for? His hand twisted in the boyâs shirt, then released him, stroking lightly over Elishaâs bruised shoulder. âFor the love of God, boy, youâve got to let this goâcanât you see that?â
âOwainââ I tried again, but Owain slipped from my touch, dropping to one knee before Elisha, touching the cheek where heâd slapped the boy not an hour ago.
Uncertainty edged white in Elishaâs eyes. âIt was an angel I saw, Daânot the Devil. Youâd feel if I were lying.â
Owain winced as if the boyâs words hurt him more. âI believe you, but whatever you saw, give up saying it. I donât care what you say to God in your own heart, but when anybody else can hear you, you keep your mouth shut.â
I took a step back, feeling for the chair, my knees felt so weakâbut I had to draw up my strength, and I told him, âElisha, go quiet the dogs.â
âYes, Mum.â Elisha dodged around his father, slipping out the door. He always had the touch with animals, too, just like his father, even after the Devil. But it was my husbandâs madness I had to face.
âWhat can you mean telling him that?â I folded my arms so he couldnât see me shaking. âYou donât care what he says to God? You donât care for your own sonâs soul? Mary and all her saints preserve us, Owain Farmer, youâre sending your own son into damnation!â
Owain lurched to his feet. âWhere else can I send him, EdithâIâm already there.â His fingers knotted through his hair, his chest shuddering with every breath.
I did find the chair, then, sliding into it without taking my eyes off of my husband. I crossed myself as careful as Easter. Father John had praised me: somehow, I would have the strength to face this. âWhat are you saying, Owain?â
But he only shook his head, his loose hair tumbling against his shoulders.
I clasped my fingers in prayer, pleading for my husband to come back to me. Weâd been a love match from the startâor so I thoughtâuntil these last few months. âIf you believe yourself beyond even the redemption of our Lord, Owain, then let Elisha go. Let him be taken to the abbey. How can the discipline of a damned soul ever serve to raise a child?â
âYou would so easily let him go?â
Every word he said seemed spoken by a stranger, and I searched for the clues to his madness. âTo serve God? Not easily, but I would. Whatâs come over you, Owain? Tell me you donât want our sonâs soul in torment.â
âMine is!â he shot back. âMine is in torment! By God, Edith, I thought to save him! You donât know how hard Iâve tried to keep from tainting my family. I never shouldâve had children.â
That hurt me from my heart to my loins, I tell you. Tears burned at my eyes, but I held back. âWe donât have to have more children, Owain.â I wanted them, to be sure, and I wanted the pleasure of the marriage bed. I always thought the fault was mine that we had only two who lived. âEven if Elisha goesââ
âIf that priest takes him, Edith, weâll never see him again.â
âFor the good of the Lord, and the good of his soul, Owain.â And yours, I wanted to say, for I could see the boyâs madness tearing at his fatherâs heart. If Elisha went, and took his madness to the abbey, it might be the saving of all of us, if it brought back the husband I knew.
âYou donât understand, Edith! Father Johnâheâs like them, the ones that burned the witch! He doesnât think Elisha can be saved at all, didnât you see that?â
I remembered the compassion of the priestâs look, and the faith he placed in me. I swallowed and spent a minute to collect myself, but my hands kneaded my apron as I spoke. âYou believe Father John will burn our son.â
Owain sighed
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