couldn’t bear it.
“You know, when I was your age all I could think about was being a rock star, playing music to scads of screaming fans every night.” Jake sighed. “It was a good dream and I suppose I had a shot at making it, but I gave it up. At first, I didn’t want to let go of the dream. I resented being forced by circumstances to make the choices that I did. But you know, in the end, they were my choices. I could have sold the studio and walked away to pursue my dreams, but I didn’t. I gave in to my father’s final wishes by my own choice.”
“You could be great, Jake.”
Finn’s hoarse words held an edge that told Jake his submissive held himself together by a very thin thread. He slipped an arm over Finn’s shoulders, feeling the slight tremors of the younger man’s body and the tension that drew him tight as a bow.
“Maybe. Maybe not. It’s a tough business and not many people make it.” Jake shrugged. “You’re right. I could still try and maybe I’d make it even though it’s kind of a long shot for a guy in his thirties to become a rock star.”
“You would be so amazing,” Finn whispered.
Jake tightened his arm around his still trembling lover. “I would be amazing for you, Finn.”
The head of silky white hair lifted. Pale gray eyes damp with tears gazed up at him and in that instant Jake saw everything in Finn’s heart. A love so huge and pure it made Jake’s breath catch in his throat. Fear so great it caused the slender form beneath his arm to shake uncontrollably. And in the depths of those beautiful eyes, a tiny infinitesimal spark of hope.
Jake smiled at his lover and bent to brush a sweet kiss to his lips. He held Finn’s pointed chin in hand, his thumb stroking the sharp edge of Finn’s jaw.
“I don’t want the dreams of my twenties,” he whispered against Finn’s mouth. “My dreams have changed.”
Tears shimmered, threatening to spill over. “What do you want now?”
The quaver in his submissive’s voice told Jake just how much Finn wanted and feared the answer to his question. He pulled Finn closer, crushing the boy in his arms.
“I want you, Finn.” Jake nuzzled the tender skin of Finn’s temple. “I’m happy here in the studio or, at least, I am now that you’re here.”
“B-but you’re destined to make great music,” Finn protested.
Jake nodded. “I am. But not on a stage in front of thousands of screaming fans. I’m destined to make great music with you. I’ve found a huge satisfaction in writing and playing music with you. Not to mention the fact that you’re the most amazing submissive I’ve ever had. I’d be a fool to let you go.”
Finn stared at Jake with shock widened eyes. “I thought you would become famous and you wouldn’t want me anymore. I thought you’d turn me out. I thought that’s what pushing me to finish Juilliard was all about.” Each word tore from Finn’s throat, steeped in dark pain.
Jake stood and scooped his lover up in his arms, letting Finn wind long arms and legs around his body. Walking into the booth with his submissive clinging to him like a limpet, Jake eased down onto the leather sofa and held Finn close, smiling as the boy— he really couldn’t think of him as anything else despite the fact that he was clearly a man— buried his face in Jake’s neck.
“Finn, do you trust me?” Jake asked, his hands stroking up the submissive’s back.
“Yes, sir.”
The words were muffled but Jake still heard them.
“I know your story, sweetness. I know that everyone you’ve ever trusted or loved has turned away from you.” Finn shivered in Jake’s arms and a spike of anger at Finn’s family and his former master sent heat spiraling through Jake. “I’m not them. I know what a treasure I hold in my arms. I won’t ever let you go, Finn. I love you.”
The little shivers and shakes abruptly stopped. Finn’s body became very still. Finally, he raised his head and sat up on Jake’s lap. Dove gray eyes searched
“You know, when I was your age all I could think about was being a rock star, playing music to scads of screaming fans every night.” Jake sighed. “It was a good dream and I suppose I had a shot at making it, but I gave it up. At first, I didn’t want to let go of the dream. I resented being forced by circumstances to make the choices that I did. But you know, in the end, they were my choices. I could have sold the studio and walked away to pursue my dreams, but I didn’t. I gave in to my father’s final wishes by my own choice.”
“You could be great, Jake.”
Finn’s hoarse words held an edge that told Jake his submissive held himself together by a very thin thread. He slipped an arm over Finn’s shoulders, feeling the slight tremors of the younger man’s body and the tension that drew him tight as a bow.
“Maybe. Maybe not. It’s a tough business and not many people make it.” Jake shrugged. “You’re right. I could still try and maybe I’d make it even though it’s kind of a long shot for a guy in his thirties to become a rock star.”
“You would be so amazing,” Finn whispered.
Jake tightened his arm around his still trembling lover. “I would be amazing for you, Finn.”
The head of silky white hair lifted. Pale gray eyes damp with tears gazed up at him and in that instant Jake saw everything in Finn’s heart. A love so huge and pure it made Jake’s breath catch in his throat. Fear so great it caused the slender form beneath his arm to shake uncontrollably. And in the depths of those beautiful eyes, a tiny infinitesimal spark of hope.
Jake smiled at his lover and bent to brush a sweet kiss to his lips. He held Finn’s pointed chin in hand, his thumb stroking the sharp edge of Finn’s jaw.
“I don’t want the dreams of my twenties,” he whispered against Finn’s mouth. “My dreams have changed.”
Tears shimmered, threatening to spill over. “What do you want now?”
The quaver in his submissive’s voice told Jake just how much Finn wanted and feared the answer to his question. He pulled Finn closer, crushing the boy in his arms.
“I want you, Finn.” Jake nuzzled the tender skin of Finn’s temple. “I’m happy here in the studio or, at least, I am now that you’re here.”
“B-but you’re destined to make great music,” Finn protested.
Jake nodded. “I am. But not on a stage in front of thousands of screaming fans. I’m destined to make great music with you. I’ve found a huge satisfaction in writing and playing music with you. Not to mention the fact that you’re the most amazing submissive I’ve ever had. I’d be a fool to let you go.”
Finn stared at Jake with shock widened eyes. “I thought you would become famous and you wouldn’t want me anymore. I thought you’d turn me out. I thought that’s what pushing me to finish Juilliard was all about.” Each word tore from Finn’s throat, steeped in dark pain.
Jake stood and scooped his lover up in his arms, letting Finn wind long arms and legs around his body. Walking into the booth with his submissive clinging to him like a limpet, Jake eased down onto the leather sofa and held Finn close, smiling as the boy— he really couldn’t think of him as anything else despite the fact that he was clearly a man— buried his face in Jake’s neck.
“Finn, do you trust me?” Jake asked, his hands stroking up the submissive’s back.
“Yes, sir.”
The words were muffled but Jake still heard them.
“I know your story, sweetness. I know that everyone you’ve ever trusted or loved has turned away from you.” Finn shivered in Jake’s arms and a spike of anger at Finn’s family and his former master sent heat spiraling through Jake. “I’m not them. I know what a treasure I hold in my arms. I won’t ever let you go, Finn. I love you.”
The little shivers and shakes abruptly stopped. Finn’s body became very still. Finally, he raised his head and sat up on Jake’s lap. Dove gray eyes searched
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