Aching to Submit
been for Amanda.
    “Hey, Sophie,” she said, taking her hand and inching close to her sister-in-law. Although Mandy was ten years older than she was, Sophie considered her a friend. “How are you? How are you adjusting to wet Holland? I’m sorry I haven’t been to visit in a while; it’s a little busy with Rosa.”
    “It’s okay, I understand, Amanda,” she said. “Besides, it’s going better. God, she’s grown, huh?” Sophie asked, ruffling Rosa’s head of curls, trying to divert the attention from herself.
    “Yeah, you should see how much she eats and she started walking. Kind of.” As she said it, the two watched Michael set Rosa down on the grass. He held her hand as she took three steps before plopping down onto her bottom.
    Amanda and Sophie giggled. “She’s sweet,” Sophie said.
    Amanda turned to her and Sophie realized how badly she hid her emotions. “Hey, you never know what will happen. You’re young and healthy, Michael’s old but healthy,” she said, making a face at Michael as she poked Sophie with her bony elbow. “You just don’t know what will happen,” she said again. Amanda was the only one of the family they’d told about the miscarriages. Sophie wasn’t ready to tell the rest of his family just yet. She wasn’t sure she ever would be.
    The next hour dragged as they ate cake and everyone watched Rosa taking her few steps here and there. Sophie poured herself a large glass of Prosecco, her favorite sparkling wine, and watched the family and friends engage in easy conversation. There were about thirty people total; several kids but mostly friends of her in-laws. Her mother-in-law had greeted her as usual and Sophie tried to remember the differences between the cultures, tried to remember the fact that this was her husband’s mother. Her father-in-law was the opposite, treating her no differently than he did his daughters. In the end, she wondered how much was her own doing as she stood alone in the kitchen watching them talk and laugh. The language certainly didn’t help, but there was more to it than that.
    She swallowed a large sip and went to the bathroom. At least Karen wasn’t here yet. She hoped they could leave before she got here, but knew she was out of luck when she heard her voice as she exited the bathroom.
    Her already tense stomach tightened even more and she hoped she could get to Michael before running into his older sister.
    Karen hadn’t ever even pretended to like her. Although this was Sophie’s first marriage, it was Michael’s second. He’d been married to Karen’s best friend, Carly, before he’d met Sophie. Sophie always had the impression Karen blamed her for their divorce even though they’d been legally separated when he moved to the States. And Michael said it had been over long before they’d actually parted ways.
    Their first trip to Holland had been a surprise for Sophie. Michael had arranged everything. Once she’d gotten on the airplane, Sophie had been so excited to meet his family, see where he was from, see Amsterdam. It was her first trip overseas. The greeting she’d had though had been less than welcoming. It had, in fact, been extremely uncomfortable. Michael had realized his mistake, the fact that he was bringing her over too soon, before the ink had dried on the divorce papers was how Karen had put it. His mother put so much weight in Karen’s opinions that Sophie had never even had a chance.
    “Hey.” Amanda was standing in the kitchen when Sophie walked in. She was obviously waiting for her.
    “Hey,” she said. “What is it?” Amanda’s face was strange and she looked out the window onto the garden.
    Sophie followed her line of vision, some very possessive side of her coming alive. Michael stood talking to a woman, a very attractive woman, who had one hand on his arm and one hand on the head of a child who looked about two. She was smiling as she stared up at Michael’s face.
    “Who’s that?” she asked.
    Amanda

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