Breathless by Cole Gibsen Page B

weak. This is why we’re able to keep their jaws closed with almost no effort at al . See?” He dropped his hand from the gator’s snout so that my hand was the only thing keeping it shut.
    “Oh my God,” I whispered. I was holding an al igator’s jaw shut. Me! And on top of that, I was stil alive!
    “You’re doing great,” Bastin said. With his free hand, he guided my arm under the al igator’s body at the base of its tail. The al igator twitched once and went stil . “Okay, are you ready for this?”
    I swal owed. “I trust you.”
    “No.” He leaned his head over my shoulder so that his cheek was next to mine. “Do you trust yourself?”
    I couldn’t answer right away. My head spun from Bastin’s nearness. What exactly was I supposed to trust myself to do? Keep my grip on the al igator? Try not to die? Or something more? “I-I think so.”
    “Good. Because it’s al you, now.” He dropped his arms, stepped back, and left me alone, with a struggling al igator in my arms.
    My heart leapt inside my throat, thick and hard. But, despite my inability to breath, I held on. “I’m doing it.” I wasn’t sure who I was talking to; me, Bastin, or even the al igator. I pivoted on my feet so I could face Bastin. The gator writhed and twisted, but I held on. “I can’t believe this. I’m doing it!”
    I laughed out loud.
    Bastin laughed, too, but held his hands up. “Careful where you point that thing. It’s loaded.”
    “This is amazing!” In my hands, I held a creature that wanted me dead. And yet I was okay. For the first time in my entire life, I felt strong—almost invincible.
    “Are you afraid?” he asked.
    “No.” My heart hopped inside my chest like a bunny with ADHD, but I wasn’t afraid. In fact, I felt like I’d lived more in this moment than I had in my entire life.
    “Why do you think that is?”
    “Because . . .” But I wasn’t sure why. The animal in my arms could easily kil me. That alone should have my knees quaking. But I felt elated. That, if it wasn’t for the added weight from the reptile in my arms, I might just soar into the sky. “Because I can handle it.”
    He nodded and held out his hands. I placed the al igator back into them. When I was sure Bastin had the reptile firmly in his grip, I let go. “That’s not the only thing you can handle,” he said. “Don’t forget that.” He turned, stepped onto the dock, and walked to the edge where he dropped the reptile back into the water. It swam away without a backward glance.
    With the al igator safely back in the water, I couldn’t help myself. I ran down the dock and threw my arms around Bastin’s waist, pressing my cheek into the hol ow of his neck. No one had ever forced me to examine who I real y was on the inside. I was used to being torn down by Sir’s snide comments and threats. I’d thought I was weak. But that wasn’t true. Before this moment, before Bastin came into my world, I’d never realized the strength I had. “Thank you,” I whispered against his chest.
    He tensed, his arms rigid at his side. For a moment, I wondered if I’d made a mistake by hugging him. But, slowly, Bastin relaxed and returned my embrace by wrapping his arms around my shoulders. “You’re welcome.”
    We stayed that way for a long time. Me, not wanting to let go, and Bastin not making me. I couldn’t remember a time when I’d been held so close or felt as safe as I did in that moment. I never wanted it to end. It wasn’t until exhaustion got the better of me that I felt myself being lifted and carried down the dock. As hard as I tried, I couldn’t keep my eyes opened, and I worried that if I fel asleep, when I final y woke, I’d discover that Bastin had only been a dream.
    But then I heard the words, “I real y like you, Edith,” whispered from a distance. I couldn’t be sure that I’d heard them correctly, so I pried my eyes open just in time to see Bastin slip through the sliding glass door of my bedroom. Only