yourself.”
She opened a cupboard and took out a glass, then poured herself water from the spigot. After that she opened her purse and fumbled through its contents. She finally took out a medicine vial, then threw a pill in her mouth and chased it with a swig of water.
“What are you taking?”
“The muscle relaxer for my neck.” She massaged her neck and closed her eyes.
“Ali, you don’t need those. You need to quit popping pills and drinking. Sleep at night instead of during the day. See a counselor. See someone who can help you.” He tried to say it as gently as he could, but he wanted to shout it at her. He’d said it over and over again for the last year. “How many different drugs are you taking?”
Her eyes darted out the window and then back to him again—the telltale sign that she was going to lie. “Just this one. I can’t help it. My neck hurts all the time.”
“Sure it does. You rear-ended someone six months ago. Remember?” He wouldn’t forget. Her insurance had skyrocketed. He sighed. “You need help, and I can’t do it anymore. I’m going to fight for Quinn. It’s not going to be pretty this time. I want you out of her life. For good.”
Her cries grew louder. “I’m sorry. I’m trying to do the best I can. I hate being alone to take care of her and have to work too. I’m in constant pain. All you have to think about is yourself. You never talk to me; you never look at me.”
“Ali, we’re divorced. I tried for six years to make it work. It’s not my job to make you happy. You are not my responsibility anymore.”
She reached for his arm. “I need you. I’m sorry. I don’t want to be like”—she hesitated and waved her hands at herself—“this. I hate who I’ve become, but it’s like I don’t know how to stop. I’m in pain all the time. It won’t go away. I want to be a good mother.” She stopped and hiccupped a deep sob.
He shoved his hands in his pocket. All she did was whine. “Yeah, yeah, I know, I’ve heard it before. And I’m sorry for you, but your problems aren’t my problem anymore. I don’t understand them, and I don’t have time for them.” Her blubbering tears had worked once. He’d succumbed to her needs and empathized with her pain. He still did, but after being separated from her for months, it was easier to walk away from the guilt.
He had to force himself to stay calm, refrain from taking her by the shoulders and shaking her. He raised his voice a notch. “Quinn is living with another family—because you neglected her. Do you understand? I can’t accept that—nor should the courts.”
She reached for his arm and squeezed it. “Please! I promise I’ll quit drinking. I’ll go to AA. I want Quinn back too. She’s everything to me. Please, don’t take her away. I have nowhere to go. My mother won’t let me live with her. Please.”
Brett unhooked her hand from his arm and lowered his voice. “I can’t talk about this anymore. It’s nonproductive. I’m sorry for you, but I can’t help you. I have to let the natural consequences happen. Go home and get ready, and I’ll pick you up at 9:45. But after that, I’m done!” He turned and stormed out the door.
Chapter Eleven
Dawn showed its pink-clouded face as twenty-two-year old Nikki pleaded with Justin, her boyfriend, who sat eating his breakfast. “Come on. I watched two hours of football reruns with you on Saturday. You said you’d do this with me.”
Justin sighed and took his last bite of an egg. “You don’t waste time, do you?”
Nikki sat next to him on the sofa tickling his ear with her fingertip. “It’ll be cooler if we go now. Tory said she’s found a hundred and two caches. And hiking is great exercise.”
Justin smiled at Nikki. “You don’t quit.”
She bounced toward him like she was cheering for the winning team. “Yay, you’ll do it?”
Justin stood. “I promised, didn’t I?’
She clapped and moved across the room to her desk. “I
She opened a cupboard and took out a glass, then poured herself water from the spigot. After that she opened her purse and fumbled through its contents. She finally took out a medicine vial, then threw a pill in her mouth and chased it with a swig of water.
“What are you taking?”
“The muscle relaxer for my neck.” She massaged her neck and closed her eyes.
“Ali, you don’t need those. You need to quit popping pills and drinking. Sleep at night instead of during the day. See a counselor. See someone who can help you.” He tried to say it as gently as he could, but he wanted to shout it at her. He’d said it over and over again for the last year. “How many different drugs are you taking?”
Her eyes darted out the window and then back to him again—the telltale sign that she was going to lie. “Just this one. I can’t help it. My neck hurts all the time.”
“Sure it does. You rear-ended someone six months ago. Remember?” He wouldn’t forget. Her insurance had skyrocketed. He sighed. “You need help, and I can’t do it anymore. I’m going to fight for Quinn. It’s not going to be pretty this time. I want you out of her life. For good.”
Her cries grew louder. “I’m sorry. I’m trying to do the best I can. I hate being alone to take care of her and have to work too. I’m in constant pain. All you have to think about is yourself. You never talk to me; you never look at me.”
“Ali, we’re divorced. I tried for six years to make it work. It’s not my job to make you happy. You are not my responsibility anymore.”
She reached for his arm. “I need you. I’m sorry. I don’t want to be like”—she hesitated and waved her hands at herself—“this. I hate who I’ve become, but it’s like I don’t know how to stop. I’m in pain all the time. It won’t go away. I want to be a good mother.” She stopped and hiccupped a deep sob.
He shoved his hands in his pocket. All she did was whine. “Yeah, yeah, I know, I’ve heard it before. And I’m sorry for you, but your problems aren’t my problem anymore. I don’t understand them, and I don’t have time for them.” Her blubbering tears had worked once. He’d succumbed to her needs and empathized with her pain. He still did, but after being separated from her for months, it was easier to walk away from the guilt.
He had to force himself to stay calm, refrain from taking her by the shoulders and shaking her. He raised his voice a notch. “Quinn is living with another family—because you neglected her. Do you understand? I can’t accept that—nor should the courts.”
She reached for his arm and squeezed it. “Please! I promise I’ll quit drinking. I’ll go to AA. I want Quinn back too. She’s everything to me. Please, don’t take her away. I have nowhere to go. My mother won’t let me live with her. Please.”
Brett unhooked her hand from his arm and lowered his voice. “I can’t talk about this anymore. It’s nonproductive. I’m sorry for you, but I can’t help you. I have to let the natural consequences happen. Go home and get ready, and I’ll pick you up at 9:45. But after that, I’m done!” He turned and stormed out the door.
Chapter Eleven
Dawn showed its pink-clouded face as twenty-two-year old Nikki pleaded with Justin, her boyfriend, who sat eating his breakfast. “Come on. I watched two hours of football reruns with you on Saturday. You said you’d do this with me.”
Justin sighed and took his last bite of an egg. “You don’t waste time, do you?”
Nikki sat next to him on the sofa tickling his ear with her fingertip. “It’ll be cooler if we go now. Tory said she’s found a hundred and two caches. And hiking is great exercise.”
Justin smiled at Nikki. “You don’t quit.”
She bounced toward him like she was cheering for the winning team. “Yay, you’ll do it?”
Justin stood. “I promised, didn’t I?’
She clapped and moved across the room to her desk. “I
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