A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Hostile Hospital by Lemony Snicket Page A

right on his heels. Mr. Sirin looked back to see how close they were--four officers in their bright-pink uniforms, with small flashlights in their left hands and large nets in their right--and realized that in a moment they would catch up, and arrest him and his six favorite butterflies, which were frantically flapping alongside him. Mr. Sirin did not care much if he was captured--he had been in prison four and a half times over the course of his long and complicated life--but he cared very much about the butterflies. He realized that these six delicate insects would undoubtedly perish in bug prison, where poisonous spiders, stinging bees, and other criminals would rip them to shreds. So, as the secret police closed in, Mr. Sirin opened his mouth as wide as he could and swallowed all six butterflies whole, quickly placing them in the dark but safe confines of his empty stomach. It was not a pleasant feeling to have these six insects living inside him, but Mr. Sirin kept them there for three years, eating only the lightest foods served in prison so as not to crush the insects with a clump of broccoli or a baked potato. When his prison sentence was over, Mr. Sirin burped up the grateful butterflies and resumed his lepidoptery work in a community that was much more friendly to scientists and their specimens. I am telling you this story not just to reveal the courage and imagination of one of my dearest friends, but to help you imagine how Klaus and Sunny felt as they watched Esme Squalor, disguised as an associate of Dr. Flacutono, walk down the hallway of Heimlich Hospital carrying the long, rusty knife disguised as a surgical tool to be used on Violet. The two youngsters realized that their only chance of finding the Surgical Ward and rescuing their sister was to try and fool this greedy and stiletto-heeled villain, but as they approached her, like Mr. Sirin during his fifth and final prison sentence, the two Baudelaires felt the unpleasant fluttering of butterflies in their stomachs. "Excuse me, ma'am," Klaus said, trying to sound less like a thirteen-year-old boy and more like someone who had graduated from medical school. "Did you say you were an associate of Dr. Flacutono?" "If you're someone with a hearing problem," Esme said rudely, "don't bother me. Go to the Ear Ward." "I'm not someone with a hearing problem," Klaus said. "This woman and I are associates of Dr. Flacutono." Esme stopped in the middle of stabbing the floor, and stared down at the two siblings. Klaus and Sunny could see her eyes shining behind the veil of her fashionable hat as she regarded the children before replying. "I was just wondering where you were," she said. "Come along with me, and I'll take you to the patient." "Patsy," Sunny said. "What she is saying," Klaus said quickly, "is that we're very concerned about Laura V. Bleediotie." "Well, you won't be concerned for long," Esme replied, leading the children around a corner to another hallway. "Here, you carry the knife." The evil girlfriend handed Klaus the rusty blade, and leaned in closely to talk with him. "I'm glad you two are here," she whispered. "The brat's little brother and sister haven't been captured yet, and we still don't have the file on the Snicket fires. The authorities removed it for their investigation. The boss says we might have to torch the place." "Torch?" Sunny asked. "Mattathias will take care of that part," Esme said, looking around the hallway to make sure no one could hear them. "All you have to do is assist with the surgery. Let's hurry up." Esme walked up a stairway as fast as her shoes could carry her, and the children followed nervously behind her, Klaus holding the rusty, jagged knife. With every door they opened, every hallway they walked down, and every staircase they ascended, the youngsters were afraid that at any moment Esme would see through their disguises and realize who they were. But the greedy woman was too busy pausing to yank the blades of the stiletto