Breathless by Jessica Warman Page B

thanks.”
    “I mean it. I won’t tell anyone anything, and I’ll wake you up when you have nightmares.” Finally, I reach out to close my hand over her wrist. She doesn’t pull away. “It’ll be okay.”
    She leans toward me and starts to cry again. Before I have time to understand what’s happening, she burrows her head against my shoulder and sobs. It goes on and on, until finally the sobs turn to deep, heavy breaths. I keep my arms around her as we sit there, imagining that I can absorb some of the pain she’s feeling, that I can somehow give her some relief.
    After what feels like forever, Mazzie abruptly stops crying. She sits up straight, wipes the hair from her eyes, and says, “I don’t want to talk about this anymore.”
    I nod. “Okay.”
    She finds her mouth guard among the covers, reaches toward me, and uses the corner of my T-shirt to wipe it off.
    “Let’s go to bed, Katie.”
    “Okay.” I climb down the ladder and get into my own bed. But I can’t sleep. I lie awake for the next few hours, until the first signs of light appear beneath our blinds, listening to Mazzie. She still grinds her teeth, but otherwise, for the first time all school year, she’s quiet.
    After that night, Mazzie makes herself scarce for a while. I don’t even see her at breakfast or lunch. I’m tempted to try and find her, to check under the sink every time I’m in the bathroom during school, but I don’t. I figure she’ll come to me when she’s ready.
    A few weeks later, I’m eating lunch with Lindsey and Estella. The three of us seem more comfortable together now. Sometimes I feel like Lindsey and Estella are both relieved to have someone to talk to besides each other.
    Lindsey is chewing on a piece of her hair, looking over her bio notes for the test she has after lunch. Estella is just about to dig into her second piece of chocolate cake. I’m glancing across the room, stealing looks at Drew, when out of nowhere, Mazzie plops her tray down beside me and takes a seat.
    We all look at her, startled.
    “Well, well, well,” Estella says, chewing with her mouth open. “If it isn’t Katie’s missing roommate.”
    Mazzie’s nervous; I can tell by the way she brushes the hair from her eyes. There’s a slight tremble to her fingers as she picks up her fork. But nobody else seems to notice.
    “You’re Stetson’s girlfriend, right?” Mazzie asks.
    Estella nods, grinning.
    “What is he, like, your trophy boyfriend?”
    Estella’s grin widens. “That’s right.”
    Mazzie nods, satisfied. She appears to relax a little bit. I’ve noticed that she’s always at her most comfortable when she’s on the offensive. “So you form personal relationships based almost totally on physical appearance.”
    For the first time that I’ve ever seen, Estella appears at a loss for words—but only for a second. She licks icing from her fork. “It’s like my father always says,” she tells Mazzie, “it’s not how you feel on the inside that counts; it’s how you look on the outside.”
    Mazzie looks Estella up and down. “Sounds like a great way to live.”
    Estella grins again. “I think so.” To me, she says, “I like her, Katie.”
    “I’m so glad you’re here,” I tell Mazzie, almost breathless. “We’re always hoping you’ll eat with us, so it’s great you fi-nally—”
    “Katie. Keep your panties on. I’m just hungry, that’s all.” She gives an exaggerated sigh. “I guess if I have to eat with someone, it might as well be you.”
    “You don’t have to eat with anyone,” Lindsey says. “You could always eat alone if you wanted to.”
    “Shut up, ” Estella says, and I feel the table shift as she kicks Lindsey under it. “She’s eating with us from now on.” She looks at Mazzie expectantly. “Aren’t you?”
    Mazzie hesitates for only a second. “Sure.”
    “You’re kind of a mystery—just like Katie!” Lindsey continues, oblivious to the delicacy of the situation. “Where did