An Unexpected Widow (The Colorado Brides Series) by Carré White Page B

step, then two, still wearing my nightgown, which I hadn’t removed in days.
    Not having eaten much, I was weak, the effort to cry and crawl had exhausted me, and I slipped down the remainder of the steps, landing on my belly. I lay there crying, the pain nearly unbearable. During a lull, I managed to work my way to the kitchen, grasping a chair and hauling myself to my feet. Things had been put away neatly, and there was freshly baked bread on the table, along with salt and pepper.
    There were shelves above the sink filled with glasses and plates. The medications that Doctor Caldwell had prescribed for Frank were there as well, and my eyes fell upon an amber colored bottle with a small cork lid. Knowing what this was, I grasped it, pulling out the top. I poured water from a pitcher into a cup. Fat droplets of medication fell into the water. I’d been told how much to administer to Frank, but I gave myself more.
    Drinking the concoction, I grimaced at the bitter taste. I sat at the table, waiting to feel better, and it didn’t take long. A heady rush went through me, warming me from the inside out, leaving a sense of wellbeing in its pleasurable wake.
    “Now…that’s more like it.” My voice sounded thick, distant.
    As I rubbed my nose, my face felt numb. My body seemed to turn to pudding, the arms falling to the sides. I wasn’t certain how long I sat this way, but I eventually got to my feet, feeling as if a warm, snuggly blanket had been placed upon me. In the parlor, I lay on the sofa, my head rolling from side to side. My mind had stopped spinning; the ceaseless chatter had halted. I was fully at peace for the first time since I had lost my husband, and it was as if I didn’t have a care in the world. I’d closed my eyes, but I wasn’t sleeping. The euphoric state continued…blissfully so. I barely heard the sound of talking, although I sensed I wasn’t alone now.
    “What’s she doing down here?” asked Maria.
    “I don’t know.” Arms grasped me. “Hannah?” It was Nathan, who stared at me, his eyes taking me in. “Are you all right?”
    “F-fine…”
    “What did she take?” He shook me. “What did you take?” Now he was angry.
    “I think this.” Maria handed him the small glass bottle.
    “Dammit!” I was in his arms, as he lifted me. “No! You’re not doing this. Throw it out. Get rid of it now!”
    “Yes, sir.”
    “Blast it, Hannah. No! You’re not going down this road. I should’ve known better than to leave you in bed all week. Son of a gun!” He brought me to the stairs, taking the first steps. “I gotta put a stop to this right now.” In the bedroom, he placed me on top of the blanket, leaning over me. “I’m not going to watch you waste away to nothing. Do you hear? Do you hear me?”
    “I…feel better.”
    “No, you’re drugged outta your mind, woman. That’s not feeling better. I’ve seen what that garbage does to people. It’s not the road you want to take, honey. Trust me.”
    “I hurt, Nathan.” My speech was slurred.
    He sat on the bed, his face filled with concern. “I know you hurt, honey. I’m sorry for your pain, but it’ll get better. You’re gonna feel better.”
    “God took everything from me.”
    A deep sigh escaped. “No he didn't. Life just happened. Sometimes it’s a load of horse manure.” He ran fingers through his hair. “I’m not gonna watch you waste away to nothin’. I’m sorry, but that ain’t gonna happen.”
    “I’m…fine.”
    “No, you’re not.”
    My hand reached for his. “Don’t leave me, Nathan.”
    His look was pained, as he swallowed with effort. “I won’t. I promise, I won’t.”
     

Chapter Eleven
     
    I wasn’t allowed to stay in bed all day long again. Nathan appeared in the doorway the next morning; his expression was grim. “We got work to do. Get dressed.”
    My head felt fuzzy from the day before. “You can’t bark orders at me. This is my farm.”
    “And you’re gonna milk your own blasted