift things a little, to make things new again.” She looked down at Katie on her lap. “Never mind, forget I said that.”
“A little change,” Darla said.
“Little changes have a way of multiplying,” Quinn said. “Maybe—”
“No, I like it.” Darla gripped the steering wheel tighter. “A little change. Just something to make him look at me, like you said.” She turned to meet Quinn’s eyes. “I don’t think he’s looked at me in years. I’m just there, you know? And I haven’t looked at him, either, not really. And then at the station the other night, I wanted to make love in the office—”
“All those windows?” Quinn felt scandalized and intrigued. Making love in front of a window sounded like something Nick would do.
“—and he wouldn’t even consider it. He didn’t even say, ‘Let’s try the bathroom instead,’ he said, ‘After the kids are in bed.’ How bad is that?”
Quinn said, “Well—”
“He couldn’t keep his hands off me once and now he wants to wait?” Darla’s voice rose as her face crumpled. “He doesn‘t even see me anymore.”
“Okay, okay.” Quinn leaned over and patted Darla’s arm. “Okay, we can fix this. We just have to get his attention. I mean, you just have to get his attention.”
“How?” Darla practically snarled the word. “I almost raped him in the office, and he said no. What more—”
“Maybe you were
“I don’t want that,” Quinn said. “I’ve had a safe life for thirty-five years and I’m tired of it. I want to wake up every morning knowing that something good is coming, that there’s a reason to get out of bed. The same damn thing over and over is not a reason.”
Darla’s eyes narrowed and her jaw grew tighter. “So you change it a little. You do something small, not this huge.”
“I did,” Quinn said. “I adopted Katie.” Katie looked up at her, and she stroked her head to quiet her. “It was such a little thing, but now it’s big because Bill couldn’t see me any way but the way he wanted me. At least Nick sees me.” She thought back to the couch the night before and felt warm again. “Last night he really saw me.”
“He’ll dump you in a year,” Darla said, her voice flat again. “Or he’ll drive you so crazy that you’ll dump him, only this time you’ll lose him as your friend, and he’s the best one you’ve got next to me. If you stay with Bill, you can have them both, but if you do anything about this, you’re going to lose Nick, too. You really want that?”
“I want that feeling again,” Quinn said, stubbornly. “I’m pretty sure Nick doesn’t, but I do. What’s going to happen next year, that’s next year. This is now, and I’m not settling anymore.”
Darla shook her head, looking close to tears. “Quinn—”
“Are things that bad with Max?” Quinn said and regretted it when she saw Darla’s face twist. “Okay, I’m sorry. We’ll talk about it later—”
“I love Max,” Darla said.
“I know you do,” Quinn said.
“I’ve got it all under control,” Darla said. “I’m happy.”
“Absolutely,” Quinn said, nodding.
“I love my life,” Darla said. “My kids are great, my house is beautiful, I enjoy my job, my husband is hard-working and faithful.”
“These are good things,” Quinn said.
“I’m so bored I could scream,” Darla said.
“Right,” Quinn said, relieved it was out. “So what are you going to do?”
“Nothing.” Darla turned to look at her, accusation in her eyes. “I’m not messing up a great relationship just because I’m bored.”
“I didn’t have a great relationship,” Quinn said. “Bill isn’t Max.”
“He sounds like Max,” Darla said glumly. “Oh, hell, forget it, let’s go get you an apartment.”
“Maybe you just need a little change,” Quinn said. “Nothing big, just a one-degree change to shift things a little, to make things new again.” She looked down at Katie on her lap. “Never mind, forget I said that.”
“A little change,” Darla said.
“Little changes have a way of multiplying,” Quinn said. “Maybe—”
“No, I like it.” Darla gripped the steering wheel tighter. “A little change. Just something to make him look at me, like you said.” She turned to meet Quinn’s eyes. “I don’t think he’s looked at me in years. I’m just there, you know? And I haven’t looked at him, either, not really. And then at the station the other night, I wanted to make love in the office—”
“All those windows?” Quinn felt scandalized and intrigued. Making love in front of a window sounded like something Nick would do.
“—and he wouldn’t even consider it. He didn’t even say, ‘Let’s try the bathroom instead,’ he said, ‘After the kids are in bed.’ How bad is that?”
Quinn said, “Well—”
“He couldn’t keep his hands off me once and now he wants to wait?” Darla’s voice rose as her face crumpled. “He doesn‘t even see me anymore.”
“Okay, okay.” Quinn leaned over and patted Darla’s arm. “Okay, we can fix this. We just have to get his attention. I mean, you just have to get his attention.”
“How?” Darla practically snarled the word. “I almost raped him in the office, and he said no. What more—”
“Maybe you were
Similar Books
