donât want toââ
âItâs not that I donât want to. I justâ¦Iâm a little surprised that you would ask me, considering my vast lack of experience with kids.â
âWell, Max adores you, and you know his bedtime routine. Besides, heâs pretty easygoing. I canât imagine that heâll give you any trouble. And if you do decide to be a permanent part of his life, you canât keep coming over here and just visiting him forever. Youâll have to get used to being alone with him. Sometimes overnight.â
The idea both intrigued and made him nervous as hell. He would have to baby-proof his apartment, buy toys and baby furniture. With two extra bedrooms he definitely had the space. These just werenât things heâd taken into consideration before.
âBut like I said, if youâre not comfortable watching him,itâs okay. I donât want you to think that Iâm trying to push you into something youâre not ready for.â
âNo, Iâd like to do it,â he said, and realized, for all his doubts, he really did.
âGreat! Can you be over at my place around seven-fifteen? That will give me time to show you where everything is before Beth picks me up.â
âI can do that.â
âI donât know what youâre doing tonight, but Max and I were going to decorate the tree around seven.â
With a dinner meeting scheduled for six-thirty with his team, there was no way he was getting out of work before eight tonight. So he might see him for ten minutes before he went to bed. Meaning he would be going over there to see her , not Max, which he didnât think was a good idea after last night.
âI just canât swing it tonight, but maybe I can stop by around lunchtime tomorrow.â
âSure. That would be great.â She paused, then asked, âBy the way, did you get anything in the mail from Beth and Leo yet?â
âI donât know.â Heâd brought a pile of mail with him to work this morning but hadnât had time to go through it yet. âHold on, let me look.â
He grabbed the pile and rifled through it until he saw the greeting-card-sized envelope with Beth and Leoâs return address. He tore it open, but it wasnât a card. It was an invitation to their annual New Years Eve party. Nathan went every year, except last year, and only because he figured he would run into Ana there. Heâd known she was expecting, and the idea of seeing her, pregnant with another manâs babyâ¦hell, for all he knew she would bring the father with her. Had he known it was his kid, he might have felt differently.
âI take it you got an invitation too?â Nathan said.
âYeah. I wondered if you were planning to go. I wanted to, but with us both thereâ¦well, it might be a little weird having to pretend we donât like each other.â
âWe canât stop socializing just because weâll run into each other. Thatâs not fair to either of us.â
âI guess not. So youâre going to go?â
If only to prove that this thing between them didnât have to be a big deal. âYeah, Iâm going.â
âThen I am too,â she said.
They talked for a few more minutes about Max, and though Ana never once mentioned what had happened last night, it hung between them unspoken. He could hardly believe he was thinking this, but maybe not talking about it hadnât been such a hot idea after all. Not if it was going to make things awkward. He would probably feel worse if he had been the one to make the first move. Not that he couldnât have told her no. But that would have left her feeling dejected and hurt.
In other words, he slept with her to spare her feelings? How philanthropic of him. Why couldnât he just be honest with himself and admit that he slept with Ana because he wanted to? He still wanted to. It would take a hell of a lot
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