emerged through the gas. He hung his cloak. “If ye ask me, it’s those wee heathen hormones.”
“It’s...it’s everything,” Addy shouted. “This planet. This baby. That lying bastard.” Searching for something else to throw, she reached for a miniature garden gnome that Duncan, for some reason, kept on the side table.
He scooped it up before she could swipe it.
Addy plopped onto the couch, her head in her hands. “After they shocked me, he said he wouldn’t hurt me. But he did. When I was unconscious, he...he—” She couldn’t say the word. She slumped to her side, dropped her head onto the armrest. “And I was too stupid to even know.”
The cushion compressed under Tess’s added weight. Her soft, rhythmic strokes caressed Addy’s shoulder blades. “I can’t say that I know how you feel. My experience in the breeding box had been different. But please understand you’re not alone. I’m here for you. So is Da and Ferly Mor.”
Addy shot upright. “He’s the damn cause of all this. I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for that...that...thing.” She stormed into the only room offering privacy on the damn planet, and guilt hit her like a blow to the gut. Tess hadn’t deserved her outbursts. She had been nothing but kind and friendly to Addy the entire month she’d been here. Addy had no right to yell at her.
Standing in front of the 3-D mirror, a worn-out, angry woman she barely recognized stared back. Dark circles hung low around tired eyes. Wild strands of strawberry-blonde hair had escaped the confines of her French braid.
Addy lifted her shirt and stroked her belly’s curvature. She couldn’t deny the pregnancy anymore. A baby was most definitely in there, growing, changing, and anchoring her to this Yard. This planet. This bizarre existence.
How had this happened? Disgusted, she pulled down her shirt and sat on the flowerpot lid. She closed her eyes, trying to recall the wildfire and the rapids and anything else she could from that night.
A gray fog rolled into her memory, clouding her thoughts. Why couldn’t she remember anything? Had she been in shock when she’d first seen the alien? Did Ferly Mor abduct her after she’d been knocked unconscious?
Still without answers, Addy exited the bathroom and apologized to Tess before she began cleaning her mess of glass and breakfast juice.
“You said your experience in the breeding box had been different. I’m glad to hear that.”
Tess knelt beside her with a dustpan and broom. “I turned sixteen the day before my first time. I remember being scared thinking about all the stories I’d heard. How some studs jump on top of you right away. Fortunately, the man they paired me with was charming and gentle. We spent the entire night and half the next day talking. On the second night, he reached for me and I didn’t back away. It was lovely.” She blushed pink all the way to her neck.
A twang of jealousy tugged Addy’s heart. Why couldn’t her first time have been...well...totally different? She rested a hand on her belly. “Have you ever resented your children?”
“I’ve never given birth.” Tess’s tone remained neutral. “I always miscarried at nine weeks.”
“I’m sorry.” An awkward silence filled the little space between them. “I don’t know what to say.”
“I know some women don’t want their babies, but I would’ve liked to have one. Even if it was only for a little while.” Tess touched Addy’s arm. Her eyes shone with tenderness. “When it comes,” she began with apparent caution. “If...if you want me to, I can care for the baby.”
Give up her child? Could she do that? Addy had vowed long ago never to make her children feel unwanted or unloved, like her mother had made her feel. She had been determined to protect them from that loneliness. She was not going to wind up like her mother...unmarried, pregnant, and resentful.
She was going to have children when she was ready. There was no way she
“It’s...it’s everything,” Addy shouted. “This planet. This baby. That lying bastard.” Searching for something else to throw, she reached for a miniature garden gnome that Duncan, for some reason, kept on the side table.
He scooped it up before she could swipe it.
Addy plopped onto the couch, her head in her hands. “After they shocked me, he said he wouldn’t hurt me. But he did. When I was unconscious, he...he—” She couldn’t say the word. She slumped to her side, dropped her head onto the armrest. “And I was too stupid to even know.”
The cushion compressed under Tess’s added weight. Her soft, rhythmic strokes caressed Addy’s shoulder blades. “I can’t say that I know how you feel. My experience in the breeding box had been different. But please understand you’re not alone. I’m here for you. So is Da and Ferly Mor.”
Addy shot upright. “He’s the damn cause of all this. I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for that...that...thing.” She stormed into the only room offering privacy on the damn planet, and guilt hit her like a blow to the gut. Tess hadn’t deserved her outbursts. She had been nothing but kind and friendly to Addy the entire month she’d been here. Addy had no right to yell at her.
Standing in front of the 3-D mirror, a worn-out, angry woman she barely recognized stared back. Dark circles hung low around tired eyes. Wild strands of strawberry-blonde hair had escaped the confines of her French braid.
Addy lifted her shirt and stroked her belly’s curvature. She couldn’t deny the pregnancy anymore. A baby was most definitely in there, growing, changing, and anchoring her to this Yard. This planet. This bizarre existence.
How had this happened? Disgusted, she pulled down her shirt and sat on the flowerpot lid. She closed her eyes, trying to recall the wildfire and the rapids and anything else she could from that night.
A gray fog rolled into her memory, clouding her thoughts. Why couldn’t she remember anything? Had she been in shock when she’d first seen the alien? Did Ferly Mor abduct her after she’d been knocked unconscious?
Still without answers, Addy exited the bathroom and apologized to Tess before she began cleaning her mess of glass and breakfast juice.
“You said your experience in the breeding box had been different. I’m glad to hear that.”
Tess knelt beside her with a dustpan and broom. “I turned sixteen the day before my first time. I remember being scared thinking about all the stories I’d heard. How some studs jump on top of you right away. Fortunately, the man they paired me with was charming and gentle. We spent the entire night and half the next day talking. On the second night, he reached for me and I didn’t back away. It was lovely.” She blushed pink all the way to her neck.
A twang of jealousy tugged Addy’s heart. Why couldn’t her first time have been...well...totally different? She rested a hand on her belly. “Have you ever resented your children?”
“I’ve never given birth.” Tess’s tone remained neutral. “I always miscarried at nine weeks.”
“I’m sorry.” An awkward silence filled the little space between them. “I don’t know what to say.”
“I know some women don’t want their babies, but I would’ve liked to have one. Even if it was only for a little while.” Tess touched Addy’s arm. Her eyes shone with tenderness. “When it comes,” she began with apparent caution. “If...if you want me to, I can care for the baby.”
Give up her child? Could she do that? Addy had vowed long ago never to make her children feel unwanted or unloved, like her mother had made her feel. She had been determined to protect them from that loneliness. She was not going to wind up like her mother...unmarried, pregnant, and resentful.
She was going to have children when she was ready. There was no way she
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