And her lack of self-esteem and their constantly picking on her and criticizing her didn't help her with that problem. They were never proud of her or satisfied with what she was doing, although both of her parents had said they were proud when she graduated from Northwestern. They just wished it had been UCLA or USC, and that she had found a different job than the one in New York, preferably one in L.A. in a different line of work. Whatever she did was never right or enough for them. And they never seemed to realize how painful their constant criticism was for her, or that it was why she no longer wanted to live in L.A. She wanted to put a whole country between them. That way she only had to see them at Thanksgiving and Christmas, and maybe one day she wouldn't go home for those either. But for now, she wanted to be with Gracie. Once Gracie left home, Victoria wasn't sure when she'd go home or how often. They had succeeded in driving her away and didn't even know it.
She and Gracie got in the back of the car on the way home from the airport. Their parents were talking in the front seat about what they were going to do for dinner. Jim offered to barbecue some steaks in the backyard, and he turned toward the backseat and winked at his older daughter. "I don't need to ask you, I know you're hungry. What about you, G, how do steaks sound for dinner?" he asked Gracie. Victoria stared out the window, looking like she'd been punched in the stomach. That was the reputation she had here, and the image they had of her, the one who was always hungry.
"Steaks sound fine, Dad," Gracie said vaguely. "We can order Chinese if you don't feel like making barbecue, or Victoria and I can go out for dinner if you and Mom are tired." They both would have preferred it but didn't want to insult their parents. And Jim insisted that he was happy to barbecue, as long as he and Victoria wouldn't be the only ones eating. It was the second shot he had taken at her in five minutes. It was going to be a long summer if this was how it started. It was a reminder to her that nothing had changed. Four years away at college, and a diploma, and they still treated her like the resident uncontrollable eater.
They sat in the backyard that night and ate dinner. Christine decided to skip the steak and just ate salad. She said she'd eaten too much on the plane, and Grace and Victoria ate the steaks their father had made. Grace helped herself to a baked potato, but Victoria didn't, and just put salad on her plate with the steak.
"Are you sick?" her father said with a straight face. "I've never seen you turn down a potato."
"I'm fine, Dad," Victoria said quietly. She didn't enjoy the comment, and she had decided to start her latest diet the moment she got home. She stuck to it, even though they offered her ice cream for dessert, and would have commented on that too if she'd said yes.
After dinner the two girls sat in Gracie's room, listening to music. Although Gracie's taste was younger and wilder, they shared lots of things in common. Victoria was happy to be at home with her.
They spent a lot of time together that summer, once Grace got out of school, a few weeks after Victoria's graduation. The family went to Santa Barbara for the long weekend of Memorial Day. And after they got back, Victoria drove Gracie everywhere. She became her personal chauffeur and companion, and the girls were inseparable for two months. Victoria saw some of her old school friends who had come back to L.A. after graduation, or stayed to go to school there. She didn't have a lot of close friends, but it was nice to see familiar faces, particularly before she moved away. Two were going on to graduate school, and she thought she'd like to do that one day herself, but at NYU or Columbia. She saw several of the boys she'd known at school, who'd never paid particular attention to her. One of them asked her out for dinner and a movie, but they didn't have much to say to each other. He had gone
She and Gracie got in the back of the car on the way home from the airport. Their parents were talking in the front seat about what they were going to do for dinner. Jim offered to barbecue some steaks in the backyard, and he turned toward the backseat and winked at his older daughter. "I don't need to ask you, I know you're hungry. What about you, G, how do steaks sound for dinner?" he asked Gracie. Victoria stared out the window, looking like she'd been punched in the stomach. That was the reputation she had here, and the image they had of her, the one who was always hungry.
"Steaks sound fine, Dad," Gracie said vaguely. "We can order Chinese if you don't feel like making barbecue, or Victoria and I can go out for dinner if you and Mom are tired." They both would have preferred it but didn't want to insult their parents. And Jim insisted that he was happy to barbecue, as long as he and Victoria wouldn't be the only ones eating. It was the second shot he had taken at her in five minutes. It was going to be a long summer if this was how it started. It was a reminder to her that nothing had changed. Four years away at college, and a diploma, and they still treated her like the resident uncontrollable eater.
They sat in the backyard that night and ate dinner. Christine decided to skip the steak and just ate salad. She said she'd eaten too much on the plane, and Grace and Victoria ate the steaks their father had made. Grace helped herself to a baked potato, but Victoria didn't, and just put salad on her plate with the steak.
"Are you sick?" her father said with a straight face. "I've never seen you turn down a potato."
"I'm fine, Dad," Victoria said quietly. She didn't enjoy the comment, and she had decided to start her latest diet the moment she got home. She stuck to it, even though they offered her ice cream for dessert, and would have commented on that too if she'd said yes.
After dinner the two girls sat in Gracie's room, listening to music. Although Gracie's taste was younger and wilder, they shared lots of things in common. Victoria was happy to be at home with her.
They spent a lot of time together that summer, once Grace got out of school, a few weeks after Victoria's graduation. The family went to Santa Barbara for the long weekend of Memorial Day. And after they got back, Victoria drove Gracie everywhere. She became her personal chauffeur and companion, and the girls were inseparable for two months. Victoria saw some of her old school friends who had come back to L.A. after graduation, or stayed to go to school there. She didn't have a lot of close friends, but it was nice to see familiar faces, particularly before she moved away. Two were going on to graduate school, and she thought she'd like to do that one day herself, but at NYU or Columbia. She saw several of the boys she'd known at school, who'd never paid particular attention to her. One of them asked her out for dinner and a movie, but they didn't have much to say to each other. He had gone
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