Almost Midnight by Teresa McCarthy Page A

you’re going to slice my heart in two.
    And he could do that very thing, if she let him.
    But he wouldn’t, not if she could hold out for the summer and take the job at Reach Medicals. She would miss Jeremy, but he wasn’t her child. She had to remember that, and Tanner Clearbrook wasn’t her husband. Her real husband had died. And so had her feelings for having another controlling man in her life, attraction or not.
    Tanner and Jeremy were not her family, but the least she could do was help the boy accept his mother’s death and bring him closer to his father.
    Yes, she assured herself, that’s the least she could do.
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     

CHAPTER SEVEN
     
    Tanner threw the backpacks into his Dodge Ram 4x4 and gazed up at the sky. There were a few low hanging clouds, but it was nothing to worry about, and if the weather changed, they would head right back home. A slight breeze ruffled his hair, bringing him the scent of fresh pines and newly mowed grass. All in all, it was a beautiful day to go hiking.
    “She always thinks I’m too wild and that I’m going to hurt myself,” Jeremy said to his father as they waited for Hannah.  
    Tanner leaned against the back of the truck. “Yeah, well, women are like that sometimes.” 
    Jeremy mimicked his father’s stance against the truck and folded his arms across his chest. “Why?”
    “I don’t know. They’re made different than boys.”
    “Why?”
    “Because that’s the way God made them, I guess.”
    “How do you know about God? You don’t even go to church with Grandpa and me.”
    Tanner pursed his lips. How long had it been since he had brought his son to church? Since Julie had died? Next Sunday he would make a point of going.
    “You think Mom can hear me in heaven?”
    Tanner cleared his throat. “Sure she can.”
    “Then you think she knows I’m sorry.”
    “Sorry?” Concerned, Tanner knelt before his son. It wasn’t as if they hadn’t had conversations about Jeremy’s mother, but Jeremy barely talked about Julie.
    Tanner knew that if the boy had brought up this conversation now, without prodding, it was a milestone for Jeremy and their relationship. “Sorry for what, partner?”
    Jeremy worried his bottom lip. “I yelled at her when she was in the hospital. I told her I wouldn’t love her if she died.”
    Tanner’s chest tightened. He had never heard this confession from his son, and he felt a bit guilty as a father. “And then she died, huh?”
    Jeremy nodded, his eyes filling with tears. “I think she died of a broken heart. Billy Green, the guy that sits next to me at school, said that sometimes people die like that. Their hearts just break.” 
    “Your mom loved you, partner.” Tanner pulled Jeremy into his arms. “Sometimes we say things and do things we don’t mean.” 
    “Yeah, I guess so. Like me being mad at you because you weren’t there.”
    Tanner’s throat began to close. “I didn’t know she was going to die, Jeremy. You have to believe me. I loved your mother and that never changed, and your mother loved you. That’s what counts. You have to always remember that.”
    “Yeah, that’s what Hannah told me, too.” Jeremy wiped a hand across his face. “She said sometimes there are things you can’t control, like you not being able to be with Mama when...well, you know...”
    Tanner felt the fragile little shoulders beneath his hands shake, and he closed his eyes, grateful for the son he was given. “Yeah...I know, partner.”
    They stood there for at least a minute, holding each other.
    “Gosh, here she comes, Dad. Let go.” Jeremy pushed away from his father and wiped the wetness from his cheeks. “Aw gee, she’s got raincoats with her. Do we really need raincoats?” He gave Tanner the defeated look that men knew all too well.
    Tanner took another glance at the sky and frowned. “We’ll leave them in the truck,” he said out of the corner of his mouth, the whispered