perfect as I could imagine.
88
Astrid Amara
Chapter Nine
Uncle Al’s room was the only one left that Ethan and I hadn’t searched. Our
opportunity came the morning of the fifth day, when Al and my father dressed in multiple
layers of Gortex and wool to venture down the street to the Dektor family household in
search of extra supplies. Our candles and toilet paper were running dangerously low.
As soon as they departed Ethan and I ran upstairs and went through my uncle’s
belongings. Al was sloppy; his stuff strewn across the sewing room as though he never
planned on leaving.
“Hey, check this out,” Ethan said quietly. I walked over to the suitcase that Ethan
methodically searched. He held a magazine and wore a mischievous smirk.
It was Bouncers, a porn magazine with the most ridiculous cover I’d seen in a long
time. A woman with massive breasts waved an American flag and wore a red, white, and
blue G-string, nothing else.
“That’s brave,” I said. “Bringing porn on your family visit.” I took the magazine and
flipped through the pages, Ethan at my back, looking over my shoulder.
Holiday Outing
89
We both started laughing. There is a fine line between erotic and ridiculous, and this
magazine excelled in repeatedly crossing it. It didn’t help that the subject matter wasn’t to
either Ethan’s or my tastes.
Ethan cracked up at one spread and grabbed the magazine from me, turning it several
ways before settling on a specific angle. “There,” he said. “Now is the cola really necessary in
this shot?”
“That’s not cola.” I laughed. “What’s wrong with you? Can’t you tell a beer bottle when
you see one?”
Ethan squinted, and then turned the page.
Now we were in a section of the magazine that included men with the women, and my
mood altered as we stared at the photos.
Ethan drew closer to me. His hand rested lightly on my shoulder, but it felt heavy and
hot, like a weight, sinking through my body. A slow, warm arousal spread through me and
the magazine lost its hilarity as my desire grew.
“I didn’t think you could have hard dicks in soft porn,” Ethan said, his voice husky.
“This does not qualify as soft,” I told him. His hand stroked down my back invitingly.
“I can tell that your list of vices to be ignored includes not only smoking but pornography as
well.”
Ethan tilted my face toward him and kissed me.
I kissed him back, enjoying the slow, lazy pace he set. The magazine tumbled from my
hands.
Rachel popped her head in.
“Have you seen --” She froze.
Ethan and I bolted apart.
“Sorry!” she said, turning bright red. She fled the room.
90
Astrid Amara
I wiped a shaky hand over my mouth. Ethan stared at me, wide-eyed. “I’m sorry too,”
he said.
“It’s okay,” I said, but I didn’t feel it. My stomach knotted. I had no idea how Rachel
would react. “I better go talk to her.”
“I don’t think we’re going to find the pushke in here, in any case,” Ethan said. He was
slightly pale, and I felt bad. All this sneaking around was obnoxious, especially for someone
openly out.
Ethan put back Uncle Al’s belongings exactly the way we found them, and I went in
search of Rachel. I found her downstairs by the fire, sitting with my mother. When I came in
she blushed again and looked away.
I sat and chatted with them both until my mother declared it time to think about
dinner and left for the kitchen. Rachel got up to help but I reached for her arm and held her
back.
“Can I talk to you for a second?” I asked.
“Sure.” She sat down beside me, in front of the fire. It smelled like cypress -- my father
must have moved on to burning his exotic woods collection.
“Sorry about that,” I told her.
Rachel shrugged. “That’s okay.”
“I hope you aren’t shocked.”
“Nah. I think it’s cool.” She smiled shyly. “You guys look really happy together.”
“Thanks,” I said, feeling a swelling of emotion
88
Astrid Amara
Chapter Nine
Uncle Al’s room was the only one left that Ethan and I hadn’t searched. Our
opportunity came the morning of the fifth day, when Al and my father dressed in multiple
layers of Gortex and wool to venture down the street to the Dektor family household in
search of extra supplies. Our candles and toilet paper were running dangerously low.
As soon as they departed Ethan and I ran upstairs and went through my uncle’s
belongings. Al was sloppy; his stuff strewn across the sewing room as though he never
planned on leaving.
“Hey, check this out,” Ethan said quietly. I walked over to the suitcase that Ethan
methodically searched. He held a magazine and wore a mischievous smirk.
It was Bouncers, a porn magazine with the most ridiculous cover I’d seen in a long
time. A woman with massive breasts waved an American flag and wore a red, white, and
blue G-string, nothing else.
“That’s brave,” I said. “Bringing porn on your family visit.” I took the magazine and
flipped through the pages, Ethan at my back, looking over my shoulder.
Holiday Outing
89
We both started laughing. There is a fine line between erotic and ridiculous, and this
magazine excelled in repeatedly crossing it. It didn’t help that the subject matter wasn’t to
either Ethan’s or my tastes.
Ethan cracked up at one spread and grabbed the magazine from me, turning it several
ways before settling on a specific angle. “There,” he said. “Now is the cola really necessary in
this shot?”
“That’s not cola.” I laughed. “What’s wrong with you? Can’t you tell a beer bottle when
you see one?”
Ethan squinted, and then turned the page.
Now we were in a section of the magazine that included men with the women, and my
mood altered as we stared at the photos.
Ethan drew closer to me. His hand rested lightly on my shoulder, but it felt heavy and
hot, like a weight, sinking through my body. A slow, warm arousal spread through me and
the magazine lost its hilarity as my desire grew.
“I didn’t think you could have hard dicks in soft porn,” Ethan said, his voice husky.
“This does not qualify as soft,” I told him. His hand stroked down my back invitingly.
“I can tell that your list of vices to be ignored includes not only smoking but pornography as
well.”
Ethan tilted my face toward him and kissed me.
I kissed him back, enjoying the slow, lazy pace he set. The magazine tumbled from my
hands.
Rachel popped her head in.
“Have you seen --” She froze.
Ethan and I bolted apart.
“Sorry!” she said, turning bright red. She fled the room.
90
Astrid Amara
I wiped a shaky hand over my mouth. Ethan stared at me, wide-eyed. “I’m sorry too,”
he said.
“It’s okay,” I said, but I didn’t feel it. My stomach knotted. I had no idea how Rachel
would react. “I better go talk to her.”
“I don’t think we’re going to find the pushke in here, in any case,” Ethan said. He was
slightly pale, and I felt bad. All this sneaking around was obnoxious, especially for someone
openly out.
Ethan put back Uncle Al’s belongings exactly the way we found them, and I went in
search of Rachel. I found her downstairs by the fire, sitting with my mother. When I came in
she blushed again and looked away.
I sat and chatted with them both until my mother declared it time to think about
dinner and left for the kitchen. Rachel got up to help but I reached for her arm and held her
back.
“Can I talk to you for a second?” I asked.
“Sure.” She sat down beside me, in front of the fire. It smelled like cypress -- my father
must have moved on to burning his exotic woods collection.
“Sorry about that,” I told her.
Rachel shrugged. “That’s okay.”
“I hope you aren’t shocked.”
“Nah. I think it’s cool.” She smiled shyly. “You guys look really happy together.”
“Thanks,” I said, feeling a swelling of emotion
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