dimensions, no doubt, by over-priced cottage cheese
and dysentery, and weighed down by heavy Nepalese jewelry and the burden of
sailing consort with this goddess.
Olga the Goddess turned out to be Norwegian and she was a
computer programmer. Wolfe, on the other hand, was German and had an obvious
love of uniforms, sticking out of a grimy tank-top the way he did, and
affecting baggy purple-and-green-striped pantaloons. He was a real-estate dealer
from Hamburg.
“Can you tell us which bus we should take to get to the
Burmese Embassy tomorrow?” Olga’s voice fluted and furred and so befuddled me I
couldn’t get the right bus number out before Eddie did. He offered this number
as though it were a priceless pearl, his eyes so wide and earnest I could see
statuesque Nordic beauties reflected on their glistening orbs.
Eddie seemed quite impressed with this new guest, in fact,
and you got the idea he would by no means want to see her gunned down on Khao
San Road or on any other road either, come to that. Lek, on the other hand, was
lurking in the doorway like a Ninja at work, and when Eddie called for beer I
just sat there in awe of his nerve. Even the birds were silent — the calm
before the storm.
Eddie got his own beer and, when the guests said in
response to his offer, “Oh, no; it’s too expensive in Thailand”, he said “Don’t worry; it’s on me” and I said “Have you got a Kloster Beer?” thinking I
didn’ t want to be entirely sober when Lek finally decided to go into action.
“When are you going to Burma?” asked Eddie in a faint
voice, having chugged the better part of a beer in a fine display of this manly
art.
“Excuse me; what did you say?” Wolfe craned towards Eddie,
politely pushing a shaggy mop away from the nearer ear. Olga also leaned
forward attentively, her batiked shirtfront, you had to notice, falling away
from her abundant bosom.
Eddie repeated his question, and they told him five days.
“We came from Koh Samui, and Tuesday we go to Burma,” said Olga.
“Ja, ja. Burma,” added Wolfe.
“How was the weather on Koh Samui?” Eddie asked very sofdy.
“What? What did you say?” Olga leaned forward again.
Suddenly Eddie straightened up so fast he almost went over
backwards. “Ah, Lek. Hi. I was just talking to these guests, here,” he said,
looking vaguely all around — everywhere, in fact, except at the bra-less beauty
whom, he would have had you believe, he hadn’t noticed yet. Lek merely
collected the coffee cups and returned to the house without comment. But then I
didn’t expect her to compliment Olga on what was pretty clearly an all-over
tan.
I finished my beer and said I had to go downtown on some
business. Sure, I told Eddie, when he asked me: I’d pick up his provisions at
Foodland; it was on my way. I’d come back with the stuff before dinner.
Wolfe insisted on shaking my hand and saying good-bye, but
Olga remained largely oblivious to me. Eddie was telling her about a really
interesting place in Burma, not too far from Pagan, but off the beaten path,
nevertheless.
When I came back a couple of hours later, I could smell
Eddie’s Burma cheroots, and I knew he must have taken on a fair load of Dutch
courage, because in the normal course of events Lek wouldn’ t have let him
smoke one of those things in the Cheri-Tone or even fifty meters upwind of the
place.
Eddie was surrounded, now, by several uniformed vagabonds,
though Olga had situated herself close enough to surround him all by herself.
It turned out, according to the account I got a couple of days later, he’d quickly
established his supremacy in this little herd, no matter he was sporting a
rumpled but clean khaki safari suit and laced leather shoes. Where this guy had
done that, for example, Eddie’d aced him with six months in Kathmandu in 1967. Where that guy, on the other hand, had been there, Eddie had
trumped him with a hike through northern India back when villagers didn’t even
know
and dysentery, and weighed down by heavy Nepalese jewelry and the burden of
sailing consort with this goddess.
Olga the Goddess turned out to be Norwegian and she was a
computer programmer. Wolfe, on the other hand, was German and had an obvious
love of uniforms, sticking out of a grimy tank-top the way he did, and
affecting baggy purple-and-green-striped pantaloons. He was a real-estate dealer
from Hamburg.
“Can you tell us which bus we should take to get to the
Burmese Embassy tomorrow?” Olga’s voice fluted and furred and so befuddled me I
couldn’t get the right bus number out before Eddie did. He offered this number
as though it were a priceless pearl, his eyes so wide and earnest I could see
statuesque Nordic beauties reflected on their glistening orbs.
Eddie seemed quite impressed with this new guest, in fact,
and you got the idea he would by no means want to see her gunned down on Khao
San Road or on any other road either, come to that. Lek, on the other hand, was
lurking in the doorway like a Ninja at work, and when Eddie called for beer I
just sat there in awe of his nerve. Even the birds were silent — the calm
before the storm.
Eddie got his own beer and, when the guests said in
response to his offer, “Oh, no; it’s too expensive in Thailand”, he said “Don’t worry; it’s on me” and I said “Have you got a Kloster Beer?” thinking I
didn’ t want to be entirely sober when Lek finally decided to go into action.
“When are you going to Burma?” asked Eddie in a faint
voice, having chugged the better part of a beer in a fine display of this manly
art.
“Excuse me; what did you say?” Wolfe craned towards Eddie,
politely pushing a shaggy mop away from the nearer ear. Olga also leaned
forward attentively, her batiked shirtfront, you had to notice, falling away
from her abundant bosom.
Eddie repeated his question, and they told him five days.
“We came from Koh Samui, and Tuesday we go to Burma,” said Olga.
“Ja, ja. Burma,” added Wolfe.
“How was the weather on Koh Samui?” Eddie asked very sofdy.
“What? What did you say?” Olga leaned forward again.
Suddenly Eddie straightened up so fast he almost went over
backwards. “Ah, Lek. Hi. I was just talking to these guests, here,” he said,
looking vaguely all around — everywhere, in fact, except at the bra-less beauty
whom, he would have had you believe, he hadn’t noticed yet. Lek merely
collected the coffee cups and returned to the house without comment. But then I
didn’t expect her to compliment Olga on what was pretty clearly an all-over
tan.
I finished my beer and said I had to go downtown on some
business. Sure, I told Eddie, when he asked me: I’d pick up his provisions at
Foodland; it was on my way. I’d come back with the stuff before dinner.
Wolfe insisted on shaking my hand and saying good-bye, but
Olga remained largely oblivious to me. Eddie was telling her about a really
interesting place in Burma, not too far from Pagan, but off the beaten path,
nevertheless.
When I came back a couple of hours later, I could smell
Eddie’s Burma cheroots, and I knew he must have taken on a fair load of Dutch
courage, because in the normal course of events Lek wouldn’ t have let him
smoke one of those things in the Cheri-Tone or even fifty meters upwind of the
place.
Eddie was surrounded, now, by several uniformed vagabonds,
though Olga had situated herself close enough to surround him all by herself.
It turned out, according to the account I got a couple of days later, he’d quickly
established his supremacy in this little herd, no matter he was sporting a
rumpled but clean khaki safari suit and laced leather shoes. Where this guy had
done that, for example, Eddie’d aced him with six months in Kathmandu in 1967. Where that guy, on the other hand, had been there, Eddie had
trumped him with a hike through northern India back when villagers didn’t even
know
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