A Beautiful Place to Die by Philip Craig Page A

I’ll get rid of the stuff I have left. I swear it. Look, you can come with me when I get out this afternoon and you can watch me burn it, or whatever. That’s it—you come and watch me. What do you say? Please . . . don’t tell my family.”
    â€œYou’ll need somebody to drive you home,” I said. “I’ll do it. Then you give me your stash and I’ll get rid of it. Everything you have.”
    â€œOkay, okay. It’s a deal. I’ll really go straight this time, I swear. Just don’t tell my family.”
    Bad habits are hard to break. I considered myself and my corncob pipe and did not feel particularly superior to Billy and others whose addictions sometimes dominate their lives.
    I went to see George. Susie was there. George looked pretty good, I thought. He was getting some color back.We exchanged insults. When I left, I gave Susie a nod and she followed me out into the hall.
    â€œAs far as I can tell,” I said, “nobody is after Billy. I’ve spent three days asking questions and there’s not a hint anywhere that anybody was after Billy. It looks like it was just an accident.”
    â€œNo.” Her jaw was firmer than her brother’s. “There was nothing wrong with the boat when I took it out. It was perfect.”
    â€œThings can go wrong. They don’t stay perfect.”
    Tears were suddenly oozing from her eyes and running down her face. “The worst part is that maybe it was my fault. I told Jim that I loved him and I think I drove him away. If I hadn’t said it, maybe he’d have stayed on the island and then he wouldn’t have been out in that boat.”
    â€œCut it out, Susie. You’ll be guilty of plenty of things in your life before you’re through. Don’t try to be guilty of this, because you’re not.”
    She crossed her arms and looked down at the floor. “It was Saturday. He had the day off. We were messing around on the beach with a Frisbee and we were really happy and I just ran up to him and told him I loved him. And I tried to kiss him, but he pulled away. He looked shocked, like he was almost sick, and he said, ‘No. No, you don’t. Not like that.’ And he backed away. Then he shook his head and walked off. That afternoon he told Dad that he was leaving the island and going home. I must have cried for hours. When Billy found me in my room that evening and I told him about it, he was furious. He said he’d find out about it and he went to find Jim. But when he talked to me the next day, he wasn’t mad anymore, and he and Jim were still friends and planning that last fishing trip. So it was my fault, you see.”
    â€œNo,” I said, “it wasn’t your fault. It was just one of those things. People fall in love with people who don’t love them back, that’s all. I know he liked you—he just didn’t love you the way you loved him.” I was trying to remember the way it was to be sixteen and in love and was glad I was past that. Then I remembered Zee and wasn’t sure I was past it at all. I dug out my handkerchief, glad that it was a clean one. “Here.”
    She dabbed at her eyes and blew her nose. The Martins were all going through hard times.
    â€œCall your mom and tell her that I’m bringing Billy home, then go back and visit your dad.” She nodded, still looking down, and gave me my handkerchief. “It wasn’t your fault,” I said again, trying not to sound forlorn.
    I went along the hall to emergency and found Zee. She looked very fine.
    â€œI’m going down the beach about seven-thirty,” I said. “Want to come along? There’ll be pretty good light until after nine.”
    No hesitation. “I’ll meet you in the Katama parking lot. You still have my rod and gear.”
    â€œOh, goll darn. I forgot to give them back to you.”
    â€œSure,” she said, “and I