Commando by Lindsay McKenna Page B

might try to kidnap me. I went to the missionary school over in St. Francis, about fifteen miles from where we lived.”

    “At least your mother protected you,” he said, his voice raspy with emotion. “What did Travers do next?”

    “After he got over the initial rage that his money couldn’t buy us back, I guess my father started feeling guilty about what he’d done to me and my mom, so he sent money for me to go to college. By that time, I didn’t fear him trying to kidnap me, so I took his money and went to Stanford. I got a master’s degree in biology, because I wanted to serve Mother Earth and her people as my mother continues to do in her capacity as a healer at the res.”

    Jake allowed his hand to drop, because he was afraid that if he didn’t he would fold Shah in his arms and hold her, try to protect her against the pain that was clearly etched on her face. When she lifted her chin and stared up at him, he saw the extent of the devastation her father had wreaked upon her.

    “Saying I’m sorry seems useless in the face of what you went through,” he whispered roughly. Travers better hope he never crossed his path again, he thought grimly.

    Shah’s mouth pulled into a slight, pained smile. “Men feel it’s their right to beat women,” she told him bitterly. “When I was at Stanford, I got mixed up in politics. I met my husband, Robert, who’s half Lakota. He’d been raised over at the Pine Ridge reservation. I was so lonely for my people and for our way of life that I let the infatuation go to my head. I married Robert in my third year.”

    “Are you still married?”

    “No.” Shah shook her head sadly. “I repeated my mother’s mistakes. Can you believe that? Robert was an alcoholic, too. At first he used to manipulate me mentally and emotionally. He tried to make me feel unworthy because I was a woman. He thought I should be serving him. Well, that didn’t go over too well with me. By then my mother was a full-fledged medicine woman, and she’d taught me that women are sacred to the Great Spirit.

    “Robert tried to demean me over the next two years. When I wouldn’t break and become a victim, he finally attacked me. The moment he laid a hand on me, I was out of there. I filed for divorce the next day. I wasn’t about to get beat up the way my mother had. Enough was enough.”

    Jake nodded, a bitter taste in his mouth. “Now I understand why you don’t trust men.”

    Shah pulled back and gave him a measuring look. “I have a bad track record,” she agreed. “And I’ve still got a lot of anger toward men that I’m trying to work out,” she warned.

    “Rightfully so,” Jake conceded. He was dying inside, for Shah, for the brutal way she’d been treated.

    Shah weighed his words, the sincerity of them. “I’d like to believe you, but I can’t, Jake.” She gave a helpless shrug. “Too much water under the bridge between me and men. I’ll pack up and leave in about an hour. I don’t want to be a noose around Pai Jose’s neck here. You go home. This isn’t your battle—it’s mine.” With a sad little smile, she added, “After hearing about my life, no man in his right mind would stay around me, anyway.”

    For the first time since his family’s death, Jake felt the numbness leave his heart, all of it. In its wake came a vibrant, living mass of emotions bubbling through him, emotions that were both good and bad. He stared at Shah, unable to put his tangled feelings into words. She’d suffered just as grievously as he had, he realized. Perhaps even more so, because she’d been a child, caught in a trap, with no safe place to hide, and no escape.

    Clearing his throat, he said, “Well, this time you aren’t alone, Shah. We’ll take care of Hernandez together, whether you can trust in me or not.” He wanted to add, You’re too special, Shah, too important, to be putting your neck on the line by yourself. Jake held up his hand when she began to protest.