victimizer.”
“You’re just being melodramatic.”
She slurped her soda, nibbled her pizza.
“It’s not right. People weren’t meant to have this kind of power.”
“Says who?”
“Says everyone.”
Vom shook his head. “Everyone is idiots.”
“Everyone
are
idiots,” corrected Smorgaz. He pursed his lips. “Everyone am idiots?”
“Regardless of whether you were meant to have this kind of power, you have it,” said Vom. “And there’s no way to get rid of it. Are you going to finish that?”
She slid her paper plate across the table. Vom devoured it.
“I know how to get rid of it,” said Smorgaz.
“You do not.” Vom slurped Diana’s soda without asking, then ate the cup.
“Sure, I do. It’s not permanent, but it works.” Smorgaz leaned forward and spoke in a quiet tone. “World peace.”
He sat back with a knowing grin.
“How the hell does that work?” asked Vom.
Smorgaz winked. “It doesn’t.”
Diana used her patient voice. “Can you explain it to the rest of us in a little more detail?”
“It’s simple really. Manipulating reality takes power. Your connection with Vom and myself gives you that power. But it has its limits. Screwing with a few minds here and there, rebuilding department stores, that’s easy. You could do that all day without exhausting yourself. But world peace… that’s a tall order. Trying to make it happen would be like trying to push a mountain with a bulldozer. You’ll run out of gas, but you won’t get results. Unless running out of gas is the result you wanted in the first place.”
“That actually makes sense,” said Vom.
“Why shouldn’t it? I’m not just a mindless spawning machine, y’know.”
A trio of clones budded off his back. Vom caught one and promptly ate it, but the other two bolted across the food court, eliciting surprised yelps from the lunch crowd, who assumed they were rats or puppies or some similar nuisance.
Diana excused herself from the minor chaos and went to the bathroom in order to concentrate. She found an empty stall, sat on the toilet, and cleared her head.
She pictured all the people in all the world getting along, accepting each other’s differences with tolerance and grace. She went the extra mile and pictured everyone holding hands in a grassy field, singing songs, drinking Coca-Cola together. Just living together in a great big harmonious sing-along.
Her gut tightened. A knot formed in her shoulders. She felt queasy, but the power was leaving her, spreading outward, trying to manipulate reality to her desires.
She hit a wall. The nebulous forces she was attempting to unleash flowed back into her.
“Damn it.”
She gritted her teeth. This wasn’t going to be as easy as she’d hoped. Maybe her magical powers were aware of themselves and didn’t want to be wasted. Or possibly reality itself was pushing back, trying to avoid holding the hot potato. She didn’t understand the metaphysics. She just closed her eyes and pushed back.
“Come on…” Her heart beat faster. She could smell burning bacon and hoped it wasn’t coming from her. “… Get happy, damn it.”
The magic stream slowed to a trickle, then stopped altogether. It sloshed between Diana and the universe in a delicate balance. Humming “Imagine,” she exerted every ounce of willpower she had. It was easier now that her body had gone completely numb, and there was nothing to distract her.
“Happy happy, joy joy, you bastards,” she groaned.
The resistance crumbled, and all the magic rushed out of her like a flood. She could actually see it, a rainbow of colors and shapes that twisted and altered reality on a primordial level, deeper than molecules. Deeper than atoms. Even deeper than quarks, gluons, other mysterious science-tastic words Diana had picked up from watching Discovery Channel. It was like reaching underneath all that to get to the core programming at the heart of the video game that was the universe, and using a
“You’re just being melodramatic.”
She slurped her soda, nibbled her pizza.
“It’s not right. People weren’t meant to have this kind of power.”
“Says who?”
“Says everyone.”
Vom shook his head. “Everyone is idiots.”
“Everyone
are
idiots,” corrected Smorgaz. He pursed his lips. “Everyone am idiots?”
“Regardless of whether you were meant to have this kind of power, you have it,” said Vom. “And there’s no way to get rid of it. Are you going to finish that?”
She slid her paper plate across the table. Vom devoured it.
“I know how to get rid of it,” said Smorgaz.
“You do not.” Vom slurped Diana’s soda without asking, then ate the cup.
“Sure, I do. It’s not permanent, but it works.” Smorgaz leaned forward and spoke in a quiet tone. “World peace.”
He sat back with a knowing grin.
“How the hell does that work?” asked Vom.
Smorgaz winked. “It doesn’t.”
Diana used her patient voice. “Can you explain it to the rest of us in a little more detail?”
“It’s simple really. Manipulating reality takes power. Your connection with Vom and myself gives you that power. But it has its limits. Screwing with a few minds here and there, rebuilding department stores, that’s easy. You could do that all day without exhausting yourself. But world peace… that’s a tall order. Trying to make it happen would be like trying to push a mountain with a bulldozer. You’ll run out of gas, but you won’t get results. Unless running out of gas is the result you wanted in the first place.”
“That actually makes sense,” said Vom.
“Why shouldn’t it? I’m not just a mindless spawning machine, y’know.”
A trio of clones budded off his back. Vom caught one and promptly ate it, but the other two bolted across the food court, eliciting surprised yelps from the lunch crowd, who assumed they were rats or puppies or some similar nuisance.
Diana excused herself from the minor chaos and went to the bathroom in order to concentrate. She found an empty stall, sat on the toilet, and cleared her head.
She pictured all the people in all the world getting along, accepting each other’s differences with tolerance and grace. She went the extra mile and pictured everyone holding hands in a grassy field, singing songs, drinking Coca-Cola together. Just living together in a great big harmonious sing-along.
Her gut tightened. A knot formed in her shoulders. She felt queasy, but the power was leaving her, spreading outward, trying to manipulate reality to her desires.
She hit a wall. The nebulous forces she was attempting to unleash flowed back into her.
“Damn it.”
She gritted her teeth. This wasn’t going to be as easy as she’d hoped. Maybe her magical powers were aware of themselves and didn’t want to be wasted. Or possibly reality itself was pushing back, trying to avoid holding the hot potato. She didn’t understand the metaphysics. She just closed her eyes and pushed back.
“Come on…” Her heart beat faster. She could smell burning bacon and hoped it wasn’t coming from her. “… Get happy, damn it.”
The magic stream slowed to a trickle, then stopped altogether. It sloshed between Diana and the universe in a delicate balance. Humming “Imagine,” she exerted every ounce of willpower she had. It was easier now that her body had gone completely numb, and there was nothing to distract her.
“Happy happy, joy joy, you bastards,” she groaned.
The resistance crumbled, and all the magic rushed out of her like a flood. She could actually see it, a rainbow of colors and shapes that twisted and altered reality on a primordial level, deeper than molecules. Deeper than atoms. Even deeper than quarks, gluons, other mysterious science-tastic words Diana had picked up from watching Discovery Channel. It was like reaching underneath all that to get to the core programming at the heart of the video game that was the universe, and using a
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