Butterflies in Heat by Darwin Porter Page B

have been a girl," Numie said.
    "I am a girl," she protested. "Want me to prove it?"
    "No, no," he said, fearing another sexual encounter with her. "Guess you are a girl after all"
    She reached over, took a piece of his bacon, held it up in the air for inspection, then devoured it.
    "I want to ask you something," he said. "When did you start dressing up in drag?"
    "I don't dress in drag," she said adamantly. That awful word, would it haunt her forever?
    "Sorry, I didn't mean to make you pissed," he said.
    "My daddy used to let me wear my mama's clothes," she said.
    "That's surprising."
    "No, it wasn't surprising at all. He knew I was really intended as a girl."
    "You told me last night you had brothers. Didn't they think it strange to see their little brother going around dressed up like a lady."
    "Not at all," she said. "I think they rather liked it."
    "You mean, they used you?"
    "Darling, used isn't the word. They gang-banged me every night."
    "They probably did if you went around dressed the part."
    "Daddy was working late one night at the factory, and all three of my brothers came home. They'd been drinking. I pretended to be asleep, but it was no use. I knew what they were going to do. Bill, he was the oldest, hopped on first—right in front of the other two. He was brutal. It took him a long time to get off 'cause of the booze"
    "Did the other two get it on with you, too?"
    "They sure did. Charley was next. I didn't like him at all. He was kinda crude like, worse than Bill. When it was over, Charley thanked Bill. Thanked him, mind you, for the privilege of socking it to me."
    "It was probably Bill's idea"
    "I'm sure. Henry, he's the youngest, asked, 'Bill, can I get in her ass, too'? Henry was just two years younger than me, and wasn't developed at all. But Bill let him. 'Last ... and least', he said, after looking Henry up and down. He couldn't manage, and my brothers laughed at him. By then, Henry was crying."
    "Did the others keep socking it to you?" In a way, he felt sorry for Lola.
    "Until I left home," she said, swallowing bitterly. "I hated them, but what could I do? I was a weak kid. After daddy died, there was no one to protect me. All my brothers used me, my brothers' friends, the guys at school. My voice was too high pitched to be a real boy. Even the girls made fun of me. Her fists closed in determination. "But I swore I'd make this town eat shit one day. Now I'm the Commodore's mistress. I've shown them all!"
    "You can't get even with the past. No one can."
    "All I know is I can go any place in this town—right in the sheriffs office—and nobody makes fun of me no more."
    "How'd you meet up with the Commodore?"
    "In this very bar. He used to have amateur entertainment on Saturday night. I appeared in full regalia one night, a beautiful red silk dress with a white boa. I was stunning, even without the blonde wig. I wore a red one in those days."
    "Like Tangerine?"
    "No," she said, indignant. "I could never be like Tangerine if I tried. She's nothing but a cheap whore."
    "So you put on a show?"
    "I did the bit, 'whatever Lola wants' ... and the crowd went wild. Ever since that night, I've been known as Lola. I added the La Mour, of course. Up to then everybody in my family used old English names."
    "You still didn't tell me how you met the Commodore."
    "He asked if I'd come back and perform the following Saturday night. I did and, of course, I was a sensation. That very night the Commodore asked me up to his place on the keys. He had a beautiful ranch-styled house then. It was later destroyed by a hurricane, and we never bothered to rebuild it."
    "You were his houseboy?"
    "Maid! I've never been nobody's boy, ever. A very, high- class maid at that. He let me dress up in any uniform I wanted. Sometimes I wore nothing around the house but a bra and panties. He always liked that very much. Still does. Before I'd been there a month, I was hiring a maid myself. My brother Bill's mama-in-Iaw." Lola's eyes