A Cast of Shadows: An Araneae Nation Story by Hailey Edwards Page B

my interest, it seemed all my walk had done was stoke my desire for Brynmor to pleasure me in the flesh. I could muster the determination to leave if I knew what I left behind was less than I imagined we could be. Our one encounter, unable to touch or taste him, made me ache to learn the textures of his body. I would map his contours with my fingers and discover what made his rigid control snap.
    “I take it that means you’re interested,” I said, drawing out the moment.
    “I am.” He trailed a finger across my jaw, and my eyes rolled shut. “Very.”
    Behind my eyelids, in the dark, it was easier to keep the tremble from my voice. “Good.”
    “Daraja.” His voice came near my ear.
    My eyes cracked open to find him standing at my side. “Yes?”
    Muscle flexed in his cheek before he grated out, “Don’t go.”
    The words I won’t were perched on my lips. Days ago I might have accepted his offer, but I was a different person now than I had been. Being with Brynmor changed me, opened my eyes to the possibilities of the world, and I re-imagined my place within it. I could be more than a wife. I could be more than a mother. I could pursue my interests and my desires. I could be…myself.
    “I must.” I turned my cheek so his lips no longer brushed my ear.
    “I understand.” His sigh blew warm air across my neck, and I shivered. “I promised myself I wouldn’t ask you to stay, that I would let you make your own decision, yet I did and you have.”
    Hope sparked in my heart, and I turned so our noses almost touched. “Come with me.”
    Shock widened his eyes, and I would have laughed except that fear chased his surprise.
    “I—I can’t,” he stuttered.
    I cupped his cheek in my hand. “Then we have nothing left to say.”
    His hand covered mine. “Errol—”
    “—has proven he can call you with a thought across great distances.”
    Brynmor glanced away. “He needs me.”
    “Does he? Or do you need him?” Brynmor’s silence told me I was right. “Are you using the pack as an excuse to remain near Cathis? You might have accepted that you can’t play an active role in your son’s life, but have you accepted the fact that if you remain in this world, then you must lead your own? What is the point of being given a second chance if you don’t take it?”
    “Errol is wounded.” Brynmor glanced aside. “His life is in danger until he’s recovered.”
    I forced his gaze back to mine. “I agree he is at risk until he recovers .”
    “You’re asking too much,” he said finally. “It’s too dangerous for him, and for me.”
    “Once Errol has recovered, nothing is holding you here. If he needs you, he can call you.”
    Brynmor shook his head. “It’s not that simple.”
    “You two speak mind to mind,” I pointed out. “You will be in constant contact while we travel. If you can’t hear Errol once we cross onto Segestriidae land, then you can return to Cathis and I’ll continue alone.”
    “You’re asking me for too much.”
    “No.” I patted his cheek. “You’re offering me too little.”
    He grasped my shoulders and shook me. “I’m offering you all I have.”
    “You’re offering me what makes you comfortable. It’s not the same thing.”
    Embers of desire cooled between us, and I shivered from the loss.
    Turning from Brynmor, I ignored the burn of his stare blazing into my back and gathered my things. Tempted as I was to accept his offer, I should leave now. It was the best thing for us both.
    Ties from his past moored him in place. If he cut them, we could drift through life together. By anchoring himself to the life he once had, he cast aside any hope of a future for the two of us.
    “It was a pleasure meeting you, Brynmor.” The smile I gave him was fond. “I hope you and Errol enjoy many years of peace and that Jana prospers.” I waved over my shoulder. “Farewell.”
    Without waiting for a response, I set off down a narrow trail I’d spotted earlier. In my hand, I