nose with a ringer. I stared past Martin’s arm. I needed to get some Bon Ami and really scrub that sink.
“And one day—it was about midmorning, we were up in the Chama Mountains ... we were making a delivery to one of the better guys. Out of nowhere, we were ambushed by another group who’d heard somehow about the delivery. I got the scar on my shoulder, Shelby got a worse wound in the leg. And Jimmy Dell got his head blown off.”
I took in my breath quickly. I was married to man who had witnessed this barbarity, this horror, had been part of it. I began to shiver. I wanted this story over.
“Shelby and I got out of there, just barely. We had to leave Jimmy Dell, and he was our pilot.
Shelby knew enough about the copter to get us out, though he was bleeding like a stuck pig. And then it took us a while to heal. We heard the group we were supposed to take the guns to were all dead before we got there. When we came back to the States, Shelby went to see Jimmy Dell’s family in Florida. Jimmy Dell had been the oldest kid by far, and there were five more after him.
The youngest one was Angel. She was too young then, Shelby thought, and Mr. Dunn surely thought so, too. So Shelby wandered for a while.”
And Martin had gone to stay on that isolated farm in Ohio with a man he hated, just to have a familiar place to recover. And while he was there, he hooked back up with Cindy. And they married. And he never told her this. Or not all of it. Ridiculously, I could not stop shivering.
“After a few years Shelby went back to Florida. Angel had gotten interested in martial arts in high school after something happened to her, and she got Shelby interested, too. They got married, and they began working as a team of bodyguards.”
Gee, I wondered whom you would work for in southern Florida.
“But they didn’t want to work for that kind.” My face must have spoken for me. “So later, mostly they worked at the smaller movie studios up and down the East Coast, guarding people who were there temporarily. Some of the people were pretty famous.” Martin attempted a smile.
“And they did some stunts in karate movies, too. Their last job was for a woman who told Shelby she owed a lot of money to the wrong people.
“She didn’t owe it, Roe.” Martin looked directly at me. “She’d stolen it, and they found her.
They let the Young-bloods live, but they gave them a beating they’d remember. Angel was in the hospital, still, when Shelby came up here to find me. In their line of work, you can’t get insurance, and they were broke, and they needed to leave the area for a while. I’d been worried about you being out here by yourself when I was out of town, and the apartment being empty . . .
you’re shaking.”
He came over to me in two steps, waited a moment to see if I would hit him if he touched me, then put his arms around me. I felt his heavy muscles encircle me, and I had the stray thought that the workouts I had attributed to a desire to stay fit and look good were actually aimed toward keeping him ready for self-defense. I lay my head against his thick chest and let some of the shaking be absorbed by him.
“So,” he said to the top of my hair, almost in a whisper, “what’s going to happen now?”
“I’m going to get some Bon Ami and scrub the sink.”
Martin held me away from him. He was angry. “I’ll go in the family room and work until you feel like talking.”
He left the kitchen through the hall door, his shoes making little noises on the hardwood as he crossed the hall.
I got the Bon Ami and a sponge with a rough scrubbing side, and set to work. I thought of a conversation I’d had with my mother. We’d been talking about love, and she’d said that women who stay with men who damage them have some deep need to be damaged; they can’t possibly love the damager, that can’t be the reason they stay. A woman with a strong sense of self-preservation will leave the bad relationship to save
“And one day—it was about midmorning, we were up in the Chama Mountains ... we were making a delivery to one of the better guys. Out of nowhere, we were ambushed by another group who’d heard somehow about the delivery. I got the scar on my shoulder, Shelby got a worse wound in the leg. And Jimmy Dell got his head blown off.”
I took in my breath quickly. I was married to man who had witnessed this barbarity, this horror, had been part of it. I began to shiver. I wanted this story over.
“Shelby and I got out of there, just barely. We had to leave Jimmy Dell, and he was our pilot.
Shelby knew enough about the copter to get us out, though he was bleeding like a stuck pig. And then it took us a while to heal. We heard the group we were supposed to take the guns to were all dead before we got there. When we came back to the States, Shelby went to see Jimmy Dell’s family in Florida. Jimmy Dell had been the oldest kid by far, and there were five more after him.
The youngest one was Angel. She was too young then, Shelby thought, and Mr. Dunn surely thought so, too. So Shelby wandered for a while.”
And Martin had gone to stay on that isolated farm in Ohio with a man he hated, just to have a familiar place to recover. And while he was there, he hooked back up with Cindy. And they married. And he never told her this. Or not all of it. Ridiculously, I could not stop shivering.
“After a few years Shelby went back to Florida. Angel had gotten interested in martial arts in high school after something happened to her, and she got Shelby interested, too. They got married, and they began working as a team of bodyguards.”
Gee, I wondered whom you would work for in southern Florida.
“But they didn’t want to work for that kind.” My face must have spoken for me. “So later, mostly they worked at the smaller movie studios up and down the East Coast, guarding people who were there temporarily. Some of the people were pretty famous.” Martin attempted a smile.
“And they did some stunts in karate movies, too. Their last job was for a woman who told Shelby she owed a lot of money to the wrong people.
“She didn’t owe it, Roe.” Martin looked directly at me. “She’d stolen it, and they found her.
They let the Young-bloods live, but they gave them a beating they’d remember. Angel was in the hospital, still, when Shelby came up here to find me. In their line of work, you can’t get insurance, and they were broke, and they needed to leave the area for a while. I’d been worried about you being out here by yourself when I was out of town, and the apartment being empty . . .
you’re shaking.”
He came over to me in two steps, waited a moment to see if I would hit him if he touched me, then put his arms around me. I felt his heavy muscles encircle me, and I had the stray thought that the workouts I had attributed to a desire to stay fit and look good were actually aimed toward keeping him ready for self-defense. I lay my head against his thick chest and let some of the shaking be absorbed by him.
“So,” he said to the top of my hair, almost in a whisper, “what’s going to happen now?”
“I’m going to get some Bon Ami and scrub the sink.”
Martin held me away from him. He was angry. “I’ll go in the family room and work until you feel like talking.”
He left the kitchen through the hall door, his shoes making little noises on the hardwood as he crossed the hall.
I got the Bon Ami and a sponge with a rough scrubbing side, and set to work. I thought of a conversation I’d had with my mother. We’d been talking about love, and she’d said that women who stay with men who damage them have some deep need to be damaged; they can’t possibly love the damager, that can’t be the reason they stay. A woman with a strong sense of self-preservation will leave the bad relationship to save
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