A Family for Christmas by Noelle Adams Page B

was
amazing.”
    He
looked rather pleased at her words and stretched out beside her, pulling her
closer with one of his arms. “Good. You’re pretty good yourself.”
    “I
wasn’t expecting it to be nearly so good.”
    He
stiffened slightly. “Why wouldn’t you think it would be good?”
    “Nothing
about you,” she said quickly. “Just sex in general. Especially the first time.”
    He
gently stroked her hair. “I think we can do even better. I usually have more
control than that. It’s been a long time for me, and you’ve been making me
crazy with lust for a while now.”
    “Really?”
She looked up at his face with a pleased smile, realizing he was serious.
    “Yeah.”
    “Well,
I’ve kind of wanted you too.”
    “Good.”
He kissed her hair with a sigh.
    She
felt close to him—closer than she’d ever felt to a man before. She wanted to
snuggle against him. But she was suddenly hit with the knowledge that it wasn’t
always going to be like this between them.
    They
were headed for India, where they would both pour themselves into their work.
She wasn’t even going to live with him a lot of the time, since he had to spend
the school year in the States.
    She
had to be careful about getting ideas that weren’t practical, weren’t smart,
weren’t part of their arranged agreement.
    So
she made herself pull away from his warm body, no matter how much she wanted to
be close to it. “Thank you,” she said, sitting up in bed and pulling a sheet up
to cover her breasts when she felt kind of self-conscious.
    “You’re
welcome,” he said, blinking slightly in what might be surprise. “Thank you .”
    “I
think I can sleep now, so I’m going to head back to bed.”
    He
nodded, pulling back from her slightly. “Okay. Sure.”
    Something
felt awkward between them for the first time, but she ignored it because she
had to get away before she started having daydreams that would never come true.
    She
grabbed her pajamas from the floor and pulled them on, feeling suddenly so sore
between the legs that she winced.
    “Are
you okay?” he asked, raising himself up.
    “I’m
fine,” she said quickly, limping to the door. “A little sore. Nothing too bad.
It was great.”
    He
stared at her, revealing nothing. Feeling like he’d pulled back in some way.
“Yeah. Goodnight.”
    “Night.”
    Then
she was finally out of the door and back in the safety of her room.
    She
felt weird and shaking and like she hadn’t handled things right, but she wasn’t
sure what else she could do.
    They
weren’t in love. They would never be that way.
    They
could have sex if they both wanted to, but she didn’t get to spend the night in
his arms.

Seven
     
    The next morning, Lydia
woke up groggy and with a heaviness in the pit of her stomach, and it took her
a few minutes to remember why.
    She’d
had sex with Gabe last night, and now she felt weird about it.
    There
was no reason to feel that way. They were married. They could have sex if they
both wanted to, and clearly both of them had last night. She tried to talk
herself back into her normal reasonable perspective, but didn’t succeed.
    Her
head felt so fuzzy that she pulled a sweatshirt on over her pajamas and went
downstairs for coffee. She was a little sore between her legs, and each time
she felt the pang of pain, she remembered why, making her feel a little
heavier.
    The
heaviness only increased when she realized that Gabe and Ellie were already up
and in the kitchen. She heard them before she turned the corner to see.
    “Good
morning,” she said brightly, determined not to let Gabe see that she felt
uncomfortable about the night before.
    “Morning,”
he said, glancing back from the stove, where he appeared to be making pancakes.
He was wearing a sweatshirt and pajama pants, just like her, and his hair was
rumpled and eyelids heavier than normal. But his blue eyes were sharp as they
rested on her.
    She
smiled breezily and turned to Ellie, who was seated at the table