wrong.” Noelle stared at him and Blue winced.
“No, you heard it right. Alexandra had two daughters, both of them mine.”
“And they’re here?” She seemed just as floored as he was.
“Yeah, they’re sleeping in one of the guest rooms.”
“Oh my god.” Her legs failed her and she collapsed onto the edge of the bed. “I don’t…I can’t…I can’t…”
“I know.” Blue sat down next to her and took her hand. “Crazy, right?”
“What are you going to do?” She was pale and there were tears standing in her eyes.
“I’ll have to keep them.” He shrugged, helpless to do anything else. “I can’t send them back to that crazy bitch and I couldn’t bring myself to put any child of mine into the social care system, so there’s no other option.”
“They can’t stay here.” She whispered. “It’s not right.”
“I know.” Blue pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to stem the headache that was blooming. “I was wondering if we could stay at yours until we decide what the hell to do. If I need to buy a house, it’s going to take me a couple of months to get everything in order.”
“Of course.” She didn’t even hesitate. “It’s all ready , apart from the carpet in my bedroom, so we’ll take them there tomorrow.” It seemed like her brain had finally come back on track and kicked into gear. “We’ll need to get them clothes and we’ll need to buy food. The kitchen has all my utensils in it but there’s nothing to eat. I don’t think the fridge is even switched on. Have you got any clients scheduled tomorrow?”
“Only one in the morning, but I can try and-…”
“No, you take your appointment. I’ll take them clothes shopping in the morning and then I can get the food after lunch. You don’t want to know all the vagaries of little girl’s clothes shopping and I’m sure they’ll be tired and won’t want to follow me around the supermarket.”
“You can’t take a camera crew to the supermarket.” Why the hell were they talking about the supermarket?
“Why not? They want a glance into my life – I have to eat and shop the same as everyone else.” He refrained from pointing out that she could eat all her meals at the Manor if she wanted to and never lift a finger again in her life.
“I can’t believe this is happening.” His shoulders slumped. “I keep thinking it’s going to sink in any minute now, but my whole body has just been churning internally for the last four hours. It’s so surreal I feel almost…numb somehow.”
“What are they like?” She squeezed his hand and a lump rose in his throat.
“Tired. Scared. Hungry. Lisette almost cleaned out the kitchen when we got here. God knows when they last ate. She called Alexandra a crazy lying bitch.”
“Ar e they beautiful?” She prompted and he knew she was trying to make him smile and make some joke about how they were his so of course they were, but it had the opposite effect. To his horror, Blue just burst into tears. His whole life had derailed like a freight train the moment he’d stepped into that apartment. He’d dared to dream just briefly of a life with Noelle, one in which they maybe had a family somewhere way down the line, and now he was going to lose all of it. He knew she had a big heart, but this was too much for anyone to take under the circumstances. He’d known from the start she’d be a hard sell. Now he had baggage, it wasn’t fair to even try.
He didn’t know anything about being a father. He didn’t know anything about buying a house or organising schools or even having to fend for himself. Cal had cared for him since the day he’d rescued Blue from Alexandra. He’d never had to go it alone and it was terrifying. He’d never been so scared in his life. If he failed at any of it, he’d ruin the two girls who now depended on him.
He felt like that fifteen year old boy again – cast out and adrift with no clue what the future held.
“You’re going to be a
“No, you heard it right. Alexandra had two daughters, both of them mine.”
“And they’re here?” She seemed just as floored as he was.
“Yeah, they’re sleeping in one of the guest rooms.”
“Oh my god.” Her legs failed her and she collapsed onto the edge of the bed. “I don’t…I can’t…I can’t…”
“I know.” Blue sat down next to her and took her hand. “Crazy, right?”
“What are you going to do?” She was pale and there were tears standing in her eyes.
“I’ll have to keep them.” He shrugged, helpless to do anything else. “I can’t send them back to that crazy bitch and I couldn’t bring myself to put any child of mine into the social care system, so there’s no other option.”
“They can’t stay here.” She whispered. “It’s not right.”
“I know.” Blue pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to stem the headache that was blooming. “I was wondering if we could stay at yours until we decide what the hell to do. If I need to buy a house, it’s going to take me a couple of months to get everything in order.”
“Of course.” She didn’t even hesitate. “It’s all ready , apart from the carpet in my bedroom, so we’ll take them there tomorrow.” It seemed like her brain had finally come back on track and kicked into gear. “We’ll need to get them clothes and we’ll need to buy food. The kitchen has all my utensils in it but there’s nothing to eat. I don’t think the fridge is even switched on. Have you got any clients scheduled tomorrow?”
“Only one in the morning, but I can try and-…”
“No, you take your appointment. I’ll take them clothes shopping in the morning and then I can get the food after lunch. You don’t want to know all the vagaries of little girl’s clothes shopping and I’m sure they’ll be tired and won’t want to follow me around the supermarket.”
“You can’t take a camera crew to the supermarket.” Why the hell were they talking about the supermarket?
“Why not? They want a glance into my life – I have to eat and shop the same as everyone else.” He refrained from pointing out that she could eat all her meals at the Manor if she wanted to and never lift a finger again in her life.
“I can’t believe this is happening.” His shoulders slumped. “I keep thinking it’s going to sink in any minute now, but my whole body has just been churning internally for the last four hours. It’s so surreal I feel almost…numb somehow.”
“What are they like?” She squeezed his hand and a lump rose in his throat.
“Tired. Scared. Hungry. Lisette almost cleaned out the kitchen when we got here. God knows when they last ate. She called Alexandra a crazy lying bitch.”
“Ar e they beautiful?” She prompted and he knew she was trying to make him smile and make some joke about how they were his so of course they were, but it had the opposite effect. To his horror, Blue just burst into tears. His whole life had derailed like a freight train the moment he’d stepped into that apartment. He’d dared to dream just briefly of a life with Noelle, one in which they maybe had a family somewhere way down the line, and now he was going to lose all of it. He knew she had a big heart, but this was too much for anyone to take under the circumstances. He’d known from the start she’d be a hard sell. Now he had baggage, it wasn’t fair to even try.
He didn’t know anything about being a father. He didn’t know anything about buying a house or organising schools or even having to fend for himself. Cal had cared for him since the day he’d rescued Blue from Alexandra. He’d never had to go it alone and it was terrifying. He’d never been so scared in his life. If he failed at any of it, he’d ruin the two girls who now depended on him.
He felt like that fifteen year old boy again – cast out and adrift with no clue what the future held.
“You’re going to be a
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